Moment unforgettable

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4 years ago

Dad was a naturopathic Doctor whereas mum is a nurse, but she never practiced instead she had a pharmacy. They both met at Med school. They were the ideal couple. A role model to many marriages - I have seen lots of couples come to them for advice and reconciliation.

Not once have I heard them quarrel or fight. Perhaps they'd when we are away? If they did, we would have heard from neighbours who envied their union.

Trusting relatives with the family's businesses was the worst decision we ever made. They squandered all we left to their care. We returned to debts - rents for two shops and a house. We still had school fees and medical bills to take care of.

There was a time I would have dropped out of school to assist mom in taking care of dad and seeing to the family's needs and taking care of my siblings' education. But that didn't happen, thanks to two angels - My lovely aunts.

I guess family can make or break us.

He didn't see it coming

Dad was a doctor, takes care of people, give medical advice, and encourage people to take up a healthy lifestyle to stay healthy. Why didn't he see this coming? How did he miss this?

He had a stroke! One he never recovered from till his death - got stroke in 2011 and died 29th October 2017.

6 years! Years of treatment - loss memory, speech, use of one side of his body. And we lost almost everything the family has worked hard to build. A lot went to his medical bills, relatives squandered the rest.

From grace to grass

I was young and in school when this happened. Though I returned home when I got the news, I had to return to school after he was referred to a hospital in a different. We left the family's business and assets to relatives we shouldn't have trusted.

Though dad's medical bills took a lot of money. Also the tuition fees of my siblings and I. We came back to almost nothing. We had a supermarket and a pharmacy that were almost empty. The pharmacy was locked and the relative in charge was nowhere. The one managing the supermarket stayed, but couldn't offer much, blamed the fall on the money they had to send for bills and all. He left a few days later - months after that, he opened his shop and started a new house. Where did the money come from? Perhaps he won the lottery.

They left debts for mom. Rent for two shops and the residential house. Mom had to go to the family's reserve to pay up. The pharmacy was closed and mom decided to keep the shop because it was close to home. More challenges came, and the family became broke.

Our lives could have been worse, if not for the two angels in human form. They took care of my education and part of dad's medical bills. And we were able to live on.

A moment to forget

In 2014, dad was referred to a clinic. I had to go stay with him during this period. I was at home then because schools were closed due to the ASUU strike (Academic Staff Union of Universities). This strike lasted for about 3 months.

We stayed with one of my aunts - my dad's elder sister. I practically did everything for dad. Feeding, bathing, clothing, shaving, keeping him company, and ... I had no me time. Although with time he learned to use the other hand to eat and do some little things himself, I still had to be there and assist. Something g I enjoyed found and never complained.

One day, dad was sleeping and I left to buy some shaving stick. As we had exhausted the one I bought and his beards were grown and rough. And also buy other stuff we might need. I told my cousin to help me keep a close eye on him, in case he wakes and wants to urinate or so.

I walked to the shop not too far from the house. There I met some childhood friends, they invited me to join them, I hesitated at first, but later decided to go relax a bit with them. Twenty minutes later, a neighbor rushed to meet me, crying, asking me to run home immediately.

I feared the worst. I ran like never before. I got home to a crowd, my cousin crying, holding unto my father on the flow. I walked close, my heart raising, I found him almost lifeless on the floor. I took him from her arms into mine, calling unto him

Dad! Dad!! Dad don't you leave me yet.

I looked into his eyes, and they were all white, his pupils were not to be seen. Then he started having seizures like he was at the brink of death. He was actually battling with death, trying to hold on. Seeing him like this, I wept!

Some minutes later his doctor arrived. Gave some treatment. And in some minutes the seizures stopped and I could see his pupils again. A little relief. The doctor had to leave as it was already dark and he had a long way to get home.

We didn't get any sleep that night. Few hours after the doctor left. The seizures started, and a repeat of all that happened earlier. We experienced episodes of this, like every 2-3 hours. Well, he pulled it through the night - the worst night of my life.

By morning, we got him to the hospital for examination and treatment. He got better after some days of testing and treatment. We were later discharged.

What happened?

He fell down while coming out to urinate, guess he called out and no one answered. He came out on his own, probably lost balance and slipped, falling to the ground.

Where was I? If only I didn't go out? If I had just bought what I needed and returned home.

The incident affected his recovery. He regressed and I had to start teaching him to do most of the things he already learned to do.

I still blame myself for that day's incident. If only I didn't sit to relax a bit. As I typed this, the incident became fresh in memory, and I couldn't help but let out some tears. I miss him.

May his soul rest in peace. RIP Dad.


You can also share your memories here - good or bad.

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4 years ago

Comments

That was a great and safe memory to share. People who were trusted were not of help and in return at times if misery there was nothing left behind. Great entry.

