October 5, 2021
It's just a matter of fact that some people can't be part of your future. - Samuel Zulu
Sometimes we may have no choice but to ghost someone. As the famous line quote "It is better to leave unspoken". But other times, we do it to avoid uncomfortable situations. But just to be fair here, nothing will remain unspoken forever because eventually, things will happen and find it's way just for you to spill out the reasons why you left them without a word.
Here's a list of TYSSIG that stands for "Things You Should've Said Instead of Ghosting" (Someone)
"It was fun and I loved getting to know you but, I don't feel a connection. I really appreciate your time but I'm also really sorry for wasting it."
If you don't like him/her at all after talking to them for weeks, spending time with them, just tell them right away and don't play with their feelings so they can move on with their lives and stop hoping for false hope. I suggest just say it in polite manner.
"This isn't working for me anymore. I hope you understand how I feel. "
Well this might sound rude and probably some excuses you made just to get out of a toxic relationship. I just hope that you use this for that reason and not because you found someone else, that is totally unacceptable for any reason. You can find someone else later, than already knowing who you will going to replace your previous partner into, that's may not be a cheat but that's how traitor move.
"Hey, I just wanted to let you know that I have a lot of things going on in my life and I am not able to prioritize our friendships/relationship"
If there are more important things that you have to prioritize, then tell them right away. Because, literally ANYTHING is better than ghosting, just for closure. You don't have to be friends with them again if they can't understand you and respect your decisions with your life. They don't deserve you.
" I think that my boundaries aren't respected in this relationship an I don't want to continue seeing you"
This is the easiest and direct way. You don't have to be nice all the time to people if they disrespects you. Toxic people would never understands you. But not everyone is toxic so don't be too rude and tell them the truth of how you are feeling. Don't play with their feelings if you don't feel them anymore.
"I don't want any contact with you because ... (state your reasons and end it with) Please respect my decisions."
This might work. But then again we can't expect people to respect our decision especially for those toxic people. Some people just ghost so they can come back when they don’t any options left. Don't be that jerk, and let some people move on with their life.
Closing Thought
This might only work with healthy people and knows how to respect your opinion and boundaries with each other. There are people out there that don't want to understand you but at least you tell them the truth in a kind manner, please. Don't expect people to say nice things and be understandable toward you after you tell them these, if they are one of those who can't understands and respect you, they are the one who just couldn't accept the fact of getting rejected. Some people are so narcissist that they don't have the time to respect other people even if you already told them that they make you uncomfortable.
Healthy people, well of course, it's very rare for this things to happen because no one would ever leave a healthy person because they give you a peace of mind. If ghosting might happen to these people, it could be the other way around and their partner were the toxic one's.
Date: October 5, 2021
Author: Corpsekkuno
Title: Ghosting
Article No.: 62
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Author’s Note
Saying all this might be truly painful but y'know it's better to express how you truly feel and make them understand rather than just leave them without a word and make them assume that you will come back after ghosting them.
Thank you so much for taking your time to read this; I appreciate your effort and I hope you enjoy.
If you're interested in reading more, here's a list of suggestions:
May isang himala na magaganap kapag may ghoster na nagsabi nito. Hahaha. But well yes, we need to respect each other's decisions even if it is hurting us. We need to accept the fact that people have their own minds and we can't control them in every way that we want.