Still, A Good Decision Even Appears It Was The Worst— a redemption.
I am looking for a great redemption; who wasn't?. We are looking for the best excuse for our whole lives. The best of all the good, so we could still deliverance from fighting negativity inside, get away from the world. Decided and longing for freedom. One of these is deciding that we need to proclaim the judgment. The decision is crucial, some decision is dangerous inside the heart, and others are like a free bird to let go. But most importantly, even if it's not good in the first place, it will always be nice, for we chose it not because we just want to, we made that decision thinking of something, and that is redemption for me.
I loved the scene of my life where there was a thrilling drama, where I could extract another topic again. Another chance to leave the moment in the darkness and comes to light. It's a light, for it was for good not by myself, but it's for the sake of everyone. Thanks to Sister Lhes for enlightened me. The angel whom I don't know personally, but I am thankful I met her.
It's not easy to decide, isn't it? Especially when it needs to be blunt. My head hurt, and I began to overheat. It's a pressure thinking what if the decision we made will ruin us inside? What if the decision we touch will be wrong and the regrets come. We are all afraid of guilt, which those not easy to forget. I remember those days when my problem is just deciding what food I shall eat in the school's canteen, what should I wear to prepare myself for the going. Even determine if I will go to school or not.
Then comes the torn of being mature; it's not that deciding what to eat for now I should also loom for the price to extend the life of my budget. Comes the reality where I am not a kid anymore; I should not just laugh at things when I did incorrectly. There will be consequences to happen. When I worked as a supervisor, you must not be wrong, and even if you were wrong proved, you are not.
At first, I was confused why I needed to act like I was always right even if I did wrong? My mentor taught me the reasons, and he was right. I need to look for an excuse if I made a mistake in production, for the blame will come to me, and I shall protect myself too. The worst thing I encountered was that I needed to fire a worker whom I knew he wasn't deserved to be that way; after that, I talked to him personally and said sorry. Evaluation is low, and he had a very slow score; I can't judge him as a competent one, for I also don't want to lie in the record. Maybe that was one reason I decided to give up being a supervisor, I am still young, and I can't inject that kind of evaluation of people, asking about their lives and now firing them if they don't reach the standard. Don't judge me; there is a company policy I need to obey.
As we mature, the reality is that deciding becomes harder and harder. So some could still choose the wrong side in the face of others, for we also look for the future. We won the end over others.
Some might ask why are they selfish in the decision they make? The reality is that we are selfish and biased. Like my previous article, we all had biasedness, and now we all had selfishness; that's how the decision was made to become selfish or let others become selfish over you. Deciding for your good and others' wealth, but if I give you a chance to decide, what will you choose? Other's sake or your own sake?.
If you choose your own, still a good decision even if it seems the worst. Some will again be talked back; you were selfish and biased. People will look down on you; another hand, it was for your good and plans. Sometimes it's better to plan for yourself first and then prepare for other people again. You could fix others if you were not set yet.
And you were a martyr and choice the others over yourself, again, seem like evil, but for yourself, it was good. Some people do not care about themselves because they care more for others.
Decide now or not. As more seconds, time, and days pass, the decision is getting harder and harder for we realize a lot of lacking. The pros and cons.
It's actually expected that others will reject your decision for they will not be the benefit from it. Also, average that you will say you're being selfish in making it. But did we ask ourselves, are we not selfish? I was selfish; I thought about my future and planned for the worst things. Because in reality, at the end of the day, we will have only ourselves who cares. Some of the people we give stuff to will also have personal problems soon, and they will first solve them before helping you.
I think being selfish in decisions seems terrible, but not that way. So I chose my personal peace and focus in my last decision. A redemption happened after I concluded that it feels like I just did the right thing soon enough. Even if the result is worst, I will smile, for I know it just looks worst, but it's not.
Thanks for reading.
How Biased You Are In Writing Your Article? — we had all biasedness.
What was your definition of being biased? Is that one side pointer, or just their interest they want to write, published, and journalized? Well, that's all that defines what we are in the first place. We wrote thoughts and described scenes where we are the benefits of everything. That's what we loved, and that was what we wanted. We loved to write and listed thing that we knew we could be benefited by that action, writing experiences so we could remember them, and writing ideas that we are the one that which was interested in so that it was easy to formulate and subtract things; we had all this biasedness in writing here, accept or not.
There was something when you wanted to begin writing, and you already had a topic to write, wasn't it? The climate was hot, and it was in the middle of the afternoon, yet I found myself writing under the braces of an Indian Mango tree. The humidity is so low, and some might get interested in siesta instead. It's Sunday after all and must be the rest day to some. Just me who watched the people walk along never look at me in their goings.
We often called media and newscasters biased; I was guilty of that. Some are dubious that what they want will only be the one that will execute, and the non-interest will be hidden under the station's news and programs. That might be the reason why I now often watch television. I don't want the information featured, always thinking it was a biased statement.
Not until I discover a station where they contrast the other station, the SMNI Tv, owned and aired by the Kingdom of Jesus Christ, and the NET25 "Mata ng Agila" or "Eye of the eagle" owned and operated by "Iglesia ni Cristo" where they were braved enough to contrast the opponent stations. I was a bit amazed at these two stations; in my head is that they were not biased media, unlike the GMA, TV5, and ABS-CBN, which just look fabricated. Yet I think for others' thoughts and minds, these two stations are now biased toward them. Like me, they don't like what the news and article had been published on the station.
Biasness happens when we don't like the content and not when we love the views and opinions. Fact-checking is sometimes a must, and no station is perfect; no news is ideal research. The catchy and click-baiting it was the best for everyone, especially viewers.
Then comes my writing; I admit that I was biased in all my work. Not everyone was pleased with my content, and that was fine. Not everyone is agreed. Sometimes I think others just say they agreed indeed, even if it's not (Kidding yet ironic). Even the article I often read is also biased. Critics, but I found myself enjoying it.
We shall admit that we are biased; what we loved and what interest we had is the best topic to write about. Some people are just annoyed that what they hated results in just an ignored.
**Others are afraid to be biased. Especially those shy people who had thought in mind yet are worried that they will be the face of biasedness and result in a problem.** So even with how to beautify their thoughts and concepts, they overthink that they won't fit others' tastes. No, it's not; that's how writing was designed, to critic something, man vs. man, even men vs. society, as they said. Use the word appropriately to avoid the negative.
WE ARE ALL HAD BIASES
I wrote what my think interest me to write. When you want the topic, even if you were biased toward others or even within yourself. The idea and reasonings just come forward, like a word is falling in your head, and you had just to pick those ingle words and convert them to an article.
It feels like the journalist was designed to be biased, to criticize specific people. That's why some are annoyed, and that was the living proof of being a journalist. To dig more and define more as they think negatives and positives. But as a professional says, we must look for the opposite, yet we should not stay within that. We also must look for the positive side of the writing. We must know how to blend the positive and negative that will show solidarity to work.
Being biased in writing is a vast thing, some until now never yet felt that being favored for more articles they wrote was full of self-interest. That is okay, for I knew I was also that blogger here. We had to learn it from ourselves might be.
Now could you have felt that you are also a biased one? That's fine. We're just fine, lol.
Thanks for reading.
The Color Of Roses Is PINK, Yet People Want RED.
We somehow divided with numerous such colors, from white to black people and people labeled Asians as yellow—a dark representing evil and white as the goodness. We were of different colors and races in our life of ourselves. For that was the boundary; that was the image of exchange. **We become a part of the invisible wall that divides us with no definite ending from the beginning**. We sometimes liked pink roses, yet we loved red—the color of love, equity, and blood.
Despite the world of Filipinos now are in the side of pink or red. A battle between what they said good and evil, same with my color as a red team we also look the same. The heat of the climate was more intense as the election remarked accomplished. And now, the future will define by the color of the blood. **A red that was also the pigment of flame, that soon raised like a bird, a phoenix that must burn first and turn itself to ash, comes the new life and new define of razing sight**. Once over-defined, the Phoenix thought it wasn't worthy of the beauty until it burned by the flame.
Some people question the Million people, are we not learning the past?
We did, and that was why we wanted a change, not only the color from yellow to red but then because we knew and looked forward to more than we expected. It might sound biased, obtuse, and many more that are unrequitedly defined. Like you, I also had some politicians that supported in senate yet weren't listed the name. For I am single people and million wants somebody else. That's a democracy was is all about.
We learn from the past, and we look forward to the future. I thought that politicians won't change my view until the mayor of the south came with an attitude everyone hated, yet proved that he did more than anything for the people of the fast. We chose and supported him, and we were not wrong in supporting PRDD. The changes prepared, the future is to come.
Whatever the color you are into, red some partnered with green, pink other seen yellow, blue or white. We all had the same thought; we were all educated and chose who we thought was best. If you believe that what future you desired perished when your candidate lost, that was also what we had. What was the lot of a leader who thought negatively? Endorsed people from the opposition who did nothing but contradict good governance. What was the end if we listened to the artist? That just come and sing to support. They are all rich people, who could sustain their lives and the future, but the poorer we are, the hardest it takes.
What was the future of the son of a dictator? Another martial law?. What was the end of the thief? More wealth to come.
The roses are pink, and some are red. They are different colors in flower, yet they are all a rose. The butterfly won't look for a color that is pink and who was red. The butterfly is the future, and the fate is beautiful as the color of mixing one of the wings. When roses open their pollen to the butterfly, they were two benefits from each other, the butterfly fed by the nectars, and the pollination from the winged creature fertilized the roses. A movement where when we open and give ourselves, we all benefit.
When you think that politics had been gone after the election, that's not what happened. It gets more and more as the days and weeks pass, even months and years to the harbor. The topic is thought from yours truthfully, not to attack or give interest in such a narrow field. But that is why I felt today, as I ended the letter of reads, I am sure that not everyone is pleased.
The idea that hides if you have never seen it is that roses have different shades and sizes of the petals, and even some have no torn yet are still a rose. We, the Filipinos, are the rose, divided by the colors, gender, and even educational belief, but we were still petals at the end of the day. Some will retard, others will wilt, and some won't bloom yet more and more to rose.
I chose the red color of the roses to represent the blood, for I am Iloco of born; I want the red as the flame that will ignite the future of my country. You chose the pink for you think it was the best, so did I.
It is still a long journey, and more issues to come. Still, a mocking, and others will find it hard to admit. But we were born to be roses and what we need is ourselves alone to shine. I believed that the color of the future rose, which was red for my vision. You are free to disregard it, but that is all my thing.
Thanks for the colorful roses; I saved my day.
My Ex-Girlfriend's Boyfriend Called Me — Want a Fight?
I felt caged in what thought I should share with you, what brings to come and what story to tell. Then I was again unfocused, for what happened worried me so much. It was a real story; The man chatted and called me last night. I am not worried about what he will say about me, for I know I never did anything; I a worried for her imagining what could happen to her if he is aggressive to the girl. I will share with you not to become a gossip but might some will learn something about this:
I will be three years in a no-relationship this June 2022. The bracket of moving on, a three year where some labeled a "3-year law" when you loved someone, and they broke your heart wait and heal for at least three years to begin a new relationship again. I don't know who made that, but maybe not because of the 'Three-year law.' It's because I don't want still to become a boyfriend. I was an excellent BF but not perfect back to that time; I had so many flows and defects, was a laggard, and sometimes I was the devil.