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4 years ago

I shed tears by reading your story.. I was hooked by it feeling I'm in your shoes. Good for you, you were there when he needed you most. I salute you for being a good son.

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4 years ago

hi dear plz subscrip and like coment u saport me and see bak son sapot u plz plz plz sapot

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4 years ago

Hi, your life story was so very sad, a very tough life journey. Just always remember what brings us to tears, will lead us to grace. Our pain is never wasted. Your family manage to overcome with it, yes just give thanks to your aunts they are truly like an angel. Sometimes life decision depends on our future. You can join your friends and eat with them, relax, and talk many things. Sometimes it takes sadness to know happiness, noise to appreciate silence and absence to value presence.

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4 years ago

Sad stories. But I like to read this story. More story please..

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4 years ago

Hello, so how about the sponsoring. Did you choose the posts?

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4 years ago

This so sad. I have my eyes misty. I missed my dad, he is also in god's arms. We should show our love to our parent while the are still with us.

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4 years ago

It's really a heart touching story. I couldn’t held my tear in my eyes. Rip.

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4 years ago

সবাইকে অভিবাদন.

আজ আমি একটি অনুপ্রেরণামূলক নিবন্ধ শেয়ার করব। আমি মনে করি আপনারা সবাই আমার এই নিবন্ধটি পছন্দ করেন irst প্রথমবারের মতো আমি এই ধরণের নিবন্ধটি লেখার চেষ্টা করি। সুতরাং আমি যদি কোনও ভুল করি তবে আমার ভুলটি ক্ষমা করুন।

মানুষের জীবনে আশা থাকলে হতাশাও থাকে। আপনি একটি জিনিস নিয়ে বাঁচতে পারবেন না। চারদিক থেকে জীবনকে স্বীকার করে, একজনকে শিক্ষা নিতে হবে বা ভিক্ষা করতে হবে। শিখতে না পারলে ভিক্ষা করতে হবে। এই শিক্ষাদান এবং ভিক্ষাবৃত্তিতে সুস্পষ্ট কিছু ব্যথা আপনাকে আরও উন্নত করার পাশাপাশি দুর্নীতিগ্রস্ত করতে পারে।

আপনি যখন বিবর্তিত হবেন, আপনার চারপাশের প্রত্যেকে আপনাকে তাদের প্রয়োজনের বস্তু তৈরি করবে, তবে আপনি যদি তাদের প্রত্যাশা অনুসারে বিবর্তিত না হয়ে দুর্নীতিগ্রস্থ হন, তবে তাদের পরিবর্তে, আপনারাই কী করেছেন এবং কী অর্জন করেছেন তা প্রত্যেকেই দেখতে চাইবে।

আজকের সমাজে মানুষ কোয়ালিটির দিকে চেয়ে, কোয়ালিটির নয়।

আপনি যদি কোনও কারণে ভোগেন তবে কেউ আপনার দুর্ভোগ লাঘব করতে আসবে না।

আপনি যদি কোনও কারণে ব্যথা হন তবে কেউ সেই ব্যথার উপর মলম লাগাতে আসবে না।

আপনি যদি কোনও কারণে ব্যর্থ হন তবে আপনি কেন ব্যর্থ হয়েছেন তা কেউ আপনাকে জিজ্ঞাসা করবে না তবে আপনাকে ব্যর্থ হয়েছে বলে মনে করিয়ে দেবে।

আপনি যখন ভেঙে পড়বেন, তখন কেউ আপনাকে কাঁধে নিয়ে বলবে না, "আমি এখানে আছি you আপনি যতক্ষণ সফল, উদীয়মান, শক্তিশালী, ইত্যাদি ততক্ষণ আপনার জীবন সুন্দর etc. আপনার যতক্ষণ আগুন জ্বলবে ততক্ষণ লোকেরা তেল পোড়াবে।

কেউ এসে আপনার জন্য আপনার জীবন গড়বে না Y হ্যাঁ, কেউ যদি একটি সুন্দর জীবন গড়ার পথে আপনার অংশীদার হতে সক্ষম হতে চায় B কারণ আপনি আপনার দুটি হাত দিয়ে যা কিছু করেন, আপনি উভয় হাত দিয়ে উঠতে পারেন।

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4 years ago

I know how much one has to suffer when a family member become I'll. Specially whom, who care for us the most who maintain our family. Feeling sorry for you hearing your father's death. 😔😔😔😔

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4 years ago

How a good great story....

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4 years ago

Its very sad. But please don't blame yourself.

