Dad was a naturopathic Doctor whereas mum is a nurse, but she never practiced instead she had a pharmacy. They both met at Med school. They were the ideal couple. A role model to many marriages - I have seen lots of couples come to them for advice and reconciliation.
Not once have I heard them quarrel or fight. Perhaps they'd when we are away? If they did, we would have heard from neighbours who envied their union.
Trusting relatives with the family's businesses was the worst decision we ever made. They squandered all we left to their care. We returned to debts - rents for two shops and a house. We still had school fees and medical bills to take care of.
There was a time I would have dropped out of school to assist mom in taking care of dad and seeing to the family's needs and taking care of my siblings' education. But that didn't happen, thanks to two angels - My lovely aunts.
I guess family can make or break us.
He didn't see it coming
Dad was a doctor, takes care of people, give medical advice, and encourage people to take up a healthy lifestyle to stay healthy. Why didn't he see this coming? How did he miss this?
He had a stroke! One he never recovered from till his death - got stroke in 2011 and died 29th October 2017.
6 years! Years of treatment - loss memory, speech, use of one side of his body. And we lost almost everything the family has worked hard to build. A lot went to his medical bills, relatives squandered the rest.
From grace to grass
I was young and in school when this happened. Though I returned home when I got the news, I had to return to school after he was referred to a hospital in a different. We left the family's business and assets to relatives we shouldn't have trusted.
Though dad's medical bills took a lot of money. Also the tuition fees of my siblings and I. We came back to almost nothing. We had a supermarket and a pharmacy that were almost empty. The pharmacy was locked and the relative in charge was nowhere. The one managing the supermarket stayed, but couldn't offer much, blamed the fall on the money they had to send for bills and all. He left a few days later - months after that, he opened his shop and started a new house. Where did the money come from? Perhaps he won the lottery.
They left debts for mom. Rent for two shops and the residential house. Mom had to go to the family's reserve to pay up. The pharmacy was closed and mom decided to keep the shop because it was close to home. More challenges came, and the family became broke.
Our lives could have been worse, if not for the two angels in human form. They took care of my education and part of dad's medical bills. And we were able to live on.
A moment to forget
In 2014, dad was referred to a clinic. I had to go stay with him during this period. I was at home then because schools were closed due to the ASUU strike (Academic Staff Union of Universities). This strike lasted for about 3 months.
We stayed with one of my aunts - my dad's elder sister. I practically did everything for dad. Feeding, bathing, clothing, shaving, keeping him company, and ... I had no me time. Although with time he learned to use the other hand to eat and do some little things himself, I still had to be there and assist. Something g I enjoyed found and never complained.
One day, dad was sleeping and I left to buy some shaving stick. As we had exhausted the one I bought and his beards were grown and rough. And also buy other stuff we might need. I told my cousin to help me keep a close eye on him, in case he wakes and wants to urinate or so.
I walked to the shop not too far from the house. There I met some childhood friends, they invited me to join them, I hesitated at first, but later decided to go relax a bit with them. Twenty minutes later, a neighbor rushed to meet me, crying, asking me to run home immediately.
I feared the worst. I ran like never before. I got home to a crowd, my cousin crying, holding unto my father on the flow. I walked close, my heart raising, I found him almost lifeless on the floor. I took him from her arms into mine, calling unto him
Dad! Dad!! Dad don't you leave me yet.
I looked into his eyes, and they were all white, his pupils were not to be seen. Then he started having seizures like he was at the brink of death. He was actually battling with death, trying to hold on. Seeing him like this, I wept!
Some minutes later his doctor arrived. Gave some treatment. And in some minutes the seizures stopped and I could see his pupils again. A little relief. The doctor had to leave as it was already dark and he had a long way to get home.
We didn't get any sleep that night. Few hours after the doctor left. The seizures started, and a repeat of all that happened earlier. We experienced episodes of this, like every 2-3 hours. Well, he pulled it through the night - the worst night of my life.
By morning, we got him to the hospital for examination and treatment. He got better after some days of testing and treatment. We were later discharged.
What happened?
He fell down while coming out to urinate, guess he called out and no one answered. He came out on his own, probably lost balance and slipped, falling to the ground.
Where was I? If only I didn't go out? If I had just bought what I needed and returned home.
The incident affected his recovery. He regressed and I had to start teaching him to do most of the things he already learned to do.
I still blame myself for that day's incident. If only I didn't sit to relax a bit. As I typed this, the incident became fresh in memory, and I couldn't help but let out some tears. I miss him.
May his soul rest in peace. RIP Dad.
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That was a great and safe memory to share. People who were trusted were not of help and in return at times if misery there was nothing left behind. Great entry.