Don't let overthinking take over you

Overthinking for me doesn't have any good effect on us especially on our mental health. It only makes us worry even things are not yet happening. It makes us anxious and scared what tomorrow might bring which I have felt these past few days. I felt that I could die anytime. I also lose my will to live because I don't know what's my purpose anymore. But then God enlightened my mind telling me I should be strong, much stronger because I now have a daughter and she needs me. Despite the days I struggle to think straight, I am very much happy that I am now fine and I can now control my thoughts.

There are a lot of things that I missed and I was not able to do anymore. I miss doing the laundry which I used to enjoy before my panic attacks came. I also missed washing the dishes and helping my grandma with the household chores. Overthinking consumes my time and it ruined my health. Because I am overthinking, I was scared of the things that are not yet happening. I always thought about negative things especially death. Well, maybe this is a part of what they called postpartum. Whatever it is, I don't want to feel this way anymore.

I also noticed that my daughter had lose weight. Her face is not that round and fluffy just like before. Her arms and legs were not that thick compared to before. And that's because I was not able to take care of her well during my anxiety days. I was too late to realize that I am slowly neglecting my daughter. Was I a bad mom already? For me, I already am because in the first place, I shouldn't be like this. I should not think of things that are beyond my control. I should focus on my family. Just yesterday, I started to fed Clea the way I fed her before. I am also thankful that my grandma is here to help unlike from my boyfriend's place.

See these are just few out of the many things that my mind ruined. Some might say I am just acting up and I can get through this easily. Believe, I already tried a hundred times but there are just days I can't control my own thoughts. I guess if this still persists, I might have anxiety disorder which I don't like to happen.

I know we can't avoid not to overthink sometimes and that's fine. What makes it not fine is when we do it a hobby, an everyday activity. Dear friends, again, please take care of your mental health. Yes, there are a lot of medicines that can make us feel better but there's no medicine that can cure overthinking. There's no medicine that can control our minds.

Always be well. Stay hydrated. Eat on time. Sleep early or have enough sleep.

Be with people who matters.

Above all, talk to God. It's the most powerful way that I tried. And now, I am feeling better and better.

Thank you fam for supporting me. I may not be able to respond immediately but I promise I'll make it up when I have the time. Thanks to my sponsors and to those people who upvote my posts. You guys are big help.

Ciao! ❤️