Join 100,427 users already on read.cash

How Did I Boost My Confidence?

31 72
Avatar for Jane
Written by Β Β 2058
2 months ago

|19th Nov 22|18:05|

I was too timid, shy, aloof, introverted, and whatever else you want to call me when I was younger, to the point where I don't even like socializing with my relatives and family members. My life seemed to revolve inside my cocoon. Even when I was able to speak, I felt like mute and hesitant to speak out.

This personality remained with me even as I grew older. The school was a real struggle for me. I detested oral class recitation the most. It was in secondary school, and we had a lot of oral recitation, and I always wanted the day to end quickly, wishing my teacher would call my other classmates instead of me. It's not that I didn't know the answer to the teacher's question; it's just that I lacked the confidence to face our class, and I doubted my answer as well, as I always did.

When my teacher calls my name, it seems like butterflies in my stomach flutter, and a trembling sensation spread from my auditory system to various parts of my body. My heart would beat so loudly and quickly that I couldn't hear my words anymore. My mouth would tremble, and I couldn't speak clearly because of my shaky voice. My face would become pale, and sweat would form on my brow. Seriously, when I'm at rest and just listening, my mind talks well, but when I pull my thoughts out when needed, they seem to be dispersed in the air, and I can't put them into the right words. And it would take some time to get back to normal.

In short, because of a lack of self-confidence, I frequently experience mental blocks and feel dead and cold in the middle of class. Except for my loud heartbeat, everything seems to go silent. I dislike reciting poetry or long phrases. I don't even like giving presentations in class about school projects and research because my mouth trembles when I'm nervous, lol.

During our last Thesis Defense in college, my heartbeat was louder than my voice throughout the presentation. Even taking deep breaths in and out and putting a coin in my shoe (as they claimed) didn't work. But I was still fortunate to be able to present our book, and our group eventually passed the defense.

I was full of dreams when I graduated from college and decided to enter the corporate world. I even hoped to advance to a higher position in the corporate world someday. However, those dreams were dashed due to a lack of self-confidence, particularly during job interviews. There were always a lot of what-ifs in my head, and I was always doubting my abilities.

Even phone interviews cause me to become nervous. I frequently asked myself, "WTH! Why are you so worried about a phone call?" Sometimes I just want to stop breathing in order to stop my heart from beating, but I can't.

I thought I wouldn't be able to work abroad when I first planned it. I didn't think I could live in a different world with people of different races. But, because I was determined to achieve my goals, I stepped out of my comfort zone and into the beehive.

Related article: An Introvert Stepped Out Of Cocoon To Beehive


How Did I boost my confidence?

Image created on Canva

During my years abroad, I somehow learned to socialize with others, mostly strangers. That is who I am. For some strange reason, I prefer to socialize with strangers rather than with people I know. When I talk to random strangers on the street, I don't feel like there are any boundaries or restrictions. If I want to, I can even spit a bean. Nobody would care. They don't even know who I am.

I frequently meet people while traveling, whether on the mountain trails, at the bus stop, or simply walking down the street, eating at a restaurant, or shopping at a mall. It would begin with a random conversation and progress to a more sensible topic. Although it doesn't take long, like a few hours or more, those moments boost my confidence to talk with strangers in public places, which I didn't like doing before.

I used to be afraid of crowds, but after traveling, I began to embrace them without regard for what others thought of me. Another thing I did to boost my confidence was to change my mindset. I used to believe that everyone who saw me would say something negative about me. I worked abroad where people don't care about what you'll do or your physical attributes, and that's when I stopped caring about others and focused solely on myself.

I changed my physical appearance and dressed decently and beautifully to fit in with the modern era while also gaining confidence. When we believe we are unattractive, we tend to avoid social situations and wallow in self-pity. But guess what? There is no such thing as an ugly human (except those with monster characters). We are all beautiful in our own way; we just need to recognize it. And if you love yourself, you will begin to feel beautiful and will be able to walk confidently in a crowd.

I have many flaws, but no one notices, so why should I? That makes perfect sense.

And did you know that interacting online can boost confidence as well? We may not see each other, but it appears that we are physically conversing. And the knowledge we gained online can also be applied in real-world situations.


I'm introverted, but depending on the situation and my mood, I can be extroverted. I can say that I am better now than I was before. Well, I'll have to prove it once I return to my homeland, where people are so judgmental and there are so many "Marites" gossipers all over the place, lol. But for the time being, I'll embrace this positive personality trait I've developed and continue to face the world, or rather the universe, confidently beautiful with a heart like Pia Wurtzbach 🀣.


You can also reach me on my socials and let's be connected:

β€’noise.appΒ β€’HIVEΒ β€’EcencyΒ β€’PeakDΒ Β 

β€’TwitterΒ β€’FacebookΒ β€’Youtube

25
$ 4.31
$ 3.71 from @TheRandomRewarder
$ 0.10 from @Pantera
$ 0.05 from @tired_momma
+ 18
Sponsors of Jane
empty
empty
empty
empty
Avatar for Jane
Written by Β Β 2058
2 months ago
Enjoyed this article?  Earn Bitcoin Cash by sharing it! Explain
...and you will also help the author collect more tips.

