Ingredients of a strong relationship: Time
Time is the greatest gift you can give another person. After all everything else fades away, breaks, wears out; but those memories and times you spent together will live on forever.
All around the world, people come together to form bonds with one another. They lay aside their differences, cultures, traditions, color and age and come together to appreciate one another. Even though it is speculated that racism and color superiority is widely practiced, yet friendship bonds and even marriages are been established between people from different race and continent. But apart from creating bonds and relationships, there are some things that are needed to keep the relationship alive and strong. I will talk on the first one tonight and subsequently take the others in the coming series.
Time; the live wire of relationships
There was a case of divorce brought to the table of a lawyer. The husband was furious and was demanding for the dissolution of the marriage immediately. The woman on the other hand was quiet and sober. When the lawyer asked what the basis of the divorce was, the man said the woman was caught having an extra marital affairs with a neighbor. On hearing this the judge faced the woman and asked her why she did what she did. With tears in her eyes and pain in her voice she responded saying 'I was alone!'.
Now, I don't support immorality and adultery or cheating in any relationship, but we will be deceiving ourselves if we don't attend to issues regarding spending time with or loved one.
As much as money and other material things are important in a relationship, it value can never be compared to that of the attention and time we give to our loved ones. Since relationship is a matter of the heart, it can only be sustained and strengthened by investing time into it.
Note:
Anybody you give your attention to, you have given that person a portion of your time and invariably a portion of your life!
Since living is dependent on the time we have spent on this Earth, hence if I give you my time, I have given a portion of my life that I cannot recover. The only thing you can dovo appreciate it (not to return it) will be to reciprocate the same.
In relationship, there 4 major pillars supporting and determining the longetivity. The first being love or likeness as the case maybe. It the most important, Followed by time. When God created man in the garden of Eden, God didn't live them and command man to do the seeking alone. No! Rather, he created friendship with the man by regularly visiting him in the garden. In fact it in the course of visiting and interacting with him that he got to know that the man was feeling lonely despise him (being God) was there!
So also it is with us. If God had to interact and spent time with man to discover his pain, don't you think it is expedient that we do same for each other. Back to the case shared above, the woman had actually being feeling lonely and needy for a long time, by the husband wasn't aware. He didn't know her pain, didn't have time to share in her joy and sadness, couldn't provide the basis of companionship which is communication. Then the result was him indirectly pushing the woman out into sin. The neighbor may have been giving the woman some needed attentions and all other things thereby, creating space for the devil to penetrate.
Hence, my candid advise for all the singles out there is; if you won't create time for your wife and family, don't bother to tie the knot. You may have all the other necessary materials to make your family comfortable, if you won't create time for your family, you are not yet ready. Go and learn the act of creating Time for your family. Many marriages are in turmoil, in war and full of sins and quarrels because the spouses lack the act of spending time and giving attention to their loved ones. Many children today get involved in illegal acts because of the lack of supervision from their parents. Some parents are even so audacious that they leave the training and discipline of their wards to the hands of nannys and teachers. The result is unpleasant behaviors and thinking the children. I guess you only get as much as you give. Hence, if you are not ready to receive baad attitudes or disappointment from your children, give them your time.
Time to make friends
I once read from an article written by @Danika where he was talking about friendship that, the best way if making good friends is being a good friend yourself. Some people say they are not being checked upon, or that their friends don't care for them, or that their friends are selfish and self centered. In most cases, if one should have a good knowledge of these people, they themselves don't know how to create time and attention for their friends and as I have said you only receive as much as you give.
For those that love staying indoors, try move out of your closet sometimes, meet people, make friends and when you find those friendship invaluable, give it your time and attention. Best friends are not made by meeting once or twice, it is made by consistent interaction and large amount of time investment.
Thanks for reading this article, I hope you found it helpful. Don't forget to hit the 👍 button. See you soon friends