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What comes to your mind seeing the title "Ten years experience needed"?
The first thing I would think of is a job, probably someone with deep experience in a particular field is needed to occupy a position in an organization but for this article, it is the other way round.
When I was younger, the local Tv stations do advertise different job vacancies and the least experience they required for the jobs was 5 years. I didn't understand what it meant until I became a teenager, I put the piece together and always wonder how it would be possible for fresh graduates to get employment when every job required at least 5 years of experience.
Keeping the idea of no experience - no job in mind scares me a lot because it has always been my dream to start a good job immediately after my higher institution, little did I know that it wasn't about how much work experience you have but how long you have stayed at home without employment.
The idea is a silly one but I think the employers believe that people who have stayed longer at home would value the job more than fresh graduates.
This article has nothing to do with getting a job. Today, I got one of the biggest shocks of my life seeing someone bringing the issues of experience into relationship matters.
Earlier this week I wrote about the "relationship manual" based on a true story of a girl who blocked her lover because of a canceled date, I thought I have seen it all but I was wrong.
A lady seeks my advice on a particular issue yesterday and I was wowed. Her friend had so many issues with her previous relationship and she chooses to stay single just to prevent herself from continuous heart breaks.
Six months ago, she told her friend she was tired of staying single and she wished to have a man that was ready to settle down with her.
The lady narrating the story took things seriously and she started observing her male friends so that she can link her friend with the serious males who also want a relationship. There was no sign of any guy so she stepped up her game and started posting her friend's pictures on her timeline if it would work.
It did, a young guy found her attractive and he asked about her. She immediately linked them up since she knew the guy to be a devoted person to his religion, calm, handsome, lovely and he has a good job.
The guy started calling and texting her but he kept updating their friend who linked them together.
In the guy's claim, he said the girl is always rude and harsh on him during a phone conversation but he didn't give up. He arranged for a date and she turned up but it seems like she came for the food and drinks because she didn't allow any reasonable discussion to hold.
The guy was losing interest already but the matchmaker kept encouraging him because she might be testing him or something. She contacted the girl and spoke to her to change how she is treating the guy, she promised to change.
The guy decided to visit her on a weekend since she wasn't willing to come over to his place. She asked what he wanted her to offer him and he said anything, she went out to get two bottles of hot alcoholic drinks.
She offered him one and she took one, the guy was still trying to explain to her that he doesn't take alcohol and she was halfway gone with her drink. He was shocked and just dropped the bottle, after drinking she took her bible and started reading it without giving the guy any attention.
He tried to start a conversation but she was reluctant to engage with him, he took his leave since he wasn't welcome.
He called their matchmaker to let her know that he is not interested anymore, she got angry and went to visit her friend just to know why she didn't give the guy a chance since he was serious about settling down.
To her surprise, the lady's reason for not giving the guy attention was a silly one.
She said that the guy is young and doesn't have a relationship experience that is enough for him to take good care of her. She further explained that men with 10 years of relationships experience and above are good at taking care of ladies, she used her sister as an example because she married someone who is older and she is happily married.
I was surprised as well because it was the first time I would be hearing that someone needs a man with 10 years of experience in a relationship before she can pay attention to him.
She is just 25 and the guy is 27, she knew the guy's first relationship was at 21. In that six years, the guy has only been in a relationship for four years because he was busy building his career.
To cut the story short, he got married four months after he stopped contacting the girl. He met a serious girl and didn't waste time, the former girl didn't know he was rich because he never mentioned or flaunt his wealth to her.
I said in an article that works for A might not for B, living our life based on what others are doing to their lives is a wrong idea.
Experience shouldn't be a criterion for choosing a lover because if everyone does that, a lot of people would remain single forever. The girl in the story was been childish and greedy for treating the guy that way and I think she just lost someone who could have been her dream man because she didn't know he is financially okay and if she knew, it would have been her only reason to stay in the relationship.
Relationship is more than just the material things involved, it would be a waste of time emphasizing that because a lot of people have heard this a hundred times and they still just go for a relationship that would have only material things to offer them.
The perfect relationships we see out there have their flaws so why copy them when you can build your own from the scratch? Now, another guy wants to meet the same girl and the matchmaker seek advice if she should carry on with the matchmaking.