How well do you know your friends? How strong is the bond that connects even the tiniest strand of your hair with theirs? What makes you understand one another by just merely staring with each other’s naked eyes? I bet you’ve already experienced these with your “pakners en kraym”. You’re smiling because you can relate? Then all of a sudden, you remember them. The crazy folks who influenced you to do the things you never tried before, and the noisy ones who never let you experienced being a loner. Not anymore!
But what if difficult circumstances arise? Imagine that you and your friends are drifting in the ocean. The huge waves are pushing you towards the middle of the dreadful sea and you cannot do anything but to go on with the wild blow of the freezing air. Would you risk your life for them?
To attain a friendship of forever, perhaps these words can shed light.
1. Talk
When misunderstandings occur, never last a day without talking about it. The longer the problem, the harder it takes to be resolved. If you wait until you’re ready, you will be waiting for the rest of your life.
2. Complement
Nobody’s perfect but you can be perfect together. Friendship is not only hanging out together. It is how you complete each other’s well-being. There will be no imperfections when you are united as one.
3. Forgive and forget
The ideal formula is simply forgive + forget = love and peace. Forgive the people who hurt you and caused pain in your heart. Forget about what had happened and start a new one with love and peace of mind. It’s just the chapter that has ended, not the whole book.
4. Secrets
Sometimes, one of the reasons why good friends quarrel is because some secrets are not being kept by one person or the other. Thus, developing the sense of betrayal and a feeling of hatred and disappointment. When people feel like they are being stabbed in the back, they tend to create a gap that breaks the bond.
5. Trust
Show them that you are worthy to be trusted. Make them feel comfortable as they share the story of their lives to you. Trust is like a piece of paper, once it is crumpled, you can never bring it back to its original state again. When someone’s trust has been betrayed, it’s very impossible to regain it no matter how hard you work for it. So when your friends trust you, never take it for granted.
6. Effort
When you feel like everything is ruined by a simple misunderstanding, always remember that your friendship started with an extraordinary effort. Thus, it wouldn’t last if that effort will be kept as time goes by. Effort to humble yourself and lessen your pride. Pride is a detergent not an attitude. (Sorry, the writer is fond of eating corn. If you know what I mean.)
7. Time
The most precious element in this world is your time. When it passes by, you can never go back and change what had happened. So live it well. Even when you found the person whom you want to spend the rest of your life with, don’t forget to still spend time with your friends. Admit it that when you are happy with your love life, you message them once a week or not at all. But when your heart is broken, their inboxes are full because of your unending dramas. Friends are much better than boy/girlfriends. (From the writer’s point of view; bitterness alert!)
8. Initiative
The first to approach are the humble ones. Don’t wait until Christmas or New Year before you solve your problems. Make the first move in order for you not to prolong the issue. Patience is a virtue but life is short.
9. God
Put the Supreme Being from heavens above as the center of your friendship. Pray for the wellness of each other and make the Church as your “meeting place” (not literally) instead of going to shopping malls and parks. The authentic realm of forever is in the hands of the Almighty Father. (kaya may forever!)
10. Focus
Keep your concentration to the preceding words and you’ll find the ones that are worthy to be focused on. Keep calm and treasure your “pakners en kraym”.
Just like in the sea of life, the relationship you have with your friends is the foundation of an extraordinary bond that serves as your boat. The sea exemplifies your journey towards success. The huge waves are the obstacles and hindrances that you meet along your way. The wild air signifies the misunderstandings that will surely happen within your group. But whatever it may be; always remember that it will always be worth it in the end. The choice is yours to choose and no one else's. Would you let your friendship sink?
I'll keep you. <3 (Fond of eating corn, too! HAHA!)