Strict boyfriend? No. I never get strict with her in our past relations. I always supported what she wanted in life. She told me she wanted to work overseas, and I just nodded and said 'yes, go' and even helped her processed her papers. I wasn't strict, hoping she won't be rigid, yet things go in overturn. I have been tired of the scene every day, were saying sorry then comes again another sorry for the following days, blocked and unblocked, rejects calls each of us. We started dating in June 2016; imagine how many years had passed.
Then it turned to the story cut; we broke up. I think I was the one who said that. Judge me not, but I was tired that time. Then the female realized her wrongness and wanted to win me back; I was a cold-hearted man. I rejected.
She was in a relationship last August 6, 2021, with a man I think is good (But I am more good-looking, lol). I just wished they would hang along and finally move on from what we had. Also hoping that we could remain friends, for I told a lot of her. My secrets and she was the one who knew my good and bad side. She might realize that men and not the same as it was. I never scolded her or talked about terrible items, yet she told me the new guy does, I never disrespect her privacy, but the new one did. I never pressured her, and I just wanted her to do what she loved, wished, and planned. Even though we will be on the other side oath, I did support her.
Last November 2021, she called me and confessed everything; she was not in love with the guy. She thought she could learn to love him when times stood and run, yet that's not what happened. The more days and more months, ut has shown up on the wrong side. She called me often; I think there was nothing wrong with that. We were still friends, and I respected her no matter what.
But things became so much when she confessed more; she still loved me.
I admit that I still coveted her at that time, yet I didn't want to interfere with their relationship. I just said she must move forward for life's sake.
I think the man read what the convo we had last time, or she made it for her to get out of her toxic relationship. I was confident that I never said anything to them, I was also the one who limited the convo in a bit way, and I was the one who would end the convo—with respect for their relationship. I don't want to become the ghoul that I was before.
I can't tell you everything that happened and shall happen next, I confessed this to Ms. Lhes sometimes, and she was the best big sister I think very much knew well. She gave me a piece of meaningful advice, and she looked at me neutrally. I loved that I found not only friends here but also a big sister who was a stranger. One I think is the benefit I look forward to becoming anonymous, just the face to show but not my real identity.
You could judge me but not her. I respect her no matter what. I had two sisters and a mother, so I knew what and how to become a female.
This morning she called me, and she said sorry for what her Ex-Boyfriend told her on the phone. I told her its okay; I was just worried about what will happen to them if he showed aggressiveness toward her. She just laughed; oww, I forgot she was Ybanag, an Amazona who was once the one who fought for me, lol. Yeah, she was a fighter herself.
Judge me for sharing it with you, but don't judge her. She just wanted to free herself in a relationship where she wasn't happy and even wasn't interested. We never talked a comeback, but we were friends no matter what.
Girl and boys, move on with yourself first, not having others to avoid this misinterpretation.
No cheating involved. Don't talk things about the girl. I won't reply. Thanks for reading.
I Do For I Like The Pain— Inspired by Boy in the Bubble
Knock me out. Punch me like I was not going to live again, attacked me with a rapier or a heavy solid, not a shotgun pointing my head. I wanted to feel the pain; I liked the color of the liquid to get out from my mouth and even my eyebrows; all I wanted was the proof that no hurt is temporary; the feeling is nothing when I am on the road. Boys should endure the pain, for a painless is not a real man. The clash and resemblance, I was in the fight not with a human but within my humane.
Can I write something honest and about to hold? Comes from a man who wanted to define pain but not ordinarily. They enjoy it; painful is seduction. The pain in the body is like ecstasy, a figure of desert and the point of some life wants. Men enjoy the pain; it's like a game no one knew. The more painful it will become, the best player I shall be.
The domination of a man in the world was questioning who was real and not. The playful agenda and the seductive activity of men. Humans love to see others in pain; that's a real one. We loved to watch Manny Pacquiao or any boxer bled in the eyes; we enjoyed seeing a loser after the match of our favorite one. We loved the guy on the mask pretending and hiding, an arena of pain. We loved to see an action star being hurt and comes the transmission of they will be the one who will break the opponents. The more painful it was, the more we enjoyed seeing it. The reddish the body. It was a treasure to keep.
Not just others, but within ourselves, we loved doing it, we hurt it little by little until we enjoyed in the state as becomes happiness.
I remember when I was young, and the world was so cruel as my eyes could see. People are overegging, and I just feel nothing but numb. When your body feels nothing but a freeze of joint, you will actually look for some trilling event like looking for anyone who could punch your face or your body, fight, and just surrender and let him do all the jobs. Even yourselves alone become the enemy, and you must be the one to bang it out to the wall and seek some enjoyment. I enjoyed those sensations; the pain was gaining more as I remembered. There was rhythm in drumming my head to the wall, a number sequence like an odd count. Trumpet-like drumming sound and the boomerang of hatred of my life.
The boom is like a music note, passing through the thin air and the heavy head. Then the skin is the one who begged for me to stop. The skin dried a little bit, I stopped for a moment, but the pain was addicting. I can't help but continue; I look at the soft surface and enjoy the world of negating pain.
Also, when I was a teenager, I had this thing that really looking some blindness. I want to tease someone so they will punch me back, then come more irritations to them to make it harder. Most of them are ladies knocked with hair and even their shirts. Then come here like a tiger that will attack me, then they will be the one that leaves me, not I am who was satisfied.
The pain is like ecstasy; it's well-defined and more than what we thought. Sometimes we cry because of pain, some pain is hidden as love to self-induce them, and like a strange feeling, sometimes we love and look at the pain.
I DO IT BECAUSE I LOVE THE PAIN
Still strange to some to become a pain lover, but I look forward to the other side of the angle. Most men are looking for it but don't define they love doing it. This will make an argument for the said topic.
I admit I was drowned and emotionally weakened at that time. I knew that it was not typical to love pain like loving negativity as in my younger days. I don't want that my son feels the same childhood as I do; I don't want to repeat the history of what pain is so much comfortable.
**I do it because I loved the pain, I was a rebel at that time, and I admit it.**
To understand people who choose to cut themselves, mark and scar their own. They don't love the pain, but they needed that one.
Still strange why I wrote this topic; still, a question needed to be met and defined. It might be because I can't tell you everything.
Do you love the pain? Endures for the sake of something?
People loved the pain when they felt none because we wanted to survive; we tried to wake up and hope that banging could cause a comfort that we can not and never get from others. That might be, but others could manifest themselves.
The River Of My Thought Is Overflowing
I missed the moment of life where I rested close to the river, the night of silence just the insect bugging the grass, the fresh air that made the leaves sway its leaves, and the river. The stillness made the river more alive it's like life was within him after the doom of darkness and massive lights from the stars and above. The flowing river and the relaxation. Then comes the rain after the massive thunder that gives light to the corner side. The river is more aggressive; the sound of the dropping rain is clapping with the body of whole water. A very fresh and fragile sensation. The moment where the body feels the emotion and the thought. The idea, and the words, create a sentiment within the life of the mind. The view is overflowing.
I had this question before and wanted to ask every one of us, what was the consistency of the writer? Does it look like we must write every day? Writing and dwelling daily basis is the only labeled as consistent we are? I think it's not; even a writer who wrote once a week nor a month could also be considered constant. Sometimes we become not active, and our minds freeze, yet that does not indicate we are not functional.
The thing that made us survive here is thoughts, ideas, and thinking of everything, the observation of other people, places, and the events that are just about to come and near to end. We loved to write them down, spare the time, and just consider it shall be on the ground of breaking. But sometimes, thoughts are so rude, invisible, and stubborn. They come abruptly, yet they could just be gone quick. The ending is left alone with unanswered and half-finished. The river of thoughts is sometimes stagnant as it was, might some strange particle as a barrier to flow.
THE RIVER OF MY THOUGHT.
Where did my thought come from? It's actually from the streams inside of mine; it's a closed venture of my nature and existence. The river provides the atmosphere and the humidity of my mind. Human is close to the heart; they said that water is blood, imagine a soil with no water? The land will be dead and barren. Imagine life without a river inside? Thirsty and longing even just underflows.
Thought and emotions.
Emotions control everything. It's not easy to write a happy topic when you are sad. It's not easy to contrast a word when you are tired. It feels like everything becomes a sudden piece of unknown. I loved how the emoji was created and randomly became a trend. Where you could find the emotion, you want to show to them. But that made the real emotion fake. A sad one could just comment with a happy one and laughing emoji, surprised even you already knew it.
But in thought, you can not cheat the emotions that easily. Takes a deep second to reconcile all the things.
When I am consumed with so much black and muddy colored water in my head river it, it's hard to fake my thought and write. So I was just absent and chose not to. Pretending myself in writing is not that easy; it takes courage. Sometimes, I decide to bank thought in and save it for later.
Thought and the factors.
There are a lot of factors I considered in extracting my thought. **TIME** is one of them; I always look at the timings; who didn't?. I looked at when I started, and if half of the hours had already and my thought still undecided, I wouldn't continue, leave it for later. **ENVIRONMENT** is also a significant factor in opening up the gate of my overflowing rivers of thoughts; I had this spot where I always sit, and on the table sometimes in lop is the laptop. And also, **PEOPLE**, I am not that easy to be distracted, but I want to be away from people.
The idea where the thought is like a river is one I adored much; it feels like nature really gives me the presence I need to write. Why it is better to have endless thoughts rather than a topic?. Honestly, all my writing is a sudden emigration of ideas that leads to the case. Creating a topic is easy, but when your thoughts and feelings aren't aligned, it results in a dull and stagnant momentum.
If you want to overflow the thought inside. I suggest you should feel that you were in the river. As my introduction, I honestly missed that moment in my life. Stay and rest beside the river in the middle of the night, with nothing but rest assured. I was still young, yet I wished to come again.
Water is overflowing, thoughts are committed, and time to write.
Thanks for reading…
Landslide: Is Solid North Dead or Alive?—The Results.
Victory as the majority cast a vote and did the right to choose whom they think the best among the best—loss but not lost for those who didn't get the chance. I am not talking only about the President's seat but also the local position; I am not talking about winning but the new chapter of challenge. I won't blame or talk back bad things for the sake of truce. After the election, the poll decided who won and who lost. It's now time to evaluate the years to come. As they said, for most of the vote is given, Landline is a flowless victory as millions of people decided to choose who will be the leader to usher for years.
Congrats to the elected officials and the supporters, of course. Politicians won't make the finals if no one supports them indeed, especially the people who fight and battle just for their preference.
Last night was the counting of the vote in a local election. I was there; we went to three schools from different places to look for a result of the one we support. He was my uncle's boss, and I couldn't say 'NO' to my uncle; he needed someone with him as he expected to finish late.
Indeed a peaceful election in our place, for there was no hate crime and bullying report. People are open to looking for a result; unlike the past year, the night after the voting will make the space crowded. But with the help of upgrading technology and creating more decentralized data using the internet. Some people prefer to stay at home. They could check the maximum number and the percent of finished from time to time.
