I have always heard that pride goes before a fall but does that count in this context? Well, if you want to know the context I am talking about then I would recommend you come with me let dive into this ocean called Pride. When we say that pride goes before a fall, it implies that one must have carried his shoulder so high that he forgot to look down to see the stones on his path. Don’t mind my explanation of that but I had to define it that way just for easy understanding. Ok, pride as we all know is inbuilt in every man and no one wants another to cross that line in their life. Let me clarify that the word man in this article covers both the male and female gender. Let us continue with the article and I believe you are following. I have asked myself severally what and how can ones pride or ego be bruised? There is one clear thing we must understand that one’s ego or pride is that which keeps in check all the time. Let me look at the dictionary meaning of these two words; Pride and Ego.
Dictionary Speaks
There are lots of dictionary definitions about Pride but I will choose two to buttress my point.
1. Pride: it is defined as a feeling of self-respect and personal worth.
2. The trait of being spurred on by a dislike of falling below your standard.
Let us look at the definition of the word Ego.
Ego is defined as an inflated feeling of pride in your superiority over others.
Looking at these two definitions, you will understand that pride is a sort of what gives a man his worth or respect in the eyes of others, while ego is a form of the fuel that gives fire to a man’s pride. Now, the question to ask is; how can a man’s pride or ego be bruised? There are many ways a man’s pride can be bruised in this life. Let me outline those ways.
· A man’s pride can be bruised by lack of money.
· Through inferiority complex.
· Failure in Academic pursuit and also in life general.
· A man’s pride can be greatly bruised by their spouse.
There are others points or ways by which a man’s pride can be bruised but I chose to stop with these few points. If you noticed, I had to bold the last point where I talked about a man’s pride being bruised by their spouse. This is because this article was inspired by an event I witnessed last night while I was coming back from where I went to hang out with some friends. Lol… I know that some of you will say that I started making out time to hang out with friends after my ordeal on Sunday but that won’t be far from the truth. Who wouldn’t do the same after all, life is too short. Sorry for my digression, please let us get back into the topic of the day.
As I said, this article was inspired by an event I witnessed and I must tell you, this is not something one should pray for in their marriage because I believe it is not wonderful to witness. However you may see this article, please try to understand that the tone of this article is not in any way feministic rather we should all reflect on it in a way to stop it from happening in our relationships. I asked a question on how a man’s pride can be bruised and I will beg you to permit me to answer it by narrating the ugly incident I witnessed last night.
How can a man’s pride be bruised?
In one of the points I outlined above, I said that a man’s pride can be bruised by their spouse, do you agree? Well, before you either agree or not, allow me to narrate what I witnessed last night.
It was just like every other night and I felt like walking home instead of using the tricycle mind you, it is not because of the near-death experience I had with the tricycle on Sunday, it was just a means to straighten my legs or exercise. As I was walking, I got close to where a tricycle parked by the side of the road and I noticed that a few people were just looking inside the tricycle as if something was happening. As it is a normal thing to do curiosity took over. I approached closer to the tricycle but with a high level of alertness in case of any eventuality. As I got closer, I began to hear voices and I was able to distinguish between the two voices to be that of a man and a woman and as I peeped into the tricycle, I saw a lady in tears on her kneel, holding the hand of the man and as I tried to make something out of the whole situation, I heard the man say; “stop pleading, it’s over”.
When I heard this I became more curious and in my curiosity, I listened carefully to what the lady was saying because she was speaking amidst teary voice and I managed to hear her say “it was not intentional and I did not collect the money”. At that point, I was still not sure of what was going on but fortunately for me, the man said but in a heartbroken voice “why did you go to ask him for money? Each time I leave the house in the morning I give you enough money to take care of yourself and you have never told me that the money has never been enough, why then did you have to go and start begging for money from another man? You could have told me that you needed more money”. It was at this point that it became very clear to me that this was a case of a man’s pride being bruised by the spouse. Don’t ask me what I did because I just told the tricycle driver who has been trying so hard to pacify the man but all to no avail to take them home because it was obvious they have not gotten to their destination.
As soon as I told the driver to move, he drove off and the reason why I did that was that I understood that they were a young couple and for the fact that they are having issues does not mean that the whole world will now gather around to watch them embarrass themselves. I also know that when they get home which I believe will certainly happen, they will reconcile on their matrimonial bed as it is with newly wedded couples.
The summary of the event
Looking at the event that I just narrated, you will see that the man’s pride was greatly bruised by the wife. This is a case of a man who takes pride in providing for the wife and who would not take it lightly to hear that the wife seeks financial help from another person especially another man. I know that you have a lot to say in this case that is why I brought it for us to look at because I believe that we should learn from other people’s mistakes. Now, let me ask if you are the man in this case, what would you do? And as a woman, is it good to go seek financial help from another man without the consent of your husband?
I believe that the man was angry because the wife did not inform him before and after seeking financial help. After all, the man said that he found out from his friends who got the wind of what the wife did. Now, the last question which I would want every one of us to try and answer is; if you are the man’s friend, would you tell him what you heard or noticed about the wife when you know that it might cost him his marriage?
I will be expecting to have your response in the comment section and I believe by the end of the day we would have learnt one or two things from this event.
My eyes are ready to read your responses…
The woman was actually so wrong to have engaged in such. That's covetousness and fornication. You have a man who gives you whatever you ask for, so what else do you need? The man was wrong having the conversation with her before they got home, he should have waited for them to get home before washing his dirty linen. They should settle it amicably when they get home. And to your question, if I were the man's friend I wouldn't dare tell him anything. Relationship matters are so sensitive. And I wouldn't want to be the one to destroy their home which us shaky already. And finally, when they settle, they would place all blames on the person trying to create a gap between them.