Comments

It's great that you have set out to be better that you were many years back. That's a good thing about traveling. You get to discover more about yourself and shine :)

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Everything we need is on the other side of fear. We have to step out of our comfort zone if we want to overcome our lack of confidence. You did a great job with socializing and change of looks too. You kept your mind open and dared the impossible.

$ 0.00
2 months ago

I am the opposite to you but still sometimes I tend to have less kumpyansa sa Sarili. I do have my downs and self pity. The little confidence that I have is the only thing that keeps me going and indeed we are the one who could boost our own ego and personality. Thanks for sharing those things.

$ 0.01
2 months ago

We all, at some times have that self pity. But we shouldn't allow it to totally ruin the confidence we left for ourselves.

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Up until now I'm still introverted person, but for somehow I already gained some confidence to voice out and be heard. And I would agree with you, socialising with strangers can help us feel confident and comfortable, than hanging out with people who knows us. Strangers has no expectations, but people who knows us had a lot, and they are making us anxious.

$ 0.02
2 months ago

Haha.. Exactly.. At least, after talking with strangers, there'll be no feeling that we'll be betrayed, stabbed, or whatever..

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Iba pa din pag online kesa sa physical na interaction hehe. May mas confidence pag online.

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Kaya nga

$ 0.00
2 months ago

I start to ignore the phone calls especially when they're not necessary πŸ˜†πŸ€£ but I'm happy for you that you grow your confidence and it's all because of travelling ❀️

$ 0.00
2 months ago

I am glad to know the way you developed your confidence. Before I was also a shy person but with time I changed myself.

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Same pala tayo miss Jane. Ako grabe talaga noon. Sobrang mahiyain ako. Di ako pala talk. Tahimik lang ako always tas kabado lagi. Masasabi ko na nag improve ako kunti ngayon. 😁

$ 0.01
2 months ago

Kunti? Haha. For surr malaki pinagbago

$ 0.00
2 months ago

That's really cool madam. Hoe I can I can be like you. I also remember kapag may reporting lagi talaga akong parang walang boses dahil sa hiya tas wala pa confidence ang hirap kapag wala yan ee. Talagang kapag pinairal ang hiya walang mangyayari talaga 😩

$ 0.01
2 months ago

Ngayon b ny hiya parn? Haha

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Naku Madam totoo yang talking with stranger kesa sa kakilala. That's why I love my work. Iba ibang tao palagi you build your confidence as time goes by.

$ 0.01
2 months ago

Kya nga. Mas comfortable kpg hndi ka kilala ng kausap mo πŸ˜‚..wag lang papascam haha

$ 0.00
2 months ago

You are like the butterfly after the metamorphosis Ms. jane that was for sure hehe. Me too I think I am a late bloomer as they said, many things happened to me that I knew I am out of confidence; even writing alone feels like those early times this is not for me for I am not that good, and also the looks, I am that physically looks fine as I see myself. But things is changing when we started to take steps to another chance uwu.

$ 0.02
2 months ago

Iba2 naman tyo ng looks..at wala pangit physically, nsa character yan..as for writing, you are one of the best here. Ako nga to feeling noob parn πŸ˜‚

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Haha.. We are the same I am very scared to recite even though I know the correct answer.. Hehe.. Or I am just too lazy to raise my hand..

$ 0.01
2 months ago

Even though I know the answer, I just don't want to talk. my mouth trembles when I am nervous πŸ˜‚

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Same here, I used to lack in self confidence 🀣. Perhaps because I live in the countryside and seldom meet different people 🀣.

$ 0.01
2 months ago

Ako naman kc nabubully dati πŸ˜‚

$ 0.00
2 months ago

This is incredible! I feel like I read about myself. 😊 Over time, I became more self-confident, especially when I started working, but I still feel more comfortable when communicating with strangers than with people I know. 😊 I have become freer and more relaxed in public speeches and presentations, but what annoys me is that I sometimes blush because I don't feel comfortable. I am happiest when I am alone with my thoughts. 😊

$ 0.02
2 months ago

Yep..there's always that something we can feel when we are alone..we don't need to worry about anything

$ 0.00
2 months ago

"And did you know that interacting online can boost confidence as well? "

Completely agree with you. It can be very encouraging, despite being hundreds of km from each other.

$ 0.01
2 months ago

It is actually as if we are talking face-to-face.

$ 0.00
2 months ago

I’m still nervous to pick up the phone calls. I really don’t like talking on the phone, I prefer texting πŸ˜‚

I’m same as you - generally introverted, but in the right environment very extraverted πŸ’™

$ 0.04
2 months ago

I can relate to this. 🀣

$ 0.00
2 months ago

With the right people hehe

$ 0.00
2 months ago

For me confident is come from in our own way just do the positive things and dint think the negative side i know your capabilities to make you own self more confident enough just believe and faith to your self

$ 0.01
2 months ago

Thanks.. We all have that 😊

$ 0.00
2 months ago