It was still a pandemic, and liquor ban, yet I could still see people who had no facemasks and smelled like beer in their shirts. After checking the three schools, we had to wait at the municipal hall for different results. Our candidate for Sangguniang Bayan lost the game, and it was indeed a loss to me. I lost one of my connections. But that's fine. There was still another, I think, who knew me.
It's a landslide victory for Bong Bong Marcos as the progress shows no significant changes in the gap in the rivalry.
The Solid North
The solid north is the land of Ilocania, where I belong. The solidarity upon the Marcoses has been written for many years now. It was the place where people loved the Marcos very much. Especially farmers and fisherfolk. An Ilokano from a vein.
**Cagayan, Region II.**
It's not only the Ilokano but also Ybanag residing in this place; it's not a myth that for solid north is stronger than before. In Cagayan province, BBM gathered 552,554 votes, leading for a record. 98.89% at the moment of completion of the transmission.
**Isabela, Region II.**
The home of Ilokanos' Igorots' and Ifugaos.' Most of the land here is flat and filled with rice fields as the farming benefited Marcos Magat Dam. Not only Isabela but the closed provinces. Magat Dam Reservior greens the plants, and the electricity of ISELCO planted to it. I am from here. BBM got the total vote after 99.37% having 685,329 of the natural voters' preferences.
**Pangasinan, Region I.**
also a land of Ilokano speakers, one of the highest vote producers in the solid north. with completion of 99.49% of the province return. BBM got 1,292,432 votes that inclined to the peak.
**Benguet, Cordillera Administrative Region.**
The land of Igorot, the Iloco, and Igorot had the same similarities in their language; it's a strong point if you are Ilokano and learning the dialect of the Igorot tribe. BBM got 116,450 vote.
**Ilocos Norte, Region I.**
The land of the windmills. The residence of Marcos. BBM got 355,730 voters with 99.88% completion of the returns.
**Nueva Ecija, Region III.**
My birthplace and the place where Ilokano had converted to Tagalog, lol. BBM got 942,155 votes in the land of the agriculture research center and the location of the agriculture development university (CLSU)
**Nueva Vizcaya, Region II.**
Ilokano also resides in this place, so BBM got 200,111 votes as 100% completion of the electoral returns.
Last night, I looked for the result and slept late to embrace who would win and govern personally. Many issues are again coming, like Robin Padilla as the lead man, mind that the majority wanted him. Also, he was a peacemaker to Islam-Filipino; it is an excellent time for our Islamic co-Filipino to now hear their soul in the senate.
Like my writing, the partial and unofficial vote count within 96.82% completion of the 2022 leading candidate is Marcos with 30,710,158.
Solid north is still alive.
Data gathered at: https://halalanresults.abs-cbn.com https://halalanresults.abs-cbn.com/local/nueva-vizcaya
Undervote: Why I Leave Some Slot as Blank In My Voting Ballot?
The blessing of independence and democracy is to vote and or not to vote. Had you been voting as it was your right? Voting for someone must not be someone is forcing or controlling you; the poll must never dictate by others, not for sale, and even you received just calm and shade what you think was right. Voting shall not because they will hate you of voting him you shall vote her. I leave some as undervote as it is my right to do so; it's not an end or a diminishing to my request to waste a chance?. I vote my right for what I think will never be wrong as it's mine.
My nails had now ink on them, from is natural and expected after I brought my copy to the machine and the machine reads it. They will give the semi-permanent one, but I think it's not that strong ink; after leaving and putting public alcohol near the prescient, the ink faded.
From the president down to the party list, I voted for whom I think would hand the fortune. I heard others say they leave the party list as "Undervote" because they don't feel its presence, the chateau, or the governing position. I don't know the rules of the party list in the senate yet; I could research that later to avoid the "let me educate you" scheme.
One thing that I enjoyed was that hearing other people talking to each other; some had reasons others were teasing. Of course, we were different in what we supported the president, but the unity of "Solid north still present as they smiled, leaving the precinct with a hand sign of red color. One pastor within my line made the hot climate in a good mood as he joked about things that made everyone smile.
Even if it's not your supported candidate, whoever wins must be clear that they will be the 'our president,' not a reason for de-diving.
One true story from it made me wonder what would happen the next day? The reality is that there were a wife and husband's choices to separate because of their political color. Some mothers and children had separated from their homes, and hate and more crime happened as the other supporters were so much in support that they could make themselves a picture of something.
That must be a truce now; I just kept wondering about the future of influencers who battled on social media after the elections?
I went to my prescient at 12:30 PM thinking that I would be on the line of the afternoon early birds, ended I was wrong. But the patience of everyone made us count the right given. My attendance number paper called at 02:32 PM for some restrictions also must be followed. Before entering, a social distancing that clear, rubbing alcohol is a must, and it's all implemented. I think I stayed inside the room for only 10 minutes; that's quick, for I left the other as "Undervote," as I mentioned in the title.
President and vice president are present, and 12 slots for senatorial candidates were cleanly shaded with the technical pen for the score. Down to Mayor, they are three dueling in the position I chose whom I know had a clearer vision, added that his candidacy also supported with the religious sector of INC, Vice-mayor also I knew his personality for we once talked in the municipality. Then comes the SB or Sangguniang Bayan; I only voted for one. It was considered black voting, but he was the only candidate who ran for my head.
I also left another blank; there was a position that it has only one candidate. Indeed they will surely win in the counting for no one tried to compete with him. But that doesn't mean he will be the eye of the duty. Also, he could evaluate people's preferences; he might win the election, but the thinking that some of the results tally. It will also show, and soon enough, he will recap whether his fellow citizens will like him for that position. You shared the ballot if you want him, not if you don't.
That's the right and the freedom of choice; shade it if you want and not for the algorithm and number could make them evaluate themselves. Politicians also look for statistics.
Politics who want politicians won't end until the term ends; more and more will come.
Congrats to all who participated and gave the vote for the deserving one. We shall be part of the change. As for me, my voice contented, and I know I practiced my right for doing a vote on what and whom I liked. The day shall be great for new officials to come and let abide whoever wins.
Whoever wins, let's pray that it's for everyone's good. We support it or not, thanks for reading.
Too much topic about the election, right?. I vote for my rights; it won't change that until the next six years ahead.
I Am A Guy, But I Want To Become A Mother, Not Father.
Would you believe me when I say that there was a man who wanted to be a mother, not a father? Sometimes it's not about the gender anymore. That's the position of some who wished just to become a loving mother instead. A man who becomes a mother, actually that's not new stories for we heard enough, we watched many stories of guys who become a mother, the part of life where they don't care about the gender, they don't look for a label just that they wanted to give everything to their children.
*Happy mothers day to all, whether you might be a birth mother of your child or not. Those who had no child yet did the course of motherhood. Those brother and sister people had the picture and gave the version of being a woman of the family. A day to remember everything, a day to enjoy and relax. They all deserved the love and care for their day and every day.*
Enough with the introduction of the rationale.
When I was young, I wrote an essay in school titled **"I WANT TO BECOME MOTHER, NOT FATHER."** I was still learning English at that time, and I know that I made a mistake in my title, which should be **"I WANT JUST BE LIKE MY MOTHER, NOT MY FATHER."** In genitalia and science, I won't be a mum; I am a guy, so it must be a father. The sad thing is that my teacher back then didn't correct my mistakes; they focused much on a bright student, not a lousy guy like me. The title is all about, and I won't be a mother, yet I will be a father soon.
But that's made me write an idea for today; there will always be a guy who wants to be a mother. Gender is just a label to some, and whatever happens, they are happy to be like that no matter what. There was a gay who wanted to be a mother at one point. An older brother who once sacrificed his love for somebody to be a mother of his sibling after their mother passed away. And some great fathers chose not to look for another woman after their wives just went out within their family lives—many stories and a lot of summarised to tell.
If the time comes, I will have my own family, and their mother happened to be gone (for instance). I will accept that I shall be a mother and father full-heartedly. I shall focus on my child future and watch them grows. That's what made me feel comfortable, by the way.
I WANT TO BECOME A MOTHER, NOT A FATHER.
Becoming a mother must be a turning job for sure; all the effort and time becomes just a little sacrifice in the face of someone. It might be an exhausting job that leads to physical and mental tiredness. They are like powerful heroes inside the home. They are the army that weaponised; some mother mouth somehow associated with shut-gun or Armalite especially those talking too much, right?.
I also thought I got jealous of another mother; who doesn't?. a child's mind is powerful when they feel powerless. A young boy will always look for adventure, thinking, what if she wasn't my mother? Will the life of my playmate become mine? As the wishes turn to lesser things. Then what if I lived without her? That's a moment in my life trying to be beloved. Then it all comes into reality: I leave her, and I must live independently. That was college, and things began to mess up.
I remember the first day when I must stay in the college room afternoon, and the sun began to rise. I think I missed someone; the room and bed beside were filled with nothing but the luggage that had never yet opened. I began to miss her, particularly that dinner time next; I don't know but eating alone at the dorm that time is weird; it is like you are complete in a single bite of the food my mother prepared as she knew I would land to the next chapter of semi-independent. That night was full of something strange, and my body was still climatising the environment. Then here is the idea of going home. That's happened to me, darkness and night. There was an idea of going home inside of me.
I think I saw nothing that connects to every mother anywhere. Someone, a stranger became our mother in school as we ate in her restaurant; she had the embracing energy of a mother like she saw that we were longing for our mother. She even called us her 'child,' which makes the connection and the respect come to her. In the afternoon and at dinner, she will provide food for us and even give us things for free.
That's not one scene I think I saw that connection. Even my friend's mother gives the same. The fact thing is that all my mates are we are all mama's boy, that might connect us in any distances. Two of my gang also don't like what our father looks at and gives us.
I wanted to become my mother, to break the chain that I encountered as a younger me. I don't want to become like him; he was like my grandfather. And I promised myself that my son wouldn't have the same thing as I saw in his paw.
That's why I loved my mother and those mothers who gave me the love of being their children. Soon as I became one, a father indeed, yet I wanted to have the heart of a mother. Isn't that beautiful that a father with a heart of a mother?
Thanks for reading
*This is written the second time; the first material is just gone and not saved. LoL, thanks to God for guiding me to the light and not damaging the laptop. LOL
HAPPY MOTHERS DAY to everyone, especially a mother of own child, caring other child, and those fathers and older sister or brother who is the picture of a caring mother. Friends and people who choices goods for others. May the Lord bless our mothers on this day. Good morning...
Sometimes I Told Myself That I Regret Falling In Loved
Are you in loved? Have you been in love? Do you have the feeling of being loved? Well, some will say they have been in love with their crushed or their idols; others again spoke of the reality that holding the feeling also meant enduring the pain. Keeping the relationship to last also, you chained your left foot in such a bitter taste moment. Then come others who give up what they called falling in love, then at one point, they said they regret losing into it.
I met several people and talked to them when the boring times, one thing that I always curious about is, had they been fallen in love? Whom and what was the story behind it?. I always asked people why they married that person and the story behind the marriage. Does it because they fall in love with each other?. But some people had told me, being younger, that if they had the chance, they wanted to come back to the moment where the heart feeling is about to fall not yet to love because they regret doing it.
