February 5, 2022

I had gone to a lot of pain

A pain of losing a loved one, a pet, a friend

A pain of losing the reason why I keep on going

I can't compare the pain I'm feeling right to those pain

But I guess having this pain is still the same level as those pain I felt before

I was happy earlier

I am so inspired

I did my fair share of making myself happy

Even for while I forgot about the stress at work

I forget about being tired

Stress and all that

Truly, you make me feel happy

You don't know me

I am feeling I know you all my life

You don't know I exist

I'm happy you are born

You do what you need to do

You are being true to yourself

But you don't know what you did

In just a simple post with hashtag

You broke our hearts

For sure there will be people who are happy for you

There are people celebrating with you

There are people that will support you

I can be all

But there will be some people that are hurt

And not liking what they see

What they found out is painful

I belong to these people

I support you, I respect you

But sometimes I felt possessive of you

I get jealous

You cannot treat us all fair

You are only human after all

But still you hurt us, you hurt me

Unintentionally

I wish I have the courage to say it to you

To leave you a message of what you did

But you will just brush it off

For sure you are just laughing with our reaction

It is not your intention, yes

Yet I hope you will not hurt us obviously

If you like someone, keep it to yourself

We could celebrate with you

But we will still feel hurting

We can't hide this feeling

We will be crying

There will be someone crying behind your sweet smile to someone

There will be someone wishing you hold their hands

There will be someone wishing you call their names

There will be someone that wishing you look at them, check on them

There will be someone waiting to be appreciated too

Everyone is longing for your attention

But you give it to one

You give it to her

One lucky girl

One talented woman

She is the one you really really like

While everyone of us are now from the distant

Watching you appreciating her

You are our life

Yet you made us feel like we are just part in the background

We are just a dust, that you brush away

Congratulations to that one lucky woman

Feel sorry for the women you left behind

I just hope everyone will able to have a complete sleep

After you ruin their night

And your ruined their heart

We will try to forget this moment

We will try to move on

I pray that God heals us,

God heals the pain right away

I hate you but I still love you

I just want to feel it is worth having the pain

In a life with you, or

Or no pain at all, but you are not there

I guess I just need to adjust to the situation like this

You are not the chosen one

You are too far from him

He didn't know you

So love him from a distant

Or maybe don't love him

Just respect and like him

I am moving on from this pain so that I don't have to bear this tomorrow

Sorry guys....

I just need to let it all out

Thanks for reading, if you happen to read it

That is exactly what I'm feeling right now

I hope God heals broken hearts over night

Images from Unsplash