Why do people cheat?

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Written by
4 years ago

Cheating is a problem that deals with emotional pain. I have encountered and read so many cases of people cheating. I have read poems and blogs of people about how painful it was for them to be cheated on. People are surprisingly very creative when it comes to their reasons for cheating. Cheating in a relationship includes so many factors. Texting or chatting with someone else that you keep secret to your love partner is already considered cheating. I once read that the only reason for you to keep a secret to your partner is when you are preparing a surprise for them. I forgot where I read that but it was true (for my opinion). Some say that without physical contact or whatnot is not considered cheating. And some say that it's the environment that makes them cheat or their nature and some say that it's peer pressure. I find it fascinating to hear some of their reasons especially those who say that it was their only way to solve a problem.

Let us tackle some reasons why people cheat in a relationship. It may not be the reason for some but I think these are some of the reasons.

Immaturity.

If they are still immature in handling a relationship and is if they still lack that maturity in their minds, people may not be ready for a serious relationship and they tend to cheat.

Insecurities

When a person is insecure he tends to be doing some immature things, cheating included. Some people feel like they're not good enough or that the other person. Too young, too old, too skinny, too fat, less fortunate or not rich enough, too bad for him/her, etc. Their insecurities sometimes lead to cheating. And to satisfy his/her ego, he/she finds validation to other people because they think of themselves as "not good enough" for their current partner.

Selfishness

As I said in my previous blogs, people are selfish by nature in some ways. Sometimes people are too selfish that they only consider themselves, they consider their own happiness, their own satisfaction, own benefits, and whatnot so they tend to start keeping secrets to you with no regret and eventually it leads to cheating.

Childhood abuse or life issues

The cheater must've encountered a trauma in his/her childhood that leads to an emotional impact in her life. The emotional, physical, and mental trauma that made him'her hard to commit in one person only or hard to just commit to a person. Life issues that lead to one's addictions like alcohol, drugs, and an outlet to their stress can lead to cheating. They think that talking to someone else is better especially when they get emotionally validated of the other person and eventually it will lead to a more intimate talk and possibly an intimate relationship. This opens us to our new reason,

Dissatisfaction and desire in diversity

When people have life issues and they want validation and you weren't able to give the validation they want, they look for other people for that validation. Or if some people have a desire in diversity, choices. They don't stick to one and tries different types of choices until they are satisfied.

Superiority

Some people think that they are better than others and that they deserve better than you. They think that they are very important and that you will never leave whatever happens and whatever they do. This feeling can lead to cheating because they think that even cheating is not enough reason to let go of someone like them... "the best" as what they think of themselves. Best you've ever had... So some people with this kind of attitude think they also think that they need someone that matches their character, someone special. He/she thinks he/she's unique and feels like they should reward themselves with a better lover that is also super duper special like them. (in Tagalog, mga mafeeling!)

Unrealistic expectations

People in relationship demand for things. Expect things. Sometimes our expectations are so unrealistic and it leads to dissatisfaction which also a reason why people cheat. When the person feels his needs are unmet, they look for other people to meet those desires and expectations. Sexual desire is one of the major things people have unrealistic expectations. Which leads us to our next reason

Desire for sex

Sexual desire can lead to a big problem that starts with cheating. Some people have sexual expectations with their partner and when they are not satisfied, some people find that desire to other people aside from their partner. Sexual desire is dangerous that one should be careful for. Some people are satisfied with their sexual expectations to their partner but because of their desire in variety in sex, they tend to cheat and look for others to fulfill their other desires in sex.

Anger/Revenge

Some people are emotional especially when they are mad or been hurt. Some people take revenge when they've been hurt and it results in cheating. For example, the cheater was hurt by her lover so he cheats her to get revenge. Another example, the cheater was always cheated on and decides to cheat every man he commits to get the satisfaction of revenge. Other people do cheating if they've been hurt by their partner and they want their partner to know that they are cheating to hurt their partner too.

Wants to end the relationship

People sometimes want the other person to break up with them so they cheat. Instead of telling you that they want to break up with you, they cheat so that when you find out, you will be the one to break up. Sometimes cheaters do this because they want to break up but they need to have someone on their life before they break up with you so they cheat first. Wanting to break up with you not necessarily means that he has just fallen in love with you, or maybe it does, but sometimes, people want to break up with you even when they still love you. Maybe we can talk about that in my future article.

Fallen out of love.

When a person has fallen out of love with you, that person wants to get out of the relationship or he can't so sometimes they think that cheating is the only way to solve their problem. Staying in a relationship for some reasons may result in cheating because they don't love you anymore and they think they don't have a choice but to cheat anymore.

