This post is going to be a somewhat (I hope) educational post for those who have no clue about what I'm talking about, and as positive reinforcement for those who are getting it right.

What's the p-word? Period. Otherwise known as menstruation - a thing that happens once a month that is extremely painful for some women, and for others, they hardly even notice it. I am one of those unfortunate women who suffer with severe pain once a month - to the point that I used to end up collapsing from the pain (hospitalized twice). Thankfully I haven't had a hospital trip for a long time now, however, I still suffer with it.

Men and women need to read this

I grew up in an atmosphere where I was always able to express myself openly about anything, and because of that, in our house we do not have things that we "must not talk about". Also, because of this - I have a Fiancé who has no shame in walking through the door with a bottle of red wine under one arm, a chocolate cake in the one hand and a box of tampons under the other arm. Women support men, and men support women - in different ways.

My parents have always known how much I suffer with my periods and because of it they have been extremely helpful during the very bad days. My Dad has always been there to help at 2am (or whatever unholy time it starts) and gets up, boils the kettle to make me a hot water and bottle, then shoves milk into the microwave for me so I can take my pain tablets. Why is it so hard for men and women to speak about these things to each other? Why is there a taboo about speaking about a thing that happens to a woman? What is wrong with society?

I do understand that coming from a medical background it is probably easier for me because I regularly ask people about the consistency of their stools (for example), however, that doesn't negate the fact that people need to help each other. There will come a time in your life (as a man) when one day a woman is going to have her period and you will need to help her in some way.

Advice for Parents

When you become parents and your daughter starts to grow older, make sure you are both helping her out in every way possible. Mum's, make sure Dad knows what he needs to buy if he turns up to pick your little girl up from school one day and she says, "I've got my period". My Mom had done this - that's exactly what happened to me when I was 12.

Dad's, when your daughter is too shy (and sore) to go in and buy tampons / pads because it's her first period and you end up being the one to pick her up from school that day - go buy her what she needs. I was fortunate - my Dad did this.

I see and hear so much shame about a woman and her cycle and it is appalling that in the 21st century we are unable to deal with discussions relating to human anatomy and bodily functions.

Parents, please speak to your children as they grow up about what periods are. Do you know that your son could be the cause of years of misery for a girl who gets her period for the first time at school? If your son hasn't been educated on how to help a girl who has either had an accident and has a bloody school dress / is her first time and she didn't even know it's happened, what will your son do? Call a teacher? Point and laugh (as they did at my school)? Why not teach your son to speak to the girl and be gentle about it?

"Alice, I think you've just got blood on your dress, here's my jacket." and let her tie it around herself so she can maintain some dignity.

The same for other girls - teach your daughters to help each other out. Explain to them what is going on and if another little girl has a problem how to help her. Don't add to the stigma of a natural bodily function.

Advice for Relationships

Ladies, TALK to your partners...if they don't know what you're going through and you don't talk to them about it, they can't do anything to help you. I heard a great saying from my Fiancé, "My balls are hairy not crystal" how is your partner supposed to know how to help if you don't express yourself?

Gents, you're annoyed because you were hoping to get lucky and she tells you, "I can't I have a headache" or "I can't I have my period". I guarantee you that you will be more likely to get lucky at the end of her period if you've treated her well and been sensitive to what's going on with her during it.

Ladies, stop hiding your feminine products from your partner - I'm not saying leave them on the kitchen counter, but why are you hiding them? There's nothing to be ashamed of.

Gents, please, pay attention to what your partner is buying / what is in the house. If she ever needs something and asks you to get it for her - get that one for her. Some women only use tampons, others use pads, some use the cups. We have certain brands that we use because (unfortunately) through trial and error we have figured out what fits our bodies, lifestyle and makes our hassles less. Just because it looks the same on the outside of the box and says something similar, doesn't mean it's going to work for us. If you're not sure, ask us. Please. We want your help, sometimes we need your help.

We feel rotten during that time of the month

Seriously - we would rather just turn into a wine-drinking-chocolate-eating monster than ever have to do anything ever again. We feel emotionally sensitive, bloated, unattractive, we are retaining water so you will probably have some sort of a fight with us because our jeans don't fit too well and we are insecure. We are likely annoyed because we have to choose our clothing-colours completely differently in case the tampon / pad has a mishap while we're at work. When we go to work we have to still be ourselves - nobody in most businesses care whether a woman is on her cycle or not and we are epically short tempered and abrupt during it. We are emotional to the point of sobbing (sometimes) for no good reason.

If you're with someone who suffers the way I do with the pain, the only way I can describe the pain to you is like the pain you feel after you are recovering from being kicked in your private-bits. We aren't able to just keep laying down on the floor clutching at them telling people to leave us alone though, we have to keep working and try not to lose our job while we are at it.

We feel utterly exhausted and drained. Many women are low on iron during menstruation as well, so we feel even more desire to just sit / lie down and do nothing.

Please don't be patronizing

Sometimes the odd "PMS" joke is funny, while we are lying down clutching at our stomachs hunched over with a hot water bottle waiting for pain medication to kick in - it's probably not the right time.

If we're moody - please consider how you would be feeling if your testicles were preparing to shed their inner-skin and we told you "oh, you're PMS'ing again". I don't think you would be very happy with us? When you've just been kicked you-know-where, you don't tend to want to be intimate, do you? We truly do not want to engage in sexual acts with you at these times either - unless the woman makes it blatantly obvious, the answer is no. No. No.

Lead image and above image by Pixabay User: Leuchtturm81

If you're a Man and are helping us...

Thank you! We do not say it often enough, and even if we do say thank you, it's still not enough. When you are soft, tender, understanding and gentle with us when we are an emotional thing from hell, it makes us love you even more. You are so appreciated, thank you.

Please get the conversations going!

There are far too many young girls who are terrified of periods, have no idea what they mean and are ostracised by their communities because of a NATURAL process that happens. This is just how we were built, why should people make others feel ashamed over it? Why shouldn't we speak about it? Why shouldn't we try to understand each other better!

The more we talk, the more we understand.