Who's to Blame in The Relationship?

I came across a question I saw on Twitter. Someone asked "who's to blame, the one who lacked in the relationship or the one who went away?".

And this got me thinking. Why do we experience failed relationships? Is it for us to get our hearts broken or it is for us to learn something out of it and focus on our personal growth?

To answer the question, this is based on my own perspective, the one to blame is the one who's not contented in the relationship. If there is no contentment in the relationship, then the relationship will never be enough.

The term "lack" is subjective. It depends on how you define it. Your actions and efforts may not be enough to the other person as you thought they would be. As a result, it causes misunderstanding and miscommunication.

Although putting blame does not always mean about productivity, its main focus is about finding whose fault it is rather than seeking solutions or personal growth.

Instead of assigning blame, it can be more helpful to reflect on the actions, choices, and behaviors of both individuals and consider how they may have contributed to the situation. This approach allows for personal growth, learning from mistakes, and finding ways to improve relationships and future interactions.

However, a part of me is also saying that one is responsible for the failed relationship. It actually depends on the situation. A case to case basis, to be exact.

For example, one is unaware that they lack effort and commitment to the relationship. One keeps doing such actions that causes chaos in the family. They're problematic, alcoholic, addicts and yet they believe that the family is still doing fine. They're not doing anything to make amends for it.

If one behaves like that, it's clearly recognizable that they're not fully committed to the relationship. They just don't care how it would make the other person feel about what they're doing. They know how it will affect big time to the relationship but they wouldn't mind doing so because they're no longer into the relationship that much anymore as to compared before.

It just hurts like hell when in the beginning of the relationship, you are both so passionate and committed to it. What difference does it do after so many years after?

And for sure, the one who went away must have endured everything before he/she has finally decided to let go of the relationship. Letting go is not an easy decision to make. It requires countless times of giving another chance to the person hoping it would work the next time around.

So for me, both sides should be considered. Putting blame against anyone would not make the relationship better. With constant open communication, contentment and commitment to the relationship, it'll be a harmonious one worth to cherish for.

Your thoughts about the question? I wanna know what's on your mind.

Thanks for reading.

Keep safe everyone!