Sometimes cheating is not in the mind of that person but with the given chance of the moment, they do it. And I personally think that's a weak character. being easily tempted in cheating. I don't tolerate cheating for any reason. But that's just me. We are all different. Some people give a chance to their partner. Maybe I can too, who knows, But as much as possible I wouldn't want to be in that kind of situation.

Thanks for reading my article hope this helps others in this kind of situation.

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Written by
4 years ago

Comments

Amazing

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4 years ago

There are a lot of reasons why people cheat. But nothing can justify it because they always have a choice.

PS. No hugot. Just sharing my opinion. :D

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4 years ago

Cheating is a choice, no matter how they justify it. As adults we already know what's good and bad.

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4 years ago

Maybe they are lack of attentions from their partner.

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4 years ago

Maybe,,,, That falls for "dissatisfaction" I guess

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4 years ago

Nowadays, everyone from companies to the game industry is cheating, I think the ambition to win a lot

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4 years ago

maybe...

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4 years ago

I reasoned with your points as to why people cheat on their partners, they are cogent. But I would like to mention a point which is equally important- self indiscipline. Some people are not self disciplined in relationship, hence they look elsewhere just for lust or fun. Thanks.

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4 years ago

wow that's a good point. that's true. Other's don't have self-discipline that's why they are easily tempted.. Nice thanks,.

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4 years ago

cheating is way too normalized in his generation, honestly. Makes me sad that I've been cheated on twice and i don't think anything could stop a person from cheating because of the normalization it's receiving and how it's even romanticized in a lot of films and literature

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4 years ago

true. Some people think that it's cute. And that you will be happy when you cheat without even realizing the effect to the person being cheated on. It's not easy being cheated on. You start to question your worth sometimes. And it's frustrating. I hope people will be more open to their feelings fo they won;t have to cheat.

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4 years ago

it's not about being open to feelings or anything, it's just the idea itself that "oh, it's not cheating if i don;t get caught" or the fact that being "friendly" seems to have overstepped its borders so one can't really tell whether it's already cheating or not

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4 years ago

And the mindset : "it's not cheating if we didn't have physical contact".. it will never be okay to be cheated on. ANd forgiving is yet another process after the pain. Some people just don't how its worth

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4 years ago

I wonder what people think of commitment now. We're getting sad here, sweets ๐Ÿ˜… no sad please, just good vibes only, you're gonna want to make me cuddle my dogs that still need a bath again

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4 years ago

hahaha don;t be sad. We sometimes need trials in our lives to make us strong. Not all cheaters are that bad. Some are also victims of their thoughts. Some didn't really want to do it but as human as we are, they still were tempted. That does not define them though. It defined their way of thinking during those times.

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4 years ago

I know. Behavior is the manifestation of the problem, after all but i don't know, sometimes i think people would need brain scans to even see what's wrong with how they think

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4 years ago

haha. We don't know. We can never know what they think and feel.

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4 years ago

How about cheating here in read.cash like copying other people's work and then translating it or blog posts to raise a fund for a family member or yourself and the likes but the truth is they are just lying to earn? Which reason/s will it falls? Haha just kidding. Nice article tho!

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4 years ago

Hmm. Under Insecurities maybe? They somehow feel that their writing ability is not good enough? ๐Ÿค” Haha.

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4 years ago

Hahahaha thanks for responding though I'm just kidding. But yeah I agree with that idea of yours.

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4 years ago

Haha I was talking about cheating in a relationship. haha but maybe that falls in IMMATURITY, INSECURITIES, SELFISHNESS AND LIFE ISSUES hahaha

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4 years ago

HAHAHAHA can't agree moreee! I was just kidding about the question but thanks for responding LOL. I've read an article about cheating in read.cash right before I read your post that's why I built that question hahaha

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4 years ago

oh I see haha.. That's fine..ehehe

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4 years ago

Well cheating is a common thing Because when the two couples don't have time for each other they start looking for someone else they can get along with cheating is a sin though but those who have cheated can make up for it by correcting their wrongs and those that were cheated on should always find ways to to forgive their partners

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4 years ago

maybe. But sometimes when they're always forgiven they do the same thing over and over again. Maybe they can be given second chances and that's it. IF they cheat again, no more chances.

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4 years ago

For me it's lust their lust and discontentment. And simple having no self restrictions when it comes to desires. Or fall out of love. Even a 10 years relationship can't last. Sometimes people do cheat in a cheap way that's where money well came.

When it comes to relationship both parties can cheat not just man but mostly are men. Sorry boy's ๐Ÿ˜‚. Some relationship end because of misunderstanding. This kind of relationship are locking of Trust. One of the strongest foundation of a relationship โค๏ธ. I can't believe I can say such thing while I can't do it ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ poor me.

