To whom it may concern,
Hello! I have written this message in a form of a formal letter because I don’t know how to say it in person. I know that in life, committing mistakes is not an option because we are human. As a man who didn’t know how to say an apology properly, I don’t think that I can deliver and portray my sincerity by just saying “I’m so sorry!” in person. So, here I am, writing this letter to all of the people in my life whether former or current acquaintances, to my family, friends, past relationships I’ve been with, to my classmates, teachers, and even those people that I don’t know.
To my mom, I know I was a bit naughty when I was a child. I know we had fights sometimes. I even scolded you once. I often defy your rules and always act deliberately against your will but I also know that despite so many unwanted things I’ve done, in the end, you're still proud of me. I’m sorry for all the things I’ve done wrong, and I want you to know that for me, you are the best mother that anyone could ever dream of. I may not be the kind of person who can express his feelings well especially in front of other people, I may not be told you this even once, but I want you to know that I love you and I will always will.
To my father, we are so alike, I only heard you once saying that you love us but for me, that’s even more than enough. Yes, I’m not that open to you, we barely talk or make some bonding with each other. I never showed you that I love you but that doesn’t change the fact of how much I care about you and mom. I may not be a showy person like my siblings, I may not tell you how much I hurt, how much I suffer nor how much I'm happy but it doesn’t mean I didn't love you. Thank you for everything, and I’m sorry if I can’t tell you this in person. You’re the best dad for me, and if I will be granted a second chance to live again, I will still choose you to be my father. I wish you a good and strong healthy body as well as my mom. See you soon.
To my elder brother, we both know what happened in the past. Yes, I got mad at you, and to be honest what you have done on that day left a mark on my head, heart, and soul, It will never be erased that’s why it took me five years to finally free myself from that nightmare, but I never said I didn’t forgive you. However, that act of yours has changed me a lot, that’s why you can never feel that I am with all of you guys even if we live together. My heart will never be that soft again. Who am I today is the fruit of what I was yesterday. Still, I want to apologize for it took me so long to forgive you. I know that I can no longer show my true emotions and I can no longer lower my guard but it doesn’t mean that you’re not important to me, and for that reason, I’m deeply sorry! I hope that you and the rest of our siblings understand that I’m not the same person as I was before.
To my elder sisters, I know that the way I talk to you guys wasn’t appropriate. It seems like you’re already aware that I’m trying my best to bond with you but I can’t make it fully. I’m always bossy, I may be asking or answered your concern disrespectfully but it doesn’t mean that I don’t consider you as my elders. I'm sorry because I know that I often piss you off. I’m sorry because I always choose not to commit myself to you guys.
To Ynah, you may not be reading this, but I still want to apologize. I know how much I’ve hurt you in the past. The way I treated you as if you’re nothing to me. The way I disregard your presence in front of my friends despite the truth that they know how we are related to each other. I’m sorry that I made you cry. The truth is, I loved you and it hurts me every time you complain that It seems like you’re in a dead space when we are together. It hurts because I wanted to show how I’m deeply in love with you but I don’t know how? I am sorry that I was too selfish especially at that moment on my birthday. I’m sorry that I rejected your gift. I didn’t know that you crash your savings and you put so much effort, that you even continued to finish that present during the class. I’m a total fool to let you go but I’m happy for you now, now that I know you find someone that really loves you. I’m sorry for everything.
And lastly, to myself, I’m sorry that I put you in a vast emptiness and the middle of nowhere. Soon when the time comes and when God grants me one more chance, I want to put myself in a colorful and lively life. Once again this is me the author saying goodbye. Thank you!
Yours’s truly
Argent
It's okay to make mistakes. As long as you're able to learn something from it