Within my personal story, that hasn't happened. I never regraded falling in love, but there was something I think I wanted to diminish, and if I ever had the time machine to come back, I wish to behold tight. Suppose there is a chance I want to be more than just it. Falling in love means you don't know what real fantasies are. Being in the spell of what we call love is like ecstasy that is just coming to the float off the oceanic plate.
But again, that is just a fantasy because a loved person will never be easy. We wanted to bar the boundary, trying to lock that person. We began to be jealous of everything. So when you were in love, it was customary to get jealous; it was okay to get mad at some people for they like crossing your territory. You wanted to protect the relationship you had. You wanted to become the guard of your loved ones. So sometimes, falling in love is not a potion but rather poison.
Do you become sleepless thinking about why they never called you back? What happened?. Until that, it feels weirder and becomes something. You kept thinking about it. Some people often think they are cheating on them, which might be because they did that sometimes and afraid of being repeated. That's the position of a second chance. You were together, but you keep thinking about the past, the history. Pretending that everything was now fine, but at the night where you never hold the one, come the time of repeated dreams, the nightmare of cheating, and the horror of trusting that person.
Still, I am familiar with the saying that "intelligent person becomes dumb when they are loved." I thought when I was young, it was impossible. Not until I felt the thing personally. I began to experiment and looked for evidence within my experience, looking for the record of people within me.
Falling in love becomes a poison, not a potion.
I never said it was terrible to fall in love, ladies and gentlemen. Being in the state of mind of happiness and absorbing the power of love is so much addicting. That's the reason why some wanted to fight for love.
That's the title, just sometimes. But when I remember all the things, the greatness and power of being inspired in loving and admiring someone, things began to chase. **MAYBE I REGRET LOVING SOMEONE, BUT I NEVER REGRET FALLING IN LOVE.**
Falling in love makes you something that covers up many things; you won't feel the tiredness when you see the one smiling at you; even if the world is so loud, you still could hear nothing but a butterfly in your inside. Especially when she holds your hands, the power of gesture and smile, the ecstasy of someone calling your name, or what name she gave you, it was so much that things were a matter of just happiness.
I also fall in love with another love story, like every one of us. We were fond of listening to and viewing the story of the author, some stories are natural and fictitious, yet we found the deal of believing what the feeling of being loved was. The crazy thing that comes inside is when we remember the scene from the movie we watched—wishing that it would come into reality.
It's normal to have regret in the ending; that's a typical case for we cannot do that in the first scene but just when we look out the finale. The finale makes us thinks that regret will follow.
I am honest when I say sometimes I regret falling in love; more accurately, I regret slipping involved with someone. But that regret leads to a memory, memories that I will hold forever. A scene inside that inspired me to write this one, live long and not make mistakes again. Does it feel like I won't be serious to anyone who comes next? I don't know; maybe that was for another story to tell.
We learn from regretting that for sure.
Thanks for reading
What If We Could Redo, Refresh, and Reboot Our Mind?
Sometimes I wish that I was a robot, don't you think the same thought? Everything comes abruptly, and you don't know how to manage the complete task? You can't perform the duty of absorbing them all. Maybe there was also a higher version of humans. Some are still stuck in low RAM, while others are smart enough, and they are the individuals with high RAM in their heads. They have this increased storage capacity where they know how to control what things come and go. While others who were not that smart like others just wished that even we had a small piece of RAM, we could refresh and reboot it at least? But reality again strikes its arrow where dictates that we are not a robot; we are just a human.
No one would know; no one should see. Sometimes we all live in peace where we look at something we don't understand why it looks mesmerizing and catchy, yet it is just a piece of nothing. Like the ceiling of my room, what was in there that I loved to see? What was in the window that, even I have seen almost every day, I could still find myself looking at it endlessly? Or not that position, just the mind that is doing it.
We were trying to refresh our minds; we wanted to cool down a little bit, like a computer of old versions. You can't perform the task more than you want. There will be a logged-in system. Unlike the laptop we had, we could command the keyboard to refresh, and we could cool the system down by resting the PC in the meantime. But the mind? It took a minute or sometimes a couple of times and days to become fresh.
Crying is the command to refresh?
Did you feel that it feels like you have the feeling of refreshed for a while after crying? Do you realize why you should call? Then you stopped yourself from doing it, smiled, and as things came naturally, you dared to return to the task and do the things you missed because of sobbing.
Someone told me that crying could ease the pain when I was young. When we stopped crying, the pain also stopped; that pain was just inside our minds.
Is sleeping a command for a reboot?
I had trouble sleeping. That is a fact thing about me. I got insomnia from my stubbornness when I was a teenager.
But sometimes, when we were too tired and wanted to regain the energy we just lost, what were we loved to do then? We slept. We were resting the physical and mental for rebooting. Even the computer took time to reboot, so shall we rest for a period of just calmness and relaxation? Regain the lost energy and the feeling of uncertainty.
When we get so much pressure, it feels like a reboot won't work, or it's so hard it hung, and we just wanted to unplug it from the power instead. We wanted a shortcut to feeling the rebooting command quickly; that is why some people skip life for it's so hard.
Redo has no command.
We were not a computer for the sake of it, so in reality, what we did won't easily change; it will mark a scratch in our lives forever. Those mistakes cause discomfort to others, the broken pieces we give, and sometimes the torn word we say. But also, there will be edits; the mind can edit things by not making the same mistake and act; the reason had cloud storage where what happened and what lessons we learn are bank to that storage.
It's not easy to trick or command the mind; sometimes, the reason is the one that controls us. Did you feel the same way when you don't know where it comes through? You had no idea why it just came into our head?
The brain has the power limitless, human brain invented the computer, but computers now are more intelligent than people. Sometimes we want all the things to be done by a robot, on a programmed computer that shall give us the validity.
The actual shortcut and command to redo, refresh and reboot the mind is being away a little bit, being just with yourself and not disturbed by others. It's hard and figurative to do so because the reason is something unpredictable. It also could refresh its own even if we did nothing, could reboot the same way as the mind understands you more. That's come within this creative write-up.
If we were not a robot and the computer, then there shall be no shortcut command, yet there is a key to do that, via manual and doing it within ourselves.
Rest and give time to heal; you will embody the feeling of being re-new.
Sometimes I wished I was a robot, but also I wanted freedom and free-thinking. That's how I start to clean my head like a computer. Upgrade if needed.
Thanks for reading.
Mama rabbit is feeding her kits.
It is my first female rabbit that bare child, I just started though but I still had three females waiting to deliver there kits hehe. Well just a practice thou, for June will be a road to giant. My giant male breeder will be matured next month... Yayy
Anyways I had 15 rabbits now. Lol
One VICE Documentary about boys in Malenesia must proved first that they are real men before they be called a man lead me to creating this article which I published this morning hehe. If you had the time I invite you to read and let me hear your comments. Good day.
https://read.cash/@Eunoia/alpha-male-how-to-label-if-the-male-is-the-real-man-ba9140e1
Alpha Male: How to label the male as the real man?
In the real world and society right now, we love to label everyone; we want to give them the impression and the ideology of who is honest and fake. In the natural life, there was real, and there was a fake, also in gender. Not to be biased just that I speak reality more than the fantasies. We look for real men and women in masculinity or testosterone level. Some had joined the rainbow flag where they represented themselves as straight, bisexual, or the third gender.
***This article is not a gender-biased or provoking one, but this is something merely thought that visits me at night.***
I watched just an hour ago a documentary of people of Papua New Guinea where boys should show they are worthy of becoming a man. It's a deal for them, for it will picture the superiority of their kind to the tribe. They do everything just to be labeled as men, for they have become worthy of having a wife and child. For those who cant show that they are authentic, something happens and is shameful in the face of another kind.
In the documentary of VICE titled **"Becoming a Man in Melanesia,"** they picture an old tradition where the tribe will label them as real ones. They must jump in a high tower with just a rope from the jungle; the higher, the better, for they don't see fear in reflecting. They made this every year. The other tribe picture that he must catch a shark before being labeled as a natural and strong man with his own hands, the next one need to be a good hunter and animal gatherer in the forest to join the group and become a man in Melanesia.
Could you imagine that there is still a group or tribe that preserved the tradition where men should show up first that they are real ones, they are strong and fighters.
Same as today's culture, inside the doom of it add lights in people judging eyes. Men should show that they are real men. Today, you can't see who is honest and who is not at first sight.
But what were the criteria for becoming a real man? Is that the abs or the biceps?.
The Masculinity.
Men should be masculine; well, that label where men should picture their body as the figure of men. That's how Romans might find the real men, look at the sculptures and the picture shown, where masculine men show attraction to women, for they will be a picture of real men. That mind condition still yet preset these days, still a view of some so people could pay for this trend.
Masculinity not only for the abs and triceps and biceps of the body but also the skin's color.
What shall the color of skin be for real men? These should be brown or black, so some white guys wanted to have brown than white. Yet, in the place where I belong, some men prefer to look white because that makes girls more attracted. Shall the idea and skin color represent who was real and not? From my observation, most straight guys prefer dark or brown skin, and they don't want the soft glass color for some; the burned sun skin was a product of being a man of the family.
You could sometimes see that our father doesn't care for what they look like but for what shall give you a look. The father who chose to burn the skin shall and must be worthy of being a real man—approved.
The Testosterone Level.
We can't hide the fact that some people label men by the count of testosterone levels. The capacity for them to duplicate, have a child of their own. That's why some men who cant produce children had pressure when they met their campaneros', and the topic is all about children. The man who couldn't build his own had this worthy thing inside his heart. Then comes the question of if he was a real man?
Honestly, men think they are superior to others when they have more exes or children. This platform had dominated by females, and might not everyone knew about this kind of ideology.
If we could just cut the label to this one, it is better, but in real life, even if we wrote more articles and stories, this won't easily be out to other people.
Men should have their children for they will be real men, the person who can't is.
In the documentary, In their traditions, there God first created the shark before humans. Then Goddess told the human in the dreams that they must catch a shark for their food, but Goddess said to the shark, **"When human called you, go and give yourself. But only for those who s pure and real men".** To do this, men should clean his self. Create a wooden plank of the boat and the weapon to seal the ocean, but he must be pure. He sleeps with women and must eat fruit that birds never touch.
He just slept with a woman.
That will emphasize that the fancy he had must pay for the opposite of his kind. It's all about testosterone again.
Must eat fruit, never touch by bird.
It meant that he must look for food born in the uppermost tree, not the one that fell from it.
Labeled who was real and not got more superiority over others. That is how they see who was alpha and the loss.
It might be easy to say, but there was a dilemma in labeling who is a real man. Thanks for reading.
Thank You, Noise.Cash for preserving my friend's memory. My article for today is all about my lost love. Upon losing my previous phone also lost a lot of photos, and one of them is my pets picture. It was so tragic if I lost all of them thankful I there is noise who back me up hehe.
What to read my today's article and more?
https://read.cash/@Eunoia/thank-you-nc-for-keeping-my-friends-memories-36952c19
Thank You, NC, For Keeping My Friend's Memories.
