I'm not the real one but I am a Mom

(Fiction)

They say that our mother is one of the strongest woman we ever known. They are our biggest foundation and our greatest supporter. They can do and sacrifice anything for their child's sake. But can our child do the same? Can they also support us on our decisions? Can they also understand our choice?Can they accept the real us? I hope so that every child can really do so. But I guess my daughter will never understand this one. She can't accept the fact that I'm her mother.

I'm Pinky and my daughter is Athena. She is already a teenager and as she grow up, it seems that she also regret that I'm become her mother. Most of the time, I choose to understand her but I can't deny that sometimes I'm also longing for her understanding. She is only my source of strength but she is also the reason why I'm so weak right now. I asked myself if what I did wrong to her that's why she pushes me away. I asses myself if I give everything to her. I admit that I spoiled her since she was a kid. It's because I want her to know that I can also provide even though, I'm just like this. I want her to feel how much I love her. I'm willing to sacrifice everything even my own life.

"Athena, I heard that you have a recognition day tomorrow. Congratulations baby. I promise that I will come there". I said with an excitement.

"No. Don't ever go there. Please don't make a scene there. I don't want to be ashamed because of you. If you still go there, I will resent you as my mother".

"But it's special day for you, don't worry I will behave there. " I tried to convince her but

" What do you want? I already accept you before and I want you to know that my acceptance is already expired. I regret that I give you a chance to be my mother. " Then she walked out.

I don't know what should I feel? I want to talked to her and apologize to her but I can't move in my place right now. It seems that I am a statue who wanted to cry. All this time, I really thought that she already accepts me and she loves me like she used to be. Before she is a sweet girl but now I no longer talked to her. If you are wondering why she act like that to me, it's because I'm not her biological mother. Her mother wants to abort her but I please her not to and I will become the mother of that child. She agree and let me adopt that child. I name her Athena because she is so beautiful. But I guess my love is not enough for her. I am not enough because she wants a real Mom.

Even she said that I should not go on their school, I still go because I want her to feel that I'm proud on her. She is the first honor and I'm very proud as a mother. When the teacher call her name, I can't help but to applause and I can't resist but to cry. When the program ends, I go to her to congratulate her but I already heard some gossips about me.

" Is that Athena's mom? Or should we call her Dad? Hahha"

" Athena is beautiful but look at her parent. If I were her, I will regret that kind of human".

"Now ,I understand why Athena don't want her Mom to be here. Look at her".

It is only some of the words that I heard from her classmates then Athena finally saw me. I smile and supposed to hug her but she run away while crying. I follow her and talked to her

" Baby, congrats".

" Why are you here? I told you that you should not be here.Look, everyone's eyes is on me again. I will be bullied again because of you."

"I'm sorry, I just want to congratulate and support you because I'm your Mom".

" You are not my Mom and you will never be. Look at yourself , you have a muscle and you have a big body. You know what, I just wished that my real mother just abort me than giving me to you. You just make my life miserable. Before, I only accept you because I don't have someone to lean on. But since then, I didn't accept you for you are. I can't accept that my Mom is not a woman. I can't accept that I am raise by a gay like you".

I don't know why but I slapped her. I just can't accept that she said it to me. God knows how I love her some much to the point that I give everything to her.

" Yes I'm a gay,I'm not a real woman. You didn't came from me. I didn't carry you in my womb for 9 months. But my love and care for you is pure. I didn't regret that I raise you because I know that I give you all your needs. If you resent me as a mother, then fine. Leave me if you want. But I just want to say that I'm proud of you and I'm always wait you to come back at me. So if you really choose to leave me, please take care yourself. Mommy Pinky loves you. "

It's been a couple of months since she leave me. I heard that she also met her biological mother and I'm happy that she didn't get mad on her. Until now, I still wait her to come back to me. I believe that she needs some time to accept me as being the real me. Maybe, I'm not her Mom in blood but in my heart, we both know how much I'm willing to do anything for her. Yes, I'm a gay and I'm not a real woman but I want you to tell everyone there that I can also do what every Mom's can do. I can also sacrifice everything just like you. I'm not the real one but my love as a mother is real. For me, being a mother is not only for a real woman because everyone can be a mother. Even those boys who choose to be a mother and father to their children. Even those brothers that serve as a mother to their siblings. And even us, gays who unconditionally love their child even we are not the one who gave birth to them. Mother is a verb. It something you do not just who you are.

Closing Message:

To all of the Mama, Mommy, Grandma, and even to those individual who serve as a mother to their family, Happy Mother's Day. On behalf of your amazing kids, I want you to say Thank you for everything. Thank you for not giving up on us and for always there whenever we need someone. One day is not enough to appreciate all of your efforts because you should be value everyday. And to all of the child out there, before you sleep tonight, give your Mom a tight hug. It's a small act but for our Mom, it's already enough. And please do understand your Mom because we all know that they are trying their very best for us. Happy Mother's again po. 💐💐