Don't Get Swayed By Anxiety.
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I have this habit sometimes that it even becomes too often now that whenever I get bored from everything I do either online or in real life, I just randomly call my family and friends to have a check on them. My regular victim is my Mother but when I have nothing important to tell her, I switch to other people like my cousins whom I didn't see for years. I just chitchat with them on whatever topic that we can think of and have fun, just so we can keep ourselves updated and also to know if one of us needs some help.
The same thing with my friends. I sometimes call them randomly without even asking for their permission if I can call whenever I saw them online on Messenger. Luckily, they don't get mad at me. They knew me pretty well —of how crazy and caring I am at the same time. But of course, I say sorry if I called that they were busy. They will just get back to me later and continue where we left off.
I often enjoyed having deep talks with them and hearing their stories to tell me even though some of them were just gossip and hearsays. As the caring person that I am, though it's not that obvious, I'm often glad to hear them share their worries and problems with me. I feel relieved also if I can help them even if it was only simple advice and glad also that they chose to vent it out on me. At least, I can help them by making them feel better and that they have someone who is always there that they can freely talk to without worrying that their secrets are going to leak out to the public. Well, keeping secrets for life is one of my specialty skills aside from being a good listener. Your secrets are safe with me.
One of these friends that I often check on is my best friend since we were in high school. We were just batchmates not classmates but I'm closer to him and I like hanging out with him than my classmates. My classmates were like elites; I feel like I was a misfit every time I was with them. On the other hand, if I'm with my best friend, I can freely be who I am without worrying that I will be judged and hear some criticisms. Since then, we treat each other like siblings even now. Among my friends in high school, he is one of these three friends that is left in my circle that never snobs me after graduation and we are still having communication even now.
I check up on him just this noon. I sent him a message saying, "Bwoii, let's chat. I'm bored. 😂"
Then he was like, "What's up, Marites?"
I don't reply anymore but directly make a call and he answered after a ring.
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Then without further ado, he shares what are his worries on his mind. He told me that he is worried that he might fail in his last year in college. He said that after their thesis defense, he doesn't have any energy to do his schoolwork anymore. His group hasn't done well in their defense and is worried that it might be a failure. Having this anxiety, he slowly lost interest in his other schoolwork and even in his hobbies like skateboarding and biking.
Me being a good friend told him to go on and hold on a little more. I told him not to waste this opportunity anymore since this is already his last year in college. It's only a waste of time and money if he would repeat a year in college just because of a failed subject. Only 2 months to go and he will graduate, so why not keep pushing until the end, right?
His mood shifts and becomes livelier after that. He then began chuckling and blabbing a lot of things more about it. I just let him say whatever he wants to release all that stress that he has. It's not easy having all stress and anxiety, I know that and I have been through that. First, you'll just feel worried, then you overthink, then you got over nervous, then got afraid to try new things so you'll just stay in your room, then you lose interest in everything, then procrastination kicks in, then you'll feel lonely or sad until you get succumb to depression. Once you get drowned, it's hard to kick off and swim back to the surface.
I also told him that and suggested that he should just keep himself busy, so he could divert his attention into other things and forget his worries from time to time. He listened and told me that he will try to hang out with his friends and his girlfriend for some time. Then, I just told him to talk to me again whenever he felt like that again as we bid goodbyes since we have to talk for more than two hours already and he had to attend his class.
Have you checked your friends, too?
Comforting words are already a big help for them. Even if we can't help them with our physical service, let's just try our best to cheer them up.
Thanks for reading!
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Anxiety is such a productive killer. I used to have it but I realized we can control but still depends on the externally pressures like you know toxic environment and more.