MAY 2, 2022
Fact thing about me is that I value friendship very much; I could offer even myself just for a friend whom I know is real and genuine. I could do impossible things to keep that relationship, and I could even change what I am just for friendship. Is it martyrdom? I guessed it's not. Because I am also hidebound from looking for friends, we could say that everyone could be a friend, but only a few could be real friends. So, when I knew and felt that someone was honest in what he showed if they showed nothing but real things to me, I must keep them no matter what.
I have the same feeling with my friend, who has been with me for four years now. She gave me nothing but unconditional love and the best of things. She couldn't speak, but you could feel happy with me; she knew how to thank me for whatever I could give to her. This friends of mine that I lost, but I had the things within me, the feeling that she never let go, she was still there or just me that not yet moved-on for every morning I am looking for her that wagging her tail waking me up in my bed. I can't forget the name of when I fed her sibling's dog, and I still say her name.
Upon losing my phone, I also lost lots of memories. I also loved taking pictures with my friends, men, and animals. I lost those pictures inside the phone. Then I was bored and just looking at the ceiling. It just popped out, and I realized that I had a photo. I keep it somehow. I tried to look on Facebook, but nothing was there; then, a friend opened up about the noise.cash troubleshooting. I realized where I posted the photo.
When the site was fine, I decided that I won't stop until I found that photo. I scroll down gently, for I don't know when I posted that. In just my head, I remembered that, yeah, I made some microblog about her a month or year-long ago. It took me 30 minutes, and I found it; I don't know, but I felt strange. I knew it was happiness and nothing more. I found out that I posted it eight months ago; imagine that scrolling for a single photo that I posted eight-month-long.
https://noise.cash/u/Eunoia
Not everyone could understand how it was to lose a friend, even if they say just a dog. It took me two days to finally moved on. It also added to my anxiety that why the hell a lot of things are losing this year is a bad omen trying to cast within me?. That's one of the reasons why again, I was absent for two days here; the moment I type, I look somewhere.
It's not easy. What do people see if I cry just for a dog?
When I was in college, I thought I was such an evil man when I laughed when my friends just came to my dorm asking if he could stay for the night?. Their house was just a kilometer away from the university; why, just so suddenly, did he want to visit? I looked at him. I never questioned him, for I see that he just cried. I just kept the things went, prepared dinner for both of us, for that time some of our pals had already gone home for it was Friday night.
Times flew, and he said what happened. He just found out that his uncle butchers his dog. Sorry for that, but that's also happened here for some people who are still ignorant and cruel. He burst with anger but chose to leave and again went to school to let the feeling lay low a little bit. I just laughed secretly, I don't know, but maybe because I saw him crying; he was one of the gangster frats who always wanted trouble, yet he was emotional.
We spend the night with beer with us on the calm and fresh air rooftop. I just suddenly missed that, just the two of us drinking beer, talking about life. He was also one of my very few friends until now, and I just said that I valued friendship very much and could do things for my friends. He always called me boss, and he promised that until the end, he could d call me that callsign. I am not proud of what we did in college, but I am still proud of him, knowing he graduated on time. Back then, he felt that topics wouldn't absorb by his mind, I was the reason he passed all the exams, and I did some of his research papers (of course, just the data and book, he made the experiment).
Have you watched the "bad genius "? Haha, we made that.
I wanted to keep the photo forever; as I screenshot the picture, I knew that the quality wouldn't be as good as the original, so I just ran it to photoshop to increase the size and quality. Soon I wanted to keep and print it, as I don't wasn't. The memories we shared will just come in none.
Thank you, noise.cash for keeping my friends memories, I was careless to lose my phone and pictures inside, but I am still grateful that some backup happened. Thanks for everything.
Good evening; yeah, I'm still alive, haha. Good evening everyone, and here I am, some people might not know me now for a long absence, but here I am again with something tonight, lol. How was your day? Hmmm, do you still know me? Hehe
Happy 1st Anniversary: I Am Not Eunoia, But I Am Eunoia.
Happy birthday to my virtual self, a year with a bitcoin cash and an entire life with SmartBCH. I hope that all your dream Eunoia will come true, your desire and plan the most, will be provided at a perfect time, and all your admiration and hope shall become a reality. Every challenge is a gift. All the trails are a bridge to unlock the limitless thing inside, and I am happy that you are a year old now; I am glad to meet you. I love you, Eunoia, and that will stay over a year and a decade for sure. I will carry all the memories and love we shared.
At today's blog, it's a day of Eunoia. I was shocked and glad to see that the active status of my account had the label "Year user." I greeted the Eunoia. But who is Eunoia, and who is behind the name in this avatar? I love science fiction movies and series, and one of them is "Avatar," where when he sleeps in a sleeping capsule, he is somebody else. That happened to me when I created Eunoia. I could escape reality to fantasy, turn the universe into a metaverse, and make things that are limitless in everything, like the meaning of the word EUNOIA a wise man, or beautiful thinking. I created the name first at Noise.cash, then migrated to this. I am not eunoia, but I am eunoia.
I am not eunoia but I am eunoia.
I was in college when I encountered the word Eunoia in a book. I loved it and searched for what the meaning was. How did you read my username, by the way? Eyun-oi-a? Whatever the reading you made for me, it's Yu-noy-ya. Look at it, a-e-i-o-u-n sounds familiar. In my time, that was the first alphabet kinder school introduced. The word is beautiful like thinking, and they called a person Eunoia if they are a writer, poet, artist, and anything that user mind as the power.
That's it, I am Eunoia in the username, but I am not that Eunoia in real life. I could be, but I chose maybe not to, or I just don't yet found the real motivation to call myself a wise man, for I did many things in the past that want a worse of all.
But creating my avatar and signing in within this site, I could be Eunoia. I am a mind thinker; beautiful words that come to my head could be pastel painted on the canvas of cast keyboards.
Eunoia is so such a unique name. I planned that when I am a father of my own, I will call him Eunoia if he is a boy. I also like the nickname my friends here made; they called me "Yonong" it sounds unique to me, but I won't own that, for the name was reserved for my future man. What if girl? I wanted to have the Eunola (Yu-no-la)
instead. The letter "L" changed the 'I' and had her nickname as Noyla. Agreed or disagree that they are cool names, yeah?
I want to thank everyone as my journey starts and never ends here on this anniversary. I remember the old time when I was afraid to publish my article. I was scared of people, like a newbie too. One person believed that I could be a blogger here. His name was Bjorn, a sir who had first seen me. I also wanted to do the same to others, especially to a user with great potential. I tried to help them, so what if they surpassed me? I don't care. Next is my batchmates here, I had a batchmate of people with who we created an account within the same period, but sadly, not all of them stayed; Ms. Elli or Ellechcim is one. To my very first besfren forever here Zhyne06.
Here's the story behind the friendship between the two of us. It was all mistakes, for I thought it was Ruffa, for I am not familiar yet with the names. She wrote about the article about her best friend's boyfriend that this boyfriend had confessed that he liked Zhyne06 and could result in a friendship over? Haha. Ruffa is the first person who upvoted me with a high amount of $0.50 for starting a guy like me, which was huge money. Yeah, I could remember all the things; that's my gift. The more time passes, the more it feels fresh in my mind.
I can not mention everyone; my first pal here is the Noise and read: my brother Review, a handsome boy who loved tradings. Oh, my frenemies Expertwritter, it also turns years of our virtual friendship. The story behind the company we made is that she chated me asking "How to confess with her crush" I think she made many of them so far—MommyKim who has been with me all the time both Nc and Rc. To Ayanechan thought I was gay in her first impression. And everyone who becomes part of the life of Eunoia.
A year with you is something that I am proud of myself.
Let us cheer to thy name Eunoia, a wise man. Happy birthday my friend. Thank you for everything, for I am not who I am today, especially in the crypto world, without you.
I love you, Eunoia, and every one of you.
The actual author is not Eunoia, but he is also a beautiful mind. Thank you for a year full of randomrewarder blessings.
Newborn Rabbits Turn 7 Days Old: How They Look From D1 to Now?
Last April 22, 2022. I woke up and took my coffee, and then I found my way to visit and feed my rabbits. I was shocked that there was a fur scattered in a cage of one of them, I listed the first attempt as an error for it was messed up, and I didn't expect that one of them would give me satisfaction. I was excited and used the male rabbits too early and the female as the standard age and weight. The thing is that June must be the breeding season, and with my excitement, I decided that I shall make it quicker.
I am not afraid of loss, and I want to learn every aspect of my life. Even I could sacrifice some of them just as a result of the study. Don't get me wrong, but it will save more in the following years and times to come. I thought that I would lose one of the six kits but ended up that it was the reality that the milk of rabbits has a healing effect. This blog will show you the transition from day 0 until it reaches day 7. In the spoiler, there also be day 14 until winning on day 30. Shall we start?.
Breeding rabbit is not easy, especially for me because I am too much in planning; I want to gain experience before I execute my actual plan. The thing is that I wanted to raise a vast type of breed. The breed is giant, but I don't want to lose money; they are expensive, so I will be bankrupt if I jump into the real deal without a good experience and fail. So I started from a small type or the local one.
My breeding practice will gradually change in June, for I will raise a hybrid one in the following season. I am a material of PS100 (Parental Stock). They could reach 5-7 kilos in their mature age. He will be the next king of my rabbit colony; then, I will buy a breed of giants when the time is ready. That's my goal.
Day 1.
On the first day, I don't want to disturb the babies. But there was something inside me that was also curious about what they looked like in eyes?. This attempt pregnancy was my first witness of the gestating rabbit, so I did some searching. I opened the fur nest and saw three little bunnies that looked like small birds, for their stomach were more significant than their heads. That makes them weird-looking, but that is how they gain nutrition.
Day 2.
I was surprised, for I was wrong; I thought they were only their tiny babies but were six little bunnies. Well, I was happy, for that is a jackpot for me. It will just make sure I will have more for the number of babies played could be within her genetics. On day two, the color turned to darker black. They were not born with a darker shade of black pigment at the delivery, but the first coat of their fur was blank, which is unclear.
I could overseed that they grew fast within an hour. That's actually how the mammary or the breastfeeding characteristic of the doe. The milk was full of nutrition from feeds and leaves, so if you have a rabbit, make sure that they eat grass, not just feeds.
Day 3.
I observed that the mother was in charge of taking care of her young; she released her fur and placed it more on the kits. They had yet no hair that covered and warmed their body, so the mother sacrificed to endure the pain of cutting her fur using her teeth. All animals forced to remove the covering hair is painful. Its shows that the mothering characteristic of my specimen gives me satisfaction. I won't easily give up on her.
Day 4.
These rabbits are now active. They were jumping and practicing their legs. That causes the fur to vanish within the act of jumping. Naturally, a rabbit's defense mechanism is for its legs to jump and run from the predators in the wild. I love watching them like shocked by a simple move of one sibling that will trigger their instinct also to move and jump.
Day 5.
The color becomes darker and shows the fur. A white mother was here, and the kit wasn't her color. In genetics, we have these recessive and dominant genes. Which just made a sign that now the shade of white becomes recessive, the other color becomes dominant or dormant. On this day, it was now safe to touch them, but of course, only the keeper to avoid the disturbance and panic of the mother.
