Blood in Christmas Day

It seems that it just like a glimpse before Christmas day. Most of us are busy preparing their gifts for their family while others also got panicked to buy foods that they will gonna cooked during Noche Buena. It's a season of happiness for everyone but I'm not belong to that. Christmas for me is a bad day. All of my good memories about it turns into blurry sight. I don't want to look back to that good memories. I don't know how to celebrate that just like how we used to be.

I'm Marriotte, a girl who doesn't want to celebrate Christmas. Every year I always want to skip this day because I can't help myself but to cry. I always got pissed off when they greet me " Merry Christmas" because honestly I don't have a reason to celebrate it anymore. You can call me bitter because I'm absolutely I am. You can call me childish because of my behavior when this day comes but I also becomes innocent before.

I honestly love Christmas when I was a kid but everything was change when this unexpected happenings comes to our life. How funny that they said that the color of this season is red. I couldn't agree more because that day was filled with red. Not a red decorations nor a red lights but it was filled with a red, a red blood. Our house was filled with blood. I was supposed to shout " Merry Christmas " at 12 AM but that time I instead shout " Help" when I saw my parents dying on the floor. I saw on my two eyes how she killed my parents and the most shocking part is when the killer is the person whom I trusted the most. The killer is no other than my Nanny. At first, I thought she only was there to save them but she hit my Mom's head again and again. My Nanny takes off the good memories that I have during Christmas day.

So tell me how I could celebrate Christmas after that day? Everytime I close my eyes and tried to forget all those happenings, my eyes can't help my emotions so tears suddenly fell down. I missed my parents so much to the point that I also tried to kill myself. But I've never continue it because I also need to get the justice for them. I should not let that woman be free for her sin. Not only to my parents but most especially to me. She didn't only get my parents but she also get all my innocence. She turns this joyful kid as a loner one. She owes me everything.

Years has passed and she found guilty for that sin. " Jealousy" is the prime reason of it. But we get nothing to her because she didn't speak a word. She only smile creepily when the police asked her. Even all the evidence pointing to her,she still keep her silence and shows that smile. Did she do it for purpose or she is really turns into crazy girl? I honestly want to talked to her because I decided to let go all the pains that I have in this heart. I want to buried all the hatred because I want to start a new life but how I can move one if that person don't want to talked to me. I only want to hear a word " Sorry" but it seems that it's so hard to get it from her.

Last night, I dream about my parents. They were both smiling at me. I want to hug them tight but suddenly my Mom said to me that " Baby, you should forgive that person so we also get peace while resting. We don't want you to live like that. You deserve to live like before, so please remove all the anger". I want to talked back but they suddenly disappeared and I was left alone on that dream. When I woke up, I realize that today is Christmas day. I hurry myself to prepare and go to the jail to visit her. I want to end this one. My mom is right when she said that I must forgive not because it needs to but because I also need to give it to myself. I forgive but I'll never forget.

But it seems too late because when I arrive at the station, the chief said to me that my Nanny commit suicide at exactly 12AM. She finished her life because of despair. I'm mad to her but I don't want to see her taking bath with her own blood. I still want to saw how she change her life into good one but it's really late for that. For the last time, I hug her while whispering " You can rest now Nanny. Even our ending is not good as we expected , I still want you to feel the happiness but it seems that you will have that in the afterlife. I already forgive you, rest in peace now".

Another bloody day on Christmas day. I think this year is not the right time to celebrate it because just like other Christmas, it turns into red days. But I do hope that I can still move on for all of this. Just like others, I also want to celebrate it with a blast and with a joyful heart. May Santa have pity on me to grant this wish of mine.

Greetings!!

Hola ! Hola! Crazy dreamers 👋👋 How's your evening now? I became MIA on these past few days here because I'm in the province now and the connection here is totally poor. And also because I guess there's a problem on RC yesterday because I can't open it. But good thing that I can totally access it now. I'll try to be active now here. Hope that everyone is at their excitement stage to celebrate their Christmas. Make a blast celebration everyone. Keep safe and always nailed your day.

Thank you for your unending support to this little dreamers. Thank you so much and Advance Merry Christmas 🎄⛄⛄