Mule days
The days now are long for me, feeding a hope that I really feel makes me weak... I'm sure it's because I tread very hard on earth and I only believe in what I can hold in my hands, in what is safe and not in "what can be", because I've learned that you can't say you're going to drink water until you're drinking water.
In that sense, I get up every day to fight a hard battle that lasts from 9 am until approximately 11 pm.
So I move as best I can in bed, because the mattress is damaged, and I manage to stand on the edge of the bed, barefoot, I put the wireless bugle with kitaro music, shamanic flute in nature and white noise that I use to sleep at night, I put the cell phone turned off wrapped in a red scarf that I use to cover my eyes at night and thus be able to fall asleep faster, I put a bottle of alcohol spray and a brush to comb my hair and how can I hold on to the door handle, to crawl along the walls and leaning on them to get to my room, here to the computer to start working. This is so since May 17 that this problem happened to me.
In the early hours of the morning I must take advantage of posting on my social networks, make the noise post and try to download any file, watch any video or stream from twitch because after 11 am it is IMPOSSIBLE to browse, watch any video or download any thing in this third world country called VENEZUELA because the internet of #inter becomes impossible and prevents it. So this is another factor that I have to deal with. One more load of anguish and anxiety to be able to do things.
Since I get up I only drink water, I try not to eat anything else, I only have soda crackers and 1/4 kilo of Guiana cheese in the fridge, but to get to the fridge I have to make a great effort walking with the chair, and I haven't told them but I've already started to get calluses on my hand from holding the chair and in the palm of my right hand it broke from holding the chair knob so much, I poured alcohol on myself and now I have a scab that It hurts every time I lean on that hand to walk.
I make my publication, after preparing the photo with the text and all that, I wait for it to be 5 in the afternoon, getting into the different things I do like sunflower land, check my stake of something I have out there (you know I do not comment on the things that I know can harm, that is why I am very jealous with this information), I am going to grow some vegetables just for the pleasure of feeling like a farmer, maybe I check the discord, I check the facebook on my phone, I I like some memes and gossip what's trending out there or what people are talking about.
5 pm arrives and Niquelina (the 83-year-old woman who is helping me, my 2nd mother) opens the door, comes to bring me a plate of food, to pour water into the toilet because here we don't have water but 1 hour a day and it's at 7 pm, he makes my bed, empties all the containers with pee from the night before, loads water if there is any, sweeps a little, talks to me, waits for me to eat and leaves, closing the door.
The issue of the door is special, I have some copies of some keys to the gate and the door that another neighbor had, for emergencies like this, I sent them to give it to her so she could come help me, but the lock on my door is special, it has a very particular skill, a game and apparently I'm the only one who can open it, no matter how much I teach her how to open it she tries and she can't, she doesn't want to force it either because she's afraid that the key breaks inside and it's going to be worse because we'll have to find a locksmith and I can't walk and she walks with a cane, so it's not a good idea. So so that he can come into the house to bring me food and help me with the basic things, we did the following: we tied a thread from the door handle from the inside that is tied to the fence and we put a plug in the lock so that this way the door remains open, but closed and tied so that the wind at night does not open it, so in this way she can open the gate, undo the security thread and be able to unlock the door to enter, that is another anguish that I have...
These days my 2nd mom told me that the neighbor downstairs told her that the noise of the chair when I walk bothers her, and it is because I force myself and of course when I touch the legs of the chair the floor makes noise, but I usually I move 1 or 2 times a day, 1 in the afternoon to exercise when I walk with the chair to the living room and that lasts about 20 minutes, and another at night, which is when I suppose it bothers him at around 12 that I have finished work and watch tv and I go to the other room. The neighbor told her to put some socks on the legs of the chair, but I can't because if I do, the chair slides and I might fall. What I decided to do is move around with my plastic bag with my cell phone, bugle, handkerchief and the rest, leaning on the walls to get to the bed.
And to urinate and defecate is another humiliating and very depressing process that I am not going to tell you about, but it is extremely unpleasant and requires a lot of effort on my part.
As you can see, my life is not easy at all, this is for those who call me "grumpy" or "bad tempered" and how can I not have it if I have to overcome things like these on a daily basis?
Anyway, I wanted to tell you how my day to day is since May 17, which changed my life, so they know a little more about my world and it helps me to get out all this that I carry inside and at the same time leave a testimony of what I'm going through, maybe this will help someone, or at least it entertains you who I know love gossip, morbidity and perversity in other people's lives.
And with that I wish you a gossipy #day my dear audience!
