Still, A Good Decision Even Appears It Was The Worst— a redemption.

I am looking for a great redemption; who wasn't?. We are looking for the best excuse for our whole lives. The best of all the good, so we could still deliverance from fighting negativity inside, get away from the world. Decided and longing for freedom. One of these is deciding that we need to proclaim the judgment. The decision is crucial, some decision is dangerous inside the heart, and others are like a free bird to let go. But most importantly, even if it's not good in the first place, it will always be nice, for we chose it not because we just want to, we made that decision thinking of something, and that is redemption for me.

I loved the scene of my life where there was a thrilling drama, where I could extract another topic again. Another chance to leave the moment in the darkness and comes to light. It's a light, for it was for good not by myself, but it's for the sake of everyone. Thanks to Sister Lhes for enlightened me. The angel whom I don't know personally, but I am thankful I met her.

It's not easy to decide, isn't it? Especially when it needs to be blunt. My head hurt, and I began to overheat. It's a pressure thinking what if the decision we made will ruin us inside? What if the decision we touch will be wrong and the regrets come. We are all afraid of guilt, which those not easy to forget. I remember those days when my problem is just deciding what food I shall eat in the school's canteen, what should I wear to prepare myself for the going. Even determine if I will go to school or not.

Then comes the torn of being mature; it's not that deciding what to eat for now I should also loom for the price to extend the life of my budget. Comes the reality where I am not a kid anymore; I should not just laugh at things when I did incorrectly. There will be consequences to happen. When I worked as a supervisor, you must not be wrong, and even if you were wrong proved, you are not.

At first, I was confused why I needed to act like I was always right even if I did wrong? My mentor taught me the reasons, and he was right. I need to look for an excuse if I made a mistake in production, for the blame will come to me, and I shall protect myself too. The worst thing I encountered was that I needed to fire a worker whom I knew he wasn't deserved to be that way; after that, I talked to him personally and said sorry. Evaluation is low, and he had a very slow score; I can't judge him as a competent one, for I also don't want to lie in the record. Maybe that was one reason I decided to give up being a supervisor, I am still young, and I can't inject that kind of evaluation of people, asking about their lives and now firing them if they don't reach the standard. Don't judge me; there is a company policy I need to obey.

As we mature, the reality is that deciding becomes harder and harder. So some could still choose the wrong side in the face of others, for we also look for the future. We won the end over others.

Some might ask why are they selfish in the decision they make? The reality is that we are selfish and biased. Like my previous article, we all had biasedness, and now we all had selfishness; that's how the decision was made to become selfish or let others become selfish over you. Deciding for your good and others' wealth, but if I give you a chance to decide, what will you choose? Other's sake or your own sake?.

If you choose your own, still a good decision even if it seems the worst. Some will again be talked back; you were selfish and biased. People will look down on you; another hand, it was for your good and plans. Sometimes it's better to plan for yourself first and then prepare for other people again. You could fix others if you were not set yet.

And you were a martyr and choice the others over yourself, again, seem like evil, but for yourself, it was good. Some people do not care about themselves because they care more for others.

Decide now or not. As more seconds, time, and days pass, the decision is getting harder and harder for we realize a lot of lacking. The pros and cons.

It's actually expected that others will reject your decision for they will not be the benefit from it. Also, average that you will say you're being selfish in making it. But did we ask ourselves, are we not selfish? I was selfish; I thought about my future and planned for the worst things. Because in reality, at the end of the day, we will have only ourselves who cares. Some of the people we give stuff to will also have personal problems soon, and they will first solve them before helping you.

I think being selfish in decisions seems terrible, but not that way. So I chose my personal peace and focus in my last decision. A redemption happened after I concluded that it feels like I just did the right thing soon enough. Even if the result is worst, I will smile, for I know it just looks worst, but it's not.

Thanks for reading.