RC Cola's โค๏ธโค๏ธโค๏ธ

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4 years ago

you can't trust? haha Yeah trust is one of the foundations of a relationship. So is respect, love and discipline.

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4 years ago

No matter what in life I don't believe that cheating have to be given a reason for it to occur. Infact, cheating takes more toll on the door than the person the doer is trying to hurt. He have to go through the stress of lying and emotional torment trying to hide from his partner. Not to mention consequences that will result from it.

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4 years ago

Everything happens for a reason, right?

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4 years ago

Thanks for the upvotes @hanzell and @jwolf!!

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4 years ago

you're welcome, sweets ^^

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4 years ago

Im my own experience, I cheated many times before I met my better half. As I was reading your article, I felt guilt. It was so me before I met my better half. Why I cheated? My reason were , we are on a long distance relationship , I found the time that I want to the other guy. I cheated because I feel so comfortable to the company of that guy forgetting that I have a boyfriend. I cheated because I am not contented. I always seek for the qualities that I love and my boyfriend dont have until I met a man who will teach me to be contented :)

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User's avatar Yen
4 years ago

That doesn't matter now. What matters is the present. AS long as you're not cheating now and you learned the lesson, it all fine now. Cheating may be really bad to the person being cheated on but cheaters have the ability to change. The ability to be more mature. I hope you learned you lesson and I hope you won't have any reasons to cheat now. :) cheaters won't know the effect while they're still cheating but after it's done, I hope that cheaters sincerely apologize and try as hard as they can not to do it again, whether on the existing partner or to another partner.

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4 years ago

They always say " once a cheater always a cheater "

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User's avatar Yen
4 years ago

That's not true. People change. Change is inevitable.

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4 years ago

I have been cheated before and the process of healing is awful. The feeling sucks and I hate it. I tried my best to avoid getting into depression and made so much diversions.

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4 years ago

I hope you are fine now. I mean, I'm sorry to hear that and I hope you get through it.

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4 years ago

Yup that was 10 years ago.. ๐Ÿ˜… I'm sharing my experience to encourage other who are going through tough times. I'd like to let the world know that we all have a choice.

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4 years ago

Yes and that time heals all wounds. In time, you will be able to accept the pain and forgive the person that cheated you. Eventually, you will move on.

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4 years ago

I experienced being cheated, all his reasons for me is not acceptable and I didn't accepted any.. For me, whatever the reason is, cheating is a sin.

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4 years ago

That's true. It is a sin. And acceptance depends on people. People do sins regularly. It's up to those who have been cheated on to whether accept it or not. And the feelings of those who were cheated on are valid.

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4 years ago

Cheating is always a sin and unacceptable but depends on being cheated if she/he is ready to forgive the cheater. But my advice to all is don't cheat.

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4 years ago

I was being cheated too. I have forgiven him. But it never faded till now. My only advice for all the cheater is "Don't cheat" this is the right thing to do, nothing else.

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4 years ago

I agree. Nothing can justify such actions. Don't cheat. That's it.

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4 years ago

Totally immoral and can never be disregarded. Mostly it happens not because a person from opposite gender deceives him/her but because there is a tendency to do so.

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4 years ago

Yeah. But that doesn't justify the sin, right?

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4 years ago

But that doesn't justify the sin, right?

Nothing can justify the sin no matter how shameful or sad the situation is...

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4 years ago

good. hehe.. I don't tolerate such actions too. I am not good in giving second chances when it comes to cheating. If my trust is broke, it's broke.

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4 years ago

Cheating is really bad and disloyal to your partner period.

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4 years ago

I agree. Cheating is not humane.

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4 years ago

Cheating is unacceptable to me. I donโ€™t like it. If someone try to cheat with me i leave him/her. Becouse itโ€™s so painful . It also damage our emotions. Cheating is a sin.

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4 years ago

It's nice to know that people don't allow themselves to be cheated on.

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4 years ago

Cheating is always a choice. No matter what the person's reasons are, it is always a choice. When cheaters say sorry, they are not sorry for cheating, they are sorry for getting caught. Uhh i hate cheaters. I mean, why cheat? Can't they just leave their current partner before going after other people? I mean, why do it all at the same time. Zz ๐Ÿ™„

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4 years ago

haha and sometimes being cheated on is a choice too. Some people allow their partners to cheat on them. And those don't allow their partners, that's good for them

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4 years ago

That is true!! Hahaha

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4 years ago

cheating realy is a big sin, this could only means incompetency in any matter and for what ever the reason its not worth cheating for

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4 years ago

right...

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4 years ago

There could be many reasons as you mentioned in the article, but none of them justifies cheating. It just destroys the lives of many

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4 years ago

Yes I agree... Whatever their reason may be, cheating will still be cheating and it is bad

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4 years ago