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4 years ago

Why is it that deaths and sufferings become the memories that seem so unforgettable to humans. My condolences to your family although it's quite late to do so already

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4 years ago

My condolences, I understand your words perfectly and I accompany you in your feelings. I also lived something similar with my father, he suffered 3 strokes in a row but thank God he managed to recover 90%, over time his partner abandoned him for another man and he fell into depression, his health began to deteriorate very quickly, my Older siblings and I took turns looking after him but it didn't last long because he died after 3 months. In October he will be 9 years old since his departure, I still need it :-(

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4 years ago

I have read full of your story. You loved your dad so much ❤️. In 2010 I also my father has passed away when I was just 8 years old. And after that till now I am with my mother. I don't drop out from education yet. My mother is nurturing me yet. So, it too hurts to me that I can't help my mother financially. Your writing skills was so much good. I wish I could also have this skills one time. 🙂

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4 years ago

I relate with you. Having mom work hard to take care of the family. Now I have grown, it's my responsibility as the first child. I wish you and tour mom all the best.

My writing is not good yet. I am still working on improving. You can also do better if you put your heart to it.

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4 years ago

Great Story, continue writing and inspired others

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4 years ago

It's so sad story, especially that you'd trusted people but they broke your trusts, though it's also heartwarming, knowing how you love and care for your father. I just want to tell you to stop blaming yourself. I know that's hard, but you didn't also want that to happened--you didn't expected. Another thing, do you think your father will be happy in heaven if he knows that you're still blaming yourself because of his death--or what if he can't go to heaven because you still blame yourself? It's not your fault, it's his time. Maybe, God needed someone like him, so he get him. I know that will be hard for you, but don't just think about how you feel, because your father will never be happy until you keep on blaming yourself, for you MUST not.

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4 years ago

Well, he didn't die from that fall. He lived another three years before his death. I blamed myself for making him pass through that ordeal. That fall probably complicated issues. Though that was never confirmed, but I knew within it caused him more pain.

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4 years ago

But I wish you take my advice. Even if it's hard for you until now. You must stop blaming yourself.

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4 years ago

Nice article

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4 years ago

I know how it feels when someone you trust breaks your trust towards them

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4 years ago

It's so sad, but stop blaming your self because nothing like that happened to your dad because it was just an accident. I hope you can forgive yourself because that will not be good for yourself and the future.

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4 years ago

Well, I have to. I can't keep living in guilt. After his death I was so bitter. If that incident hadn't happened maybe he would have lived longer.

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4 years ago

wao

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4 years ago

Jesus! This is a very touching story, I'm so sorry for your loss mate! Dad's like yours are rare and when something like this happens your relatives supposed to be the next in line, why would greed blind one's eye. It is well mate, we move brother! This isn't the stop, cheer up mate!

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4 years ago

Well, its been 3 years since his death and we have come so far. We will forever miss him, and he will remain in memory.

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4 years ago

That's the spirit bro, bless up!

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4 years ago

This is so sad. I believe it's valid to feel regret because things would have turn out differently if it wasn't the decision you made. But hey, your dad must be so grateful for having such a caring son like you. Let's just think that he's no longer in pain and got rid of the suffering. For sure he's there watching over the family.

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4 years ago

Hey there, thank you for your kind words. Yes, things would have turned out differently if I left immediately I bought what we needed.

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4 years ago

It is a sad story but you should not have feelings of guilt. Things happen because they must. The "would have been" no longer exists. Try to remember everything you gave him without reproaching anything. It is what should strengthen your heart. Not many children give their lives gratefully to their parents. And you had that happiness of doing it.

I am also a doctor. Life has touched me very hard. I'll write about it sometime.

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4 years ago

I can't help the guilt, I can't help the thought. Though recently it seldom comes to me. Thanks though for your advice. I look forward to reading your story

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4 years ago

Yes, I understand that you can't help but feel guilty. I understand why I lived with that feeling for a long time, but then I learned what I know now. Guilt brings you a great weight that you must learn to release. You just wanted to extend the life of a loved one. that in case you didn't help him, he would have followed the normal course towards death. But you helped him preserve life! And God gave you the opportunity to do it. But when he reached the limit of his life, God occupied you with other things so that you would allow him to go to meet the other life, or to meet God. I hope you understand what I want to tell you. We are nothing, just instruments. Be Happy!!

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4 years ago

Great Story, i like to read stories like this

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4 years ago

I can't help by cry as I read, my dad's death is recent and i do have some regrets.

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4 years ago

Well, can I say welcome to the club of fatherless people. May he rest in peace. And may you have the fortitude to bear his loss.

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4 years ago

So very touching story of yours. Maybe it's your dads time to go. And God have plans for you. Be strong enough to face that God has given you. I know you can make it. Thanks for sharing this sad but memorable story.

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4 years ago

Teary eye while reading your article. But don't blame yourself, maybe it's your dad's time. God has plans for everything that happens in our lives. Be strong for your mom and your siblings. God bless friend, Be strong.

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4 years ago

Thank you dear. I have been strong. But sometimes in the silence of my room. Those thoughts come back to me. And I end up crying at times. But I don't let any one see me that way.

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4 years ago