An Ode to My First Love

It's been almost 17 years from when I first saw your glowing and gorgeous face. I fell in love with you on an instant. It was my 'Love at First Sight'. Though I can't describe my relationship with you but I guess my relationship with you is a snail's to it's own shell. You're present in me and I'm nothing without you. Maybe I am little bit weird, little bit dumb, I know nothing except how to love you with all my heart, how to save you from the evil eyes.

In my past when I was decaying, withering with time, you are the one who saved me, who saved my fragile soul from dying. Finally I found a glimpse of hope now through your presence. After billions of setting moon, you are the first person who accepted me as the way who I am. You never fails to give peace to my wounded soul. I have found someone as if a wanderer has found a permanent shelter to rely . You made me forget all my pains, longings as if you casted an amazing effect on me. You taught me how to live again. With you beside me, the world seems a beautiful place.

Now I do not want to go far away from you. With you every pains seems pleasant sweet and bearable. Your smiles, your presence, your every breathe, your every heartthrob are my strength. I have got hope, inspirition , strength, courage, reason to live from them only. Maybe this world can show cruelty to me but my one and only safe harborage is your arms.

I can't deny that my confined heart started to beat aloud when you entered into my lonely life for the very first time. My life has become more beautiful than before. Though we are living in two different bodies but I'm sure that we got one soul.

I had nothing to do but to decay over time but you gave me a new reason to live. I'm happy that somehow by the blessings and mercy of Almighty Allah, I have found an eternal love in this temporary world. I was feeling lonely, I had no idea that someday Allah, the almighty will create a soul just for me on whom I can rely on my worst days, with whom I can share my deepest and hidden secrets.

I think I am becoming greedy day by day coz now I can give up all the things which I currently have but I can't give you up even in my dreams. I think because of I have nothing precious but YOU.

You're the one who can hear all my longings, my pains, my troubles, my untold desires and dreams. I don't know why you don't hesitate to give all your good fortunes, all your achievements, all your prayers, all your happiness to me. I'm so unworthy and poor soul that I can't give you anything. I'm not perfect but I can love you because it is the only thing I'm capable of doing.

My hungry eyes always wants your presence. You have made me enchanted with your heavenly presence. Now it seems so difficult for me to breath. I can't stop thinking about you. I do hate love but I want to fall in love with you each and every moment.

I thought there is no one who can save my devastated soul but I was wrong. You were and are always there for me. I tried my best to resist myself from Loving you but the more I try not fall in love with you the more I am falling in love with you again and again .

You are the perfect and exact answer of my prayers. There were and are lots of moments I could and can not live with you but this absence of yours can't take away or hide or burry my love for you. Every single person read the beautiful, the shinning first page of my life but you're the one who have read the whole story of my life.

You're the one who never fails to make me happy, to make me feel worthy, to make my path smoother , to make my life beautiful. I can't disapprove that there was no quarrel between us but those quarrels, arguments, arrogance, couldn't stopped us from falling in love with each other.

You gave me the strength to walk on that path on which I always wanted to walk,you gave me the strength to realize that I can do anything, I can be anything. You know me better than myself.

I used to see myself through the eyes of others but you gave me another pair of eyes by which I saw my real value, shinning and precious soul of mine.

When I was enchanted by the evil forces you were there to protect my soul from becoming a slave. That time I realized my own past, my own heart were not mine but you were the one who were there by my side. You gave me the eyes and heart to see and feel my hidden wings . You gave me the courage to learn that I am bigger , braver than my fears.

Because of you, I can face my own soul after so many years. I can feel my own heartbeats after so many years. I used to feel incomplete but after having you I got half of my being , you perfected half of my being by just existing in my life.

You're the one for whom my life was seeking for. Now I can stop searching here with peace. After having your love, I got new life , new feelings. I don't know what you have done me and at the other hand I don't want to know the reason.

I know I can't show my gratitude, my love towards you just by weaving some words step by step but even after this I want to thank you.

Thank you for completing my incomplete life. Thank you for giving me the courage to face my own self. Thank you for filling my lonely life with love and care. Thank you for healing my scars. Thank you for fighting for me. Thank you for always standing by my side.

Thank you for being born for me. Thank you for being born as half of my being. Thank you for being born as my bestest friend. Thank you for being born as my first love. Thank you for being born as my real life angel. Thank you for being born as my guide. Thank you for being born as my savior. Thank you for being born as ointment to my wounds. Thank you for being born as my Sister.

Though I don't even think it is possible yet I will try to pay all my debts to you.

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Lemme finish here as I got my 2nd dose of vaccination for this reason I'm not feeling well. I am suffering from mild fever (since yesterday yet I showed my braveness by taking 2nd dose 😑) as well but even after this I wanted to write because I did nothing all day long except lying on my bed as a coma patient and resting so I was feeling bad because of my inactivity and unproductivity.

I tried my best to sum up all my running thoughts.

Thank you for being here with me and giving your precious time.

Thank you for your support and love. Thank you sooo much my lovely readers, commentators, upvoters, subscribers, Rusty.

Now I am done for today, hope I will be able to be back here.

Wishing you a very good and blessed night Ahead. Don't forget to take care of yourself and your family. Don't forget to dive into the realm of dreams at time.

Irene

8.29pm

04.01.2022

Lead image + other image source :— Pixabay.Com