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Battling my mind for a week

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Avatar for Lazysnail
Written by ย ย 195
5 months ago

Saturday rest day, it's the 29th day days of the month of January 2022. The first month is about to come end so fast. Be ready for the valentine's day. Do you have your Valentine?

Though, I look like I'm happy but I'm not. Yes I am? I think I am. But I'm not, I don't know which is which but one thing for sure. I'm battling my mind for a week. Just like every morning, I don't drink coffee or milk or any cereals drink. I even sometimes miss my breakfast. It's because every time I wake up. I feel bored, and tired all the time.

Sleep Deprivation

It's been a week when my insomnia started to attack again. I finish every chores of mine and lay in my bed at 9:00 pm. But I can't fall into sleep. My mind is getting out of this world. I'm just using my phone scrolling on social media. Feeling nothing at all, not even smiling or anything. I can't sleep, it's hard to fall asleep. I'm awake even Until 2:00 -3:00 am. And immediately wake up at 7:00 am or 8:00 am in only having 4-5 hours of sleep every night. Maybe this is the reason of everything, I don't really know. Having a bad sleeping routine makes me tardy most of the time.

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Mental fight

I don't know what to call it. But I feel like, I'm having an excessive moodswing and I'm having an anger issue. Sometimes, I feel nothing, sometimes I feel happy but most of the time I'm sad and feel irritated. Because of this I feel like not talking to anyone around me. I used to be alone but not lonely but today I'm feeling both of them. I procastinate a lot especially when I start overthinking and stuffs. That's why I kept myself from being pre-occupied so that I won't start overthinking. People around me is being affected and I know its bad. I'm having a bad headache, I'm feeling weightless and my hands are shaking. I'm not depressed or anything, I don't think I am. Because I actually have no big problems in my life. Everything are just from my thinking. I kept on thinking stuffs and making problems that doesn't exist in the first place. I wanted to stop it but I can't.

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I wanted to go to somewhere free, something I know no one. Like in the beach where I am alone just me and the beach one on one, all my thoughts will be washed like a water in the waves. I wanted to breath somewhere. I wanted to explore something new, talk with new people, but my body is stopping me to do so. I just wanted to escape for a little bit but I can't because my parents will worry about me. I don't wanted to tell it to anyone. I don't wanted to feel weak in their perspective. I am lazysnail, a man, a smart,strong, independent, cool man. I need to stay mt figure into all of their eyes.

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Closing Thoughts

Hello hello there my fellow readers and writers Its me once again your lazy writer lazysnail, I'm sorry for this article is full of rants of Thoughts. This is the only place I could say freely of what I'm thinking, but like few days ago until yesterday I'm also hesitant to do it. That's why I put it in drafts yesterday but today I did it. I just say a part of what I'm thinking. That's all, I'm sorry and I hope you can manage your own fight!.

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Written by ย ย 195
5 months ago
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Comments

That is so difficult but I know you can overcome them. Better days will come, you deserve to smile and be happy again. Also, I suggest you to watch or listen to ASMR or Binaural Audios of haircut, head or ear massage or skincare before you sleep, they might help you to fall asleep.

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5 months ago

I'll try to follow your tips ma'am. Thank you for it. I do appreciated every bit of what you have said

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5 months ago

I pray you soon get rid of this insomnia, and all your stress go away to make you feel better. You should definitely plan to spend a day at beach.

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5 months ago

I'm actually planning to be on the beach before this month end but my schedule is really full

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5 months ago

Aigoooo, nag iisip ka rin siguro talaga ng wagas bata kaya ganyan. I know na di maiiwasan talaga na mag isip pero, if masama ang dulot sayo mejo bawasan ang sibra sobrang pag iisip na Basta fighting lanh ๐Ÿฅฐ๐Ÿฅฐ

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5 months ago

Though you can't sleep early you should put your phone far away from you and try to sleep, coz often the radiation of mobile screen resist the flow of our melatonin hormone that's why we often suffer from insomnia. Try to follow a fixed routine , it will definitely help you.

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5 months ago

I'm doing that for like an hour or even couple of hours but still I can't fall asleep. I wanted to go back to normal lol

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5 months ago

Your thoughts is your main concern, just refresh your mind and hangouts where you like to enjoy yourself and good in sleeping will follow after that.

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5 months ago

I just can't. I don't know where to go, and our place is on alert level 3. So it's restricted to go to some places..

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5 months ago

Ahh I see, only you yourself is the key how to get out that situation just think about something that will make your mind busy

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5 months ago

I feeeeel you siss๐Ÿฅบ silent battle within in my mind! Thats true! Moodswings really hold us wherein it makes us annoyed easily when people talk to us. It really affects day by day.๐Ÿ˜”๐Ÿ˜”

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5 months ago

Ww don't wanted to spill it with people around us because they might think of us as weak or overreacting. We're just waiting for the problem to pass away

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5 months ago

I have also mental problems but I keep fighting on it, I focus myself on the goals that I need to accomplish that's why I woke up every morning to do my daily routine like jogging in BGC or play with friends on Arca. Sometimes I prefer to be alone and I want to unwind by jogging up to the center of BGC then gonna stay on vast green field while listening to the music on my tablet. You can accompany me if you have time, we can jog or play together in BGC or in Arca if you want.โคโค

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5 months ago

I actually think of chatting you this past few days. I wanted to come with your jogging or even play badminton. But a thought enter my mind that I might irritating you, or that maybe I'm disturbing you. I actually wanted to, but next week will be my hellday. We are preparing for midterm examination. I'll chat you for sure if I can come

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5 months ago

I hope you will be better soon. I think your mental fight is what causing you insomnia. I hope you'll manage your stress because it has serious side effects in the future.

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5 months ago

I don't know if my sleep deprivation causing my mental fight or if my overthinking causing me to have insomnia

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5 months ago

I understand your Feelings. Itโ€™s hard to get out of these. Hope you may get out of these soon.

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5 months ago

I know you're feeling the same as mine brother, hoping this problem to pass away. After some time.

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5 months ago