Control and Choice.

The desire to gain Control seems to be an innate characteristic in humans. We all have a desire, whether big or small, to have certain degree of control over something, or someone, that's why the human lust for power is insatiable. We want to gain more and more power so that we would be able to control more and more things, but do you think your love to gain control corresponds with the subservience or submissiveness of the subjects of control? That is a question we should all ask ourselves.

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One of the reasons we live in heartbreak is that we seek external solutions to our problems rather than internal solutions. When we bear in mind that complaining about the bad weather will in no way change it is the beginning of wisdom. We have no power over people's conception of us then why should we bother? The fact that we get bothered when a person we love so much doesn't like us in return goes to show that that person has gained a certain control over us. Instead of us holding the keys to our control door, we willingly hand it to someone else without even knowing, then we get puppetted without us even realising it. We get our feelings hurt, our hearts broken, and our mind doubtful. In actuality when we complain and get depressed about heartbreak, we're the ones who mostly take part in breaking our own hearts. We don't control how people treat us, but we can 100% control how we react to how they treat us. This knowledge extends to things as simple and trivial as the change in weather, on a sunny day(which you wished it wasn't), instead of complaining about how sunny the day is or how you wished it to be a bit cooler, why not controlling how you react to it by looking for a solution on your own? Something like taking a cold bath or wearing a broad hat or carrying an umbrella to shield yourself from the scorching sun? If you cannot do any of these, complaining about how hot the day is will not in the least change anything about the weather, because you don't have that power.

When we gain the almighty knowledge of knowing what is within our control and what is not, we gain a deep sense of the Self, the soul, and we can decide and differentiate for ourselves what is worth our time and energy and what is not. When we gain the clarity of things that are within and outside our control, we let things just be the way they want to be or leave them the way they are. In fact it reaches a point where we have no desire to change anything and may even come to start enjoying them just the way they are. We see them as a sort of experience which is in fact what they are. That's exactly where choice comes in. We now have the power to choose what is good for us and what is not(which we didn't have earlier due to wanting things to be the way we want them rather than just leaving them the way they are), we now have the power to control things that are within our control, while paying little attention to those outside our control. This is how we live a happy life. The clarity that comes with this knowledge can be overwhelming. You start seeing things for just what they are without feeling the need to believe anyone or to believe anything. It feels like you just developed extra eyes on your forehead. You feel more refreshed, more concerned about what is happening within you than what is happening around you, more loving, more compassionate, more considerate, wiser and happier.

It's a new year already and let's kill the mindset of expecting that the year has something in stor for us. It has absolutely nothing in store for you. It is you who should have something in store for it. This new year 2022, focus on the things you can control and let go of the things you can. Don't let the unreciprocated feelings disturb you, just let them go. You've alot of love to give for those who're willing to accept it. Stop whining and complaining about your problems, in reality no one really gives a damn. If you can't solve them now, leave then till later, if they cannot be solved later just let them go! Life is to short to be spent on complaining about things you cannot change.

Thanks for reading everyone. I wish each oand everyone of us a Happy New Year and may this blessed year of 2022 be a year of blessings, love and self - growth for us all.

Yours Layly,

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