Day 6.
The first coat color is out, and the accurate color emerged; it's not black but brown. But one is black; it's also pleasing that kits were the first black color in the colony. They are still blind these days of the count and depend on the instinct of strange movements so that they will jump off each other. It might also be a design defense mechanism, so when some strange animals cross their following, they will be shocked too.
Day 7.
Here are they now; I could observe that they all slowly opened their eyes and might be see some color or blur. It is a sign showing the best thing for it meant that chances of survival are now high for the fur began to develop and soon at the Day 14, they now could walk and join the mother to explore grasses and feed themselves.
Yeah, I enjoy looking at and contenting things about them, and I am excited about the future, with more experience and witness to adore. That's all, thanks for reading.
Could BBMarcos Jr. Bring Back P20 per Kilo of Rice?
Why you have to know this, especially if you are a Filipino, choosing the right leader and politicians is really in the heat these days, some are really on the demand of hate and vulgar crime, others just chilling and letting the enemy ruin their selves. But the reality is that whoever wins won't guarantee our survival at the end of the day. One thing again I read is that some people questioned the statement of the frontrunner BBM when he said he wanted that rice will reach a maximum price per kilo of 20 pesos. Others just laughed and questioned everything, is this kind of joke for farmers again could damage the profit?.
Well, I will try to explain to you and let us see if really BBM could bring back the 20 pesos per kilo controversy, you were in a good brain for I am an Agriculturist, and crops especially rice is my forte.
The answer to the question could really Marcos jr. could bring back? YES, he can. And here are some reasons.
Number one on the list is that he knew what was agriculture. Yeah from the way he speaks and talked the agriculturist knew that he was a highly open guy in the seasons. The province of Ilocos Norte is the model of modern farming produce. Number two is was a skilled person, he knew things that cover up plants, and number three is that he knows the economics of agriculture. The economic system of farming is very much different from other segments. Lending and borrowing is a really broad term when it comes to producing.
But I am not biased toward this article, not only Marcos could bring back a low price range of rice. But all of them or whoever will be elected. Just that one candidate had seen the problem and possible solution for now.
But how really it will happened? Simple these things will.
LESS IMPORT MORE EXPORT…
Do you know that we are a leading rice exporter back then, Thailand are the ones that benefit in the time of Ferdinand Marcos Sr. Because he managed to solve a lot of problems in farming. Other countries are coming to the Philippines to visit and look at the practices of the rice, number one scene that they wanted to look up is the Banaue rice terraces. But sad to say, we were now importing rice from Thailand at the moment. Not just rice but a lot of crops are now imported instead of exported.
The Philippines yet now still exporting crops such as Bananas, Pineapples, Mango, and many more but not rice.
To carefully think if 20 pesos could affect the farmers, here is the real deal. NO, it's not, yet because they wanted that to happen? Because it's not the farmer but the elites, who bought cheap price and sell it at a high price. If the government will look upon the idea of more purchasing projects from the government to farmers at a very reasonable price the price really will gradually lower.
If the government will buy low prices from the farmers? Could be a loss to them?. No, it's not.
Do you know why in the time of Ferdinand Marcos Sr. farmers don’t pay for the Irrigation system?. Yeah, the watering of the paddy field is free from expenses. But when the Aquino administration sits in the palace. Some government own project was sold to private people and one of them is the NIA (National Irrigation Administration). If the government won't oust VAT to the irrigation system in the Philippines and farmers won't have to pay for the irrigation, why they will protest that the raw price of rice is low if their expenses will be lessened or decreased.
And if the government will partner with rice farmers, it could also adopt the practice of tobacco farmers.
Do you know that tobacco farmers are enjoying the perks program of a private company, yeah the cigarette industry of the Philippines most of Luzon? The private company will look for a farmer who wanted to plant Tabacco, then they will provide everything. Yeah, they will give the seed, fertilizer, and many more. But in the enclosed deal, the company will give the peck of the price.
If you living in the city, Do you know that Tabacco farmers are rich because of this practice, why don’t give adaptation to the rice farmers? Simply because rice farming is so broad so the government shall be the one to look for this not the private people.
Looking at the idea of dropping the price of rice to merely 50% is laughable to the people on social media. But the farmers wanted that idea, we were waiting for that idea. Because when the government does all the possible solutions such as low seed prices (there is government own seed center), low price in fertilizer (even research center had own formulation of fertilizer, insecticide herbicide, and fungicide), free irrigations, farm to market road, subsidy and lending fund that will make the price drops.
Because the number one problem of the farmer today is high expenses and input capital, if whoever wins the election and focused on rice production. The idea of 20 pesos per kilo is possible or lower than 20 with help of scientists, researchers, and agriculturists, vote wisely and think about your food for the future. Thanks for reading...
Oww even though I am absent for a long time now and suddenly emerged, BCH still alive within my account hehe. Good evening everyone, and I comeback from the graveyard. Charrr
You’re Loyalty Won’t Lead To Royalty.
Had you heard the lyric of the song “Good guys never win” upon hearing that relating word I know there was something inside me that connected to these words. Seems like it really reflects the loyalty. Hmmm, sometimes we were too loyal and never think that there will a time when we will lose because of being too much loyal to the royalty. The thinking of being loyal to someone, a boss or even wife or anything, that loyal person somehow the person always loss. Why? Because loyalty becomes a bond yet never it was a headliner that will lead to royalty.
Last Sunday was a boom and a lot of things happened to me, one of these is a crazy thing my cousin-bestfriend doing. I had a nap in my room when she called me and she said she wanted me to treat her, come on another version of “There is the latest” thing happened again. I don’t know but why do they think I wanted to hear a latest happened to them? Hmmm and I was bored, I agreed to test her. Then comes the real thing, she just made a homemade pizza and wanted to just buy a drink instead. It was clear an Okinawa flavor with only 50% sugar of milk tea. Well, there was opened milk tea shop within walking distance to our same place and I said okay.
I brought milk tea to her place, and no one among her housemate was there. I asked where are they? She said she just skipped from his brothers' house and they are all there for some occasions. I look at her with a glaring look, so there will be a birthday occasion and she wanted me to treat her. She just laughed and she gets the pizza she made. Oww she made a pizza, I smiled back knowing that there was a treat from her lol.
Honestly day by day she was making good at cooking and baking, she wasn’t that kind of woman back then. We grow up together and become friends even at the age of four. Then went to the same kindergarten and even demand that we will be both on the morning schedule, not the afternoon, just when elementary we won't become classmates anymore, for she must repeats a grade 2 class. Well that’s made her devastated and people think of her as something else, but the bond between us never changes.
She get married early, and now they are separated. She had a child and she was a girl. Yesterday her ex-partner went to get the child for accompanying.
I just leave a minute and asked what was the thing? She looked at me and yeah I know what is going on. I know that she had something. She said she was just bored and the occasion will be night dinner. Not me, not until she said what happened.
She always promised me that just a chat, yeah she is flirting with a guy on just a chat, never give serious thing upon it. But something happened, the gay partner of the man she was flirting with within the chat, message her on Instagram and warm her. I don’t know but I can wind stand the laugh at what she did. Yeah, somehow that was a great thing so she will stop what she is doing.
Even just a chat as she promised but never gives me comfort. She said she is just playing a game with them. Oww, I am not conservative yet I am strict. Of course, her family doesn’t know what was happening just me. Don’t worry I advised her to stop the plaything she is making and even joked at her that finding a man who was far so much from her, and she smiled. That’s time I regretted saying a joke, I think she gets an idea from it.
In the story about loyalty, when I get home from my cousin. My aunt abruptly asked who was my mayor. I was cornered and said the other name, not the name she wanted. She looked at me like something, I asked what happened? She said that the other candidate for mayorship is looking for loyal voters to vote for him and gives us a reward. Oww, you know what I meant. She must erase my name for they think I am also a loyal voter to him but when she heard I said the other name they get disappointed.
I just laughed and said it's a prank, of course, I will vote for the same mayor they had haha lol, easy money why should I act like never need money haha. She looked at me and said okay, we must be loyal to that candidate.
Loyalty? Goodness, I just get the money and vote for whoever I want. Even if they will have a survey how could they know that I voted for him?.
Hmmm yeah, that reminds me of the lyric “good guys never win” oww I am not a good guy though haha.
I was loyal to someone before but ended a loss to myself. Haha
Thanks for reading…
Previous Article:
**Deliverance Healing** https://read.cash/@Eunoia/deliverance-healing-fefe5452
**I Watered The Plant This Morning; Because I Understand Them.** https://read.cash/@Eunoia/i-watered-the-plant-this-morning-because-i-understand-them-003ff0a4
**First rabbit breeding attempt: SUCCESS and FAILED.** https://read.cash/@Eunoia/first-rabbit-breeding-attempt-success-and-failed-faf9564a
**Bruh I am not emotionally fine.** https://read.cash/@Eunoia/bruh-i-am-not-emotionally-fine-a869bd5f
Deliverance Healing
Do you acknowledge that we were not the only living society in outer space? Like there are dozens and thousands of planets that were living distant away from us. Who knows that there are also people of the same kind that lived out there, also wondering what if they were not alone on a living planet?. Same as the topic for today, do you believe in God? The Messiah or Jesus?. How about the heavens and purgatory? The angels and demons? where angels could be a demon and bogeys could portray their selves as philanthropists? ***[Bogeyman: Legendary monster]***. One last question, do you believe in what they called the Ministry of Deliverance?. Well, now I believed it because I saw it with my eyes.
The more I become aging, I think more I must look for everything, I become curious and becomes more attentive to other beliefs. I don’t know but I was born with a curious mind I think, somehow I questioned things that must not be questioned far so fast.
We grow up hearing other mostly elders about we should be careful in where we get tough especially on an old tress with a huge slimed body, they said it was a paradise for supernatural and creatures we don’t see within our naked eyes, there was something inside that living like us, when they hurt or disturbed they could create chaos and make your body weak, sick and worst decay. Some said it was a myth, not really we had that kind of persona living inside the tress. It comes from the imagination of humans.
We all knew that our ancestor, especially in the Philippines, was the one that gives those ideas, but where does it come from?. Is it really just a horror story to be feared by a child or there is something that comes true?
Another this is being possessed. Well, I also saw something within me but might be that’s for another article for sure haha. How about possessed and bewitched? Do you believe in that kind of demonic act? Where a jealous woman could make your body or health worst because she had the power to summon the black shadow? The woman who told a rag doll and within a string of your hair, the needle could make sure you will be suffered?.
Some believed and others don’t. But in the religion of Christianity and any divided sector of the religion they had this “ministry of deliverance,” I met one group of a pastor who makes things like this. They are all pastors that had contact with each other and when something just come they joined their forces to regain strength and try to defeat the bad spirits as the enemies.
I saw the action within my eyes, one leader had this strong charisma. I don’t know but I could see that she wasn’t that ordinary woman who can speak a different native tongue and dialect. They are group op pastors and each one of them had their own talk. The service started with a singing and lively Christian music that was last for at least an hour I think, then comes the preaching of the pastor. Explaining that there was really a demon, within and all the supernatural, and she said that we should avoid this one. They were the exile angels that choices to betray God and joined Lucifer Morningstar to clash the goodness and choices the bad side.
