At age 30 which should come first?

One of my favourite activities now is to join some hangouts on Twitter. While I go about my daily activities, I’ll have my earpod on listening to different opinions on relationship-related matters. The way everyone thinks they know it all, the fights, the bants and the flirting is fascinating. It’s also funny how everyone can’t agree on a certain topic, there will always be people objecting to a particular notion, no matter how simple the topic is, I guess that’s what makes us human.

I can remember the recent debates about when a lady should wake up or in their words “a proper wife material”. Someone said if your girlfriend sleeps over at your place on a weekend she should wake up before 8 am to do the chores, if she doesn’t, she isn’t a wife material. Which means don’t marry her. As expected some people agreed while some disagreed. Some said it should be both ways and not just the lady. 

A particular comment caught my attention. A girl said-

“I’ve dated so many rich men who wake up early to cook breakfast for me. They serve me breakfast in bed”

A guy replied- 

“have you ever asked yourself why none married you?”

I haven’t seen a better ratio than that. The likes and comments were blowing up. This is just an example of the little fights that take place during these hangouts. Though I join most of it just for fun, sometimes I learn a thing or two from the woke generation.

A particular topic got my attention yesterday, -

“At the age of 30 what should come first for a man, car, land or wife?”

Another user added “With 5 million naira and at the age of 30, what…” .

At first, I laughed and wondered why someone will ask such a ridiculous question. In what way are the 3 related or how do they connect with age 30?. However, after joining a twitter space and seeing the debate I realized this might be a big issue for guys in their late 20s and early 30s face.

Which comes first?

First, the culture of attaching various things to age is something common in this part of the world. Society believes various age landmark has certain expectations. This is something we can’t take away no matter how we try, but we can control how it affects us. Ignoring what the society wants for you and focusing on what you feel is good for you is the key to living a happy life. 

Looking at each of the things mentioned, I can say they are all timeless.

Car?

With 5 million Naira you can get a car, with even less one can but one important thing is - for what purpose?. Why do people buy cars? . If your reason for buying a car is because others are buying, or because you’ve gotten to a certain age then it will end up being a liability for you and not an asset. If the car won’t make journeying easier for you or bring in more money for you I see no reason why you should get it when all you have is 5 million Naira.

It doesn't end at buying a car. You need to be prepared for constant maintenance. If you are not prepared our bad road will teach you a lesson.

Mr A might get his car at the age of 27 while you have not even a bicycle at age 32, but that doesn’t mean he is living a more fulfilled life than you.

Land?

This is an asset that most people love to have. They say “Land appreciates”, so getting a land might be a smart move. The question is after getting a land, what next?. Leaving your land unattended is very dangerous in some parts of the country. The same person that sold the land to you, can sell it to another.

However, if you put some measures in place to avoid losing the land in the long run you might be glad you bought the land. But no law says one can’t get a land after age 30.

Wife/ marriage?

Simply because you have 5 million Naira with you and you are 30 already, doesn’t mean marriage is the next thing. Though financial status also matters when trying to settle down, especially when you come from a tribe that loves elaborate weddings a lot, but marriage is more than the wedding itself.

The real deal is what you and your wife will face after tying the knot. If you spend the 5 million on a wedding and have no constant income stream, then the marriage might end faster than the time it took you to plan the wedding.

Conclusion

If you decide to spend the money on any of the 3 it isn’t bad, so far you’re satisfied after taking the step and it meets a need. What’s the purpose of money if it can’t be spent on what we want?

However, another alternative is to invest the money, either in a business or in yourself. If you don’t have plans before to get a land, car or get married before, getting 5 million shouldn't make you jump into it. Think it through and if they aren’t part of the agenda for now regardless of the age, the best option will be to find a way o  double it or increase it by investing.

Thanks for Reading! 🚗💚💒