One of the most unforgettable experiences in my life as a faculty was being subjected to a Public Trial through Facebook. Public Trial in a sense that you have been judged by many people without really knowing the real deal, the real story. And I say, it was not easy, stressful, I learned lessons the hard way and I have to go through pain for me to be stronger.
The Story
The event happened I think in 2011, my early years in the academe, there was misunderstanding between the students and the faculty regarding the thesis defense. One of the students was a niece of a Public Commentator in Radio and I was surprised that the issue was broadcasted in Radio and even mentioned my name. When I knew about if from a friend/colleague, I feel mad, I wanted to rebut, so I use the social media as a way of rebuttal to the issue.
But, that was my biggest mistake, because the issue became the "hottest" issue in town and I became "famous" in social media. The radio commentator took a screenshot of my post and created an article about the issue in his page. He had many followers, of course he is a public figure. Then comments and opinions from other people were there, some were really hurting. Everytime, I read it, I want to defend myself but I decided not to because it will not help. I deleted my post about the issue and silently cried. Some judged me without knowing my side, without knowing the whole story, and if I tell my side, will they hear me? Will they listen? I was threatened to administrative cases and relevant matters relevant to my job.
One of my Mama's friends, who happens to know the family of the student, advised me to settle with them privately. And I ate all the PRIDE that I have, I personally went to their house, my Mama's friend accompanied me and I apologized for what happened and explained my side. Thankfully, the family accepted it.
But sadly, the post in Facebook, was not taken down by the radio commentator even if the issue was handled privately. My agony was prolonged, there were still people commenting on it. But thank God, there was a person whom I know, who commented there , I cannot remember the exact words but the thought is "this post will not help in this issue, you are subjecting the faculty to public trial, that you give judgements, there is a proper venue to settle things". After that comment, the post was taken down.
Realizations
I know I made a mistake in this situation, my mistake is that I posted my opinion, my thoughts out of anger and it just triggered a fire. But what I learned? If saying sorry even if you think you are the aggrieved one will be the best option, then do it. Issues will not be settled if both sides are thinking that they are right.
Humans as we are, we make judgements, but it would be best if we would be mindful enough of how are we reacting to a matter, commenting on an issue especially if we don't really know the story behind.
Lastly, think before you click/press that POST button. This experience really taught me to be careful in posting. This is the reason why I am not posting much in my social media accounts especially my predicaments, my rants.
Closing thoughts
There are times in our lives, that God allows circumstances for us to learn and to realize that we need to deal with situations in a proper way. These experience made me more stronger and taught me to be patient, humble and to keep myself on the ground. I am not perfect, I made mistakes, but thanks to God for the guidance and for sending me people who helped me go through the challenges in life. These experiences honed me to become better in my judgements and in my actions.
Thanks for reading and I would love to hear your thoughts. See you around.
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i salute you for being brave in dealing the matters in the humblest ways.. we can't control what others would think of us and their judgment.