So God exile them and separated them from the earth. Others had landed in oceans and sea and they become the demon of the water or mermaid, some landed in the mud and soils and becomes the ghost of the land, some ran and entered the tress and were afraid to get out and just stayed there forever. Angels are fallen, they were not an angel anymore.
The deliverance service made the actions, one pastor is talking in a language I can't understand, the other two seems familiar yet I don’t know what they talking about. Their hand is pointing at the head of the person, I could see in my eyes that the man felt something even thou he wasn’t touched by any of them. They are like battling with a different language, a lot of different rituals, and exciting mounting products.
Then there is also a medium. The pastor just looks at the medium and says something in her ears. Then the surrounding becomes dull. The woman possessed. Yeah, I could see that she was not normal she was. The pastor asked why she made this to him, and the answer is she was jealous, then the pastor told her to remove what she added. In just a glimpse of the eyes. I could see also that the size of the stomach was lessened. Unlike the things, I see before the service.
**Believed it or not, there are bad people out there who had the contract with the demon, and their task is to hurt people**. The demonic act happened everywhere, you might not believe it for now, but when also you see with your eyes as I do. Might be that’s for another opening for you too.
Thank you for reading, this is not fiction.
I Watered The Plant This Morning; Because I Understand Them.
You do believe that we have communed with nature, we were here for a reason and we understood the leaves, trees, and even grass?. Somehow it feels like that gift was already declining and that connection is somehow lessening. Yeah back then it was a fact that people and nature had a powerful bond together, nature is giving a sign and humans could foreshadow what will soon happen when nature gives the signal back.
In the Bible's relation to nature, back then the first man and women first saw nature when they spread their eyes. Nature or Eden gives them the things they need. Food and what the body needs everything. Yet they were also like us who were stubborn, they realign and God wanted them to leave the garden and permanently closed the “Garden of Eden”.
What if God chooses you to live in the Garden of Eden, where nature will the one that provides everything? Would you agree?.
In terms of agriculture, back then farming is so much easier to predict even without the satellite and phenomenal gadgets for predicting the weather. Humans just look at the skies and birds. When they see that lot of birds are flying from the east to the west, they have been expecting that night will be cool as the rain will drop soon. They don’t have wind control yet they could predict that the wind give them the season they want.
Even if they had no hydrometer and pH tester they could see how the land was rich in the nutrient because the color of the soil is dark and plants will grow even without using insecticides and fertilizers.
That’s how humans and nature loved each other back then, that’s how nature devised and predicted what happened.
There was also a time where when you were living in the province, flies and many bugs just come out from nowhere. Then comes the elder saying that it will rain soon, and after just an hour yeah it really rains. The insect living below the base had noticed and predicted that it will rain, so they come out of their shelter and look for someplace to survive in the heavy rain.
Why do the animals that once we labeled not intelligent as we know what will happen in the weather?. Because they don’t lose their connection of them with nature, why can't the human race that we belong to right now do the same? Because we ignored it, and by ignoring it losses naturally. Or because there was no tress right now. That’s the saddest part, nature is fading and the life we had don’t even notice it. Why? Simple because we were focusing on our own, and ignored other things.
I believed some of us, even had no idea about what was the current happening in nature? The carbon emission and synthesis of chemicals. Oww, they were living in a room safe, with an air conditioner so whatever happened if the temperature rises or drops they were safe in heaven. Are we all safe?
Why do I say I understand them?
Simple they were showing the sign yet we just ignored it. The plant was wilt, it meant they need water yet we just look at them not doing anything. The soil was toxic ow that spot better if they just established a housing project instead.
The more we become advanced in technology it comes we just let the machine do the work. That’s the insane thing that is reality right now.
That’s why they don’t want to understand the scientist who protests that nature is dying, it meant that the also their investment will die. Yeah, that’s happened for people investing money in technology, huge cash to a project. That’s why the phone is cheap today, lot of appliances is a bargain because they are designing more advance, smarter and cleaner design for the future.
It feels like the connectivity we had is not in nature anymore, it was on Wi-Fi and mobile data. We took pictures of the dying nature online yet do we make some changes in real life? Hmmm.
Yeah, the government shall not look for the environmental issues yet they also must be in agriculture. I loved how the presidential aspirant Bong Bong Marcos address the problem in the environment and connects it to agriculture. He said that introduction of more resistant varieties and even research for more for the better rehabilitation of nature. Well, I am a Marcos loyalist for the record.
Look closely for the connections, it losses now. We don’t know what was really happening in nature right now. We become blind. I just hope that nature will recover and she will forgive us, then again connects with our future generations, because honestly right now. It's impossible for us to reconnect.
Thanks for reading…
First rabbit breeding attempt: SUCCESS and FAILED.
**DISCLAIMERS: You again could read terms for Agriculture, Science breeding and Research type papers hehe. Sorry for that but that will make the article more real and more precise when it comes to the rationale of the paper. Thanks for understanding…**
I could say success even though just one subject yet showed significant results and the other two is que and might result in a high density of error to the subject experiment. Well that is how the result and I know the fact that experimenting and execution of the study was delivered projectile juvenile data. The study was conducted last March 2022, yet I found some variance of error in terms of age identity and maturity of two of the subject matter that leads to predicting variance of concern. That's to give a first projection that the first attempt of the study was labelled failed. Yet comes that result showing a small high degree of significant progeny.
Based of conduction:
The study was conducted to answered the following question:
**Does the age of female subjects affect fertility in mass production?**
**Does the age of male subjects have an adverse effect on the conception of female reproduction?**
**Does the age of male and female will lead to some error?**
On the contrary. The study began to show high insignificant differences in both three questions and the unveiling product of different variance for human intervention and inadequate data. The data gathered and compiled to solve the error square of the three female subjects. The research won't testify to the result and need further more look out in data and variance of solving the concern. In terms of research and the law that must include. The study conducted failed and could be recorded as loss.
I am sorry for that introduction haha, yeah I just wanted to list two different things, the lost and gain. In terms of research what was the result was really lost but in terms of my personal archives. I could say that it was successful. Yeah, because of observing and gaining experience I got what I wanted and in research, I could compile the lost and list what I did and not make the same mistake again haha. Yeah I found out the mistake that will lead me to another attempt later on.
That’s how I was, I wanted to becomes a researcher in my life. That’s what my calling, listing and solving data in my laptop, and will soon used that for further things in my very soon studies.
In informal talks, I will tell you what happened to my rabbits.
I was really surprised when I saw that my rabbit laid her kits. It was her first time, and I thought that what attempt I did was lost because I never considered the age of buck that I used not until I looked at my notes that the buck or male needs more than one month until it matures. So I really thought that I wont have any kits this month yet.
I introduced three females to one male. And she was the first one I bred, it just showed that there was no problem in my doing but I refused and gave the feedback to lose haha.
I woke up this morning of April 21 and after my coffee I went to feed the rabbits. I was surprised because I saw some features that were lost in the cage of one of them. Yeah that’s happened surprise. If I know that she will lay some kits I will prepare some nesting box just to warm the kits and protect them from harm. Yet it was late and they are sensitive to sudden changes so I don’t bring a nest box anymore.
I was curious how many kits she had. But with care I gently massage her first and bring the odor of her in my hand before I touch or open up the nest she made. It was morning and I saw three black kits from the nest. I thought it was all she got because I really didn't see or observe she was pregnant because her belly was so tonight no sign that she was pregnant and had a baby. Not until I looked again this afternoon and I saw six pieces of kits playing in the nest. Yeah I was shocked. I thought that she all had tree kits but ended but she laid more this afternoon. That shows that they could deliver their own child with even a high span of intervals.
It was her first time and she gave me six healthy and big size kits. Lucky me that the size of the litter didn’t get from their father haha. The father of the buck that I used was a small one. But I am a bit disappointed because it was a white mother and brown father yet they were all colored black lol. Well it's happened because they are all upgraded as they said in the pedigree lol.
So now I am looking carefully at the next one, I breed her just before him and she is now showing the same things like the other one before. Hmmm what if she also had a prolific line, the rabbit who just got her baby was her sister and the number of kits from them is highly genetic haha.
If you asked me how many rabbits I had now. Officially I have now 15 rabbits, and two of them are que waiting if they could lay some kits, and the other one is just bred. Hmmm sounds like I really need a huge cage for them haha thanks for reading…
Bruh I am not emotionally fine.
Physically fit and healthy wasn’t that enough, that’s why it's so dangerous sometimes if we just look at their physical and self and that’s defined, we were fine. That's what happened and surprised people that he or she looked fine and had no problems yet. It just comes in a moment when she or he ends things. You all know what I meant. Emotions are also important in people’s lives, physical, emotional, and spiritual.
When we say spirituality not only defined Godly things, in psychology, they also mentioned that they studied the body, soul, and mind. That explains the three things. So when you bring yourself to professionals they won't just focus on the emotions, also they look at and study your body, and what is inside your soul. Sometimes the soul defines the thoughts, what you like, and fine to do. They intercept the tree part and give prescriptions not only for the mind but also for the body and soul.
I admires one person here, who she shared her life and the emotions she had in the past days. The triggering and lingering thoughts, the undefined things in her heart, and the lightbulb image in her head. I really admire her for not shapely telling others that she wasn’t that emotionally fine, she had seen a breakthrough. I envy this kind of person who can freely express their thoughts. I am living in a real world where I just want to endure the pain within myself, not involve others in my own problem. I just wanted to be silent. Looking fine and smiling. But the real thing right now? Bruh I am not emotionally fine.
This actually happened to me a long time ago, but I never tell anyone. I also congratulate myself for being so much actor of pretending. There is a person who always asked how I am? Of Course, the reply will always be fine.
Why am I not fine? Thoughts and thoughts hunting me every night bruh, I don’t have that good time to rest like anybody here. So if you could rest fine and normal and raise the morning with good feelings, that’s the thing I missed these past days.
I also shared with you that this year was a year of unfortunate events, that’s from the beginning of the year I was subjected to huge heart burning problems, from losing my laptop to my phone, from my uncle to my grandfather. Yes, just that when we have done the funeral, my grandfather got an accident. And we were worried about what will happen to him because he was old now. I am one again who looked after him especially when he was in pain. It also added the emotion where I could see my grandfather flee and crying, and wishing that why he wasn’t just gone. That’s a huge cut in my eyes witnessed again what was just fresh from my uncle. Then again, one of our family members' clans died, he was just 8 years old.
Things happen to me and I was heartbroken everywhere. They don’t understand me, that’s because I do it myself secretly. I did things and help them without expecting a return. But I was disappointed with them, I was nothing compared to others.
When was the time when you saw yourself cry? For me, I don't want to look in the mirror. I don’t want to cry yet I could still feel the liquid coming out from it.
Sometimes pretending you're fine is always fine, well not everyone could agree but I did. Maybe because I am an adult and I don’t want to be another problem, I don’t want to be a source of undefining endeavor and laborious sputnik. I just want to endure things.
