I drop the subjects and Stop studying in College

Happy first day of the month dreamers!! How's the start of your August so far? I hope that all of us became productive somehow. Let's cultivate some positive energy and outlook for the rest of the month. Let's claim that we achieve the goals we set for our personal and online hustlings.

"You are incoming 4th year but I think it is the best time to give way for your sibling. We decided that you to stop attending the school, 3 years is already enough for you. Find a job and help your brother to support his studies".

That's the exact words that I hear from my mother's mouth. I can't believe that all of the sudden, she will say that to me. I didn't understand, why now? Why now that I am on my final year to college? I want to ask her but I look to my siblings reaction and I guess they also favor on that decision. Am I selfish if I want to finish my studies? I know that it is hard for them to send 2 college students at the same time because there is an expenses that they need to provide. But I didn't ask for anything, I support myself financially because I don't want to be a burden to them while I achieve my goals. But why it seems that they will not support me to that matter. They want me to stop so that my youngest brother will continue his studies. A moment of silence and I runaway from that set up. I guess even I object, they already decide about it.

I was stunned when I realize that I'm already in the University, in the Dean's office to be exact. Why I am here? Earlier, I am just on the house but suddenly I appear in front of this office. Did I really need to do this? So I knock knock and get inside and talked to our Dean. I even saw my terror professor glaring at me. With a heavy heart, I decide to drop all of the subjects loaded for this semester and tell them that I'm going to stop in college. They are all surprise to what I said, some even asked if I am only depressed that's why I said that words. But this decision is already final I guess. I really want to but I don't have a position to object my Mom's command. So even they stop me to do so, I said to them that my decision will never change. I also start to find a job in order to help my family in our needs.

Is it really the end of my dreams to be a professional? I just want to have a diploma at least but why it seems that the reason why I pursue this is also the reason why I need to stop this dream. As an older sister, I need to sacrifice myself to provide them a good education. I'm all standing on the middle of the street and suddenly my tears fall apart. I was crying until I can't breathe anymore. To that emotions, I suddenly open my eyes and then I realize that all of that is just a dream. I can say that it is a nightmare because it cause me a trouble feelings. Even though I already know that it is just a dream, the fast dug dug dug of my heart didn't stop. On the other hand, I am certain that my Mom will never let me to stop my study because she know how I strive to finish my college. She also supports me throughout my journey.

I don't know why all of the sudden my dream is just like that. I tell about this dream to my Mom and she laughing out loud that it seems that I'm just joking around. She even tell me " Why would I do that? Am I crazy huh?". It seems that it reminded me also that the school year and semester is just a week away today. I'm already stress thinking those subjects that I need to take. I'm just also glad that we are still having online class, so I don't need to spend for transportation and food allowance. They said that graduating students have a lot of expenses so I need to save money to prepare for that. But giving up is not on my wavelength, ngayon pa ba ako susuko? I'm just one step away to achieve my dreams, to wear a black toga and hold my college diploma. So even it is stressful, I will continue my college no matter what.

Appreciation!!

New month but still you are there with me!! Thank you so much dreamers for your endless support. To my dearest sponsors, readers, commenters and upvoters, thank you for always take a visit on my articles. It is my honor to meet and interact with you. Have a fruitful month dreamers!🧡