I also planning really to un-stall apps on my phone especially Facebook. I have ever been fond of sharing posts yet I saw myself why does the pain of the post and meme they shared seem like I knew that feeling? Why does it feels real what was the pain of the writer of the post, then added that I was so curious about the comments, and comes again the feeling of “wow I know that”.
Yeah, there will be a day where you guys can't contact me on the Telegram for I must rest within that app.
I want to say that I am not fine, but I think that’s not a good thing to do. Don’t judge me, because I was really fine but not emotionally right now bruh. Even though I am not stable, I could still do normal things as I did, but I just wanted to be alone.
Thanks for reading…
I didn't believe in the supernatural “Medium” until I saw it with my own.
Tuesday, 04-19-22
https://unsplash.com/photos/5d41p_9vlOk
Do you believe in supernatural and creation where it all happened because of the devil? If not, I was with you before. I don’t believe in small creatures living in the shallow form of mud, the giant that smokes cigars, the white lady, the mermaid, and even the witches. I am irrational and only believe in reality, I said, I am just a normal one that when I see things I know what and when to believe.
When I was a child I have seen a devil with my face, I also shared with you that I hate dolls. That happened when I was young, I saw a doll with the shape of a human that moved and looked at me. From that, I believed that there was really something devious spirit that comes in an idol form. They lived in dolls that look like a model of the person. Japanese also believed that one, when they said dolls had life themselves. Even the first Filipinos that believed in "ANITO" thought having a form of a humanoid made with woods gives them protection.
When I was living in my uncle's house before and after he passed away, I witnessed certain things inside the house. Terrifying and horror for sure to others but it's normal with me. They were a Spirista in their religion and at that time they had this program where every night for 9 days they would have this kind of ritual of singing Ilokano religious songs, in their group, there would always be a gifted member they called medium. I don’t know but at first, I didn't believe in the medium, they were the boundaries of living and dead, they saw and talked to the spirits but not the dead. That’s what they said.
In further explanation, I asked my uncle who was religious in different sectors. They are also not a believer in idols and the formation of saints, they don’t believe in the indolic cross and even the practice of signing it to their heads. But yeah he tells me that there was really a spirit. I am not a Godly man I always say and I was a curious nervous person. He said that after Christ was reborn, he goes to heaven but the holy spirit remains in the lands to alter his presence.
He tells me that when something happened and a sudden accident is about to change, you had been saved. The spirit saved you. I asked again if the angel are spirits? Hmmm, that will be another story for sure. For now, let's talk about the mediums.
Well, I am a serious man but really when I see the medium I know she suffered more. I saw within my eyes how normal to unnatural. They were talking to something that was made a long time ago, she summoned the draft creature that was living in the mud. Then comes that the person changes the tone of her voice to the sound of an old man, the facial expressions and everything about her was changed. They just hold her so she cants move and make herself injured.
The summoned creatures talk about everything about my uncle that day, how they get him punished because of what they did. The summons says that my uncle ruined their house. I felt something heat inside me when I heard those things from them, I knew where that place was. How the medium described the place and how they ruined it. But that’s happened a long time ago they said, what happened to my uncle wasn’t because of them.
That time after the medium performs things, something weirdly happened in their house.
Yeah, I also heard that when you really open and give time to talk and have connections with them, they will have access to the house. Those times I am the only one that felt the heavy air inside the house. My aunt who was also nursing my uncle often heard footsteps. I also heard that one after the funerals. In my time I always heard the crying voice of a baby sound creature, it was so deep and shallow. I thought I was the first one to hear but I was wrong, my father and aunt also heard that mimicking voice.
Then came a pastor who lightened me with the idea of supernaturals, yeah there were really things like mermaids, giants in trees, even witches for I saw within myself how they did. It was a pastor who also didn't believe in the sign of the cross, idols, and anything.
Do you also believe in the medium? Hmm, I think there was a difference between a medium and a person who could see ghosts. The person who they said had a third eye. Medium only relies on the holy spirit or holy ghost and the third eye could see those supernatural. Honestly, I thought it wasn’t real until I seen within my eyes. That medium is rare; they come in their body to say messages and warnings. But not the ghost, they can talk.
Well, that’s for I think for other days I will still share some bizarre things I encountered. Thanks for reading…
Some people they didn’t know but they just put mud in their faces.
https://unsplash.com/photos/t7_CN7g5aRA
Why is its leisurely for some people just to decide to change what we talked at the first place? Why does revising the plan is easy and creating new had so much validity, I don’t understand why people who once called for some deal then come the day to happened and what was delivered was different from what was originally planned, well some people don’t understand yet might be they just lived with that. But how about the people who think and expect what was first meeting but ending just disappointment because what was talked about could just be easily changed without her or her supervision.
It always comes from expectations and reality. I do not like to argue to some simple things they said, but mind that when two people agreed with a proposition where first was your usefulness and the other one had to think twice or trice to agreed, and the promised you both talked had come in an agreement where it closed and the sum of money had concluded, you need to think that it was once your priority and agenda not them, then again because of your second subject of benefit you had to change what was first proposed.
This kind of person is really what I am avoiding, I am open to talking and giving what they want even though I had a low percentage of interest and I know that I had no benefit to get within the agreement. I am the kind of person where I do like to think of an alternative way just to get what they offer and make and convert this one into something. It meant that what I am expecting is what is the first honor they give, then comes a second time where it changes. Why? I don’t know but unprofessional for sure.
Yeah, it is not just a random thought or idea, but a summon happening with me, I hate people, who think they could trick me with a, move where they don’t know they just putting the mud in their face so I knew where times again they talked the something to avoid them. It really happened to me, they think it's just so simple to moved-on or forget but never in my state. A simple record meant a lot, judge me but I won't allow a second time tricking me with the purpose of their self-benefit.
Here's the thing, people don’t understand or don’t have time to indulge that we all learn from the mistake, and one mistake is trusting people. Trust is the one that is more important than word of honor, well I don’t actually believe in word of honor especially since you two alone had talked and he or she promised. I just nod but don’t have the facts and approval that I agreed on above.
People just put mud in their own faces.
This is what I often tell myself when someone just made something within me. I am often told that I am not easy to mess with or become an enemy with. I am a devil when it comes to people that never think of what consequences they give to there selves. They put dirt on their face that only one person could just see.
Imagine that it's not always one time you had to ask them something, not only a simple moment where you need them. So from the first moment, you subject yourself to something that just bedded of you not a worthy of trust.
Well, we had that kind of friend who talks and we all know that it's all a lie or unrelated to what she or he talked about, yet who were to say things to anyone but just let it pour out on our own instead.
How do avoid this kind of dirt?
***Strict to what had been planned.***
I think this is somehow hard for other people. Yeah believed me, you had to remember especially when you were the one that offers. That considered them they agreed with your benefits so don't spoil yourself too much and don't just abruptly switch what was planned when you realized something or remember something again to uplift your own as legatees.
***Think of the second time.***
I often remember this one, especially borrowing money from someone. I always think of what if this will happen again very soon? That comes to the point where what I date I told them for me to pay will really pay sooner that day, and comes again I need fund for something very important and not so important they just openly give again because they knew it will come back soonest as possible. That’s me really, I am not rich yet I know how to pay without exclusive reasonings.
Putting dirt within our faces means that we don’t value the trust anymore, but believed me when people acted like it's just fine but at the end of the day it won't. There will be the mark that will forever leave a question to others if shall we are still worthy of the trust. Thanks for reading…
Black Friday: Is the fifteen of April's presents year.
Writing is a way where we love to just stood down all the things to do what we loved. Writing is something that could divert all things to a creative way of life. I don’t know but writing makes me more who I am, more that It could just define the real feeling and could just detach the best of my way of thinking. But like you readers, where I think I bring too much tension to my writing, where I am giving you so many things to think about, sharing the brokenness, success, and the painless alibi. Like always a person who was curious, always a person who stood for what I think proper just to define, it feels sometimes that sharing what the tension inside could irritate you more.
I am just sitting in the corner, I know that I will be late publishing the blog or skip the Black Friday for I had so much load had got. But the moonlights gives me more assurance at least. I look at the beautiful round moon that gives light to the corner of my sitting place. I just looked at it like a child that was eager to watch the beautiful coloration and dimensions. Flying to the moon that's the feeling. But I am now mature and think that I could be like Peterpan that could fly high and play to the moon. Defining the scene I had, to what I write.
Just gonna share with you what happened this Friday.
Filipinos are too much in terms of belief, especially on black Friday, they said that this day was a bit of very bad luck. Especially to business and everything, that why the public and private market in our place are closed this morning. I remember when I was so young, my mother always remind me that black Friday was so cruel and it was a day when everyone is prone to accidents. Then you cut yourself on this day, it won't heal that easy. They believed that the black spirit is more alive and strong, they believed that Christ died on a Friday, and soon Sunday he will rise again.
I went to a minimart near us to buy chicken, my uncle told me to buy some for our breakfast, he told me he wanted to friend chicken when I arrived at the store and dictated what I want. The old lady forbids me to buy, she said that on black Friday all meat is forbidden to eat. And she doesn't want to sell nor just hold the raw meat for it will signal bad luck to her. I just smiled and said that I don’t know if it was so serious about it.
She recommend the fish instead, and I called my uncle and he agreed.
Hmm, well meat is forbidden as they say this Friday so let them be, respect to the traditions I supposed.
This day, I always received a parcel where I was really surprised, I told you that my Gcash was messed up and I can't redo my account. What I did is transfer to the new apps same with Gcash and Coin.ph I registered to PayMaya Philippines and surprisingly the transaction and the measure is quite quick. My name was registered easily verified and then three days ago, I ordered my card. They had a promo for the sale of Master and Debit cards. I only brought a Master card it cost me 100 or $2 for the card and 60 pesos or $1.2 for the shipping, it's so quick that it only took three counting days and my card had arrived.
I evidently synch my MasterCard to the app, then just this afternoon I tried to withdraw some in the ATM bank and guessed what it cost only 16 pesos or $0.3 for the transaction fee.
And I was also got surprised by their rebate of load. My neighbor asked me to lend her 90 pesos and I received 4 pesos of rebates. But when I loaded my own Prepaid of 499 directing the Magic Data of 36 GB non-expiratory to all sites, I haven’t received a rebate. Might be that it's only for a regular load. That’s sad haha. (Upon checking, yeah I also received a 30 pesos rebate from 499 pesos. Sound good for business haha)
This afternoon at 3 PM they asked me if I had time shall we go to my uncle's cemetery and clean up all the debris also prepare for the 40 days celebrations of my uncle, I just told you that the Filipino is really on the traditions. After the 40th day of death, the soul now will be the judge as they said. They need to prepare the always or offering for the souls of the dead. In Filipino culture it's really something rich, and also costly for the defined haha.
Well as an obedient child, I agreed to go there. Look at the place, yeah that’s the corner now where my family will belong in times of finals. It was really planned that we shall make it soon as a family place of resting place.
Hmm, a lot of happening this day, and wised that I could share everything but unfortunately I just had some, happy holly week, and thanks for reading…
@Eunoia
