Living a Life of Loving-Kindness

We all tend to be so hard on ourselves. We hate when we slip and we end up slipping into a tirade of negative self-talk for days.

There are many ways that we can avoid such situations in our lives. Many times the physical situations are out of our control. Things happen! However, we can take steps to being as self-compassionate as possible so that what was a slip won't turn into an inner war and rage.

Here are a few steps to live a life of loving kindness.

1. Be careful with the way you express anger

We are all so hard on ourselves. We expect perfection and never to fail. But this is so unrealistic. However, when you expect perfection, you get angry with yourself if you are not perfect.

To be at your best, it is of utmost importance that you cultivate compassion towards yourself. This can soften your heart and allow the odd slip up.

2. Don't blame anybody

If we are angry, we usually blame someone else for our misfortunes or slip ups. Blame is something that is completely unnecessary. Instead of blaming, look at anger impartially. Act instead from your highest intentions. They are usually compassionate. Become mindful instead of blaming.

3. Try to cultivate gratefulness

Try and cultivate gratefulness with everything and everyone in your life. Our habitual tendency is to look past all the good things other have done for us and to instead focus on and replay every real and imagined slight. Finding time in your life to actively cultivate gratefulness is an important part of the practise of loving-kindness.

Gratefulness softens your heart and helps reduce your anger. Also, gratefulness seeds the soil to allow loving-kindness to grow naturally into joy and peace.

4. Choose Your Friends Wisely

Try not to choose to spend time with angry people. This can be very damaging to our own state of mind and it can serve to reinforce our own habit of anger. If instead you can help such people through your practise of loving-kindness, you should help them. Otherwise, when possible and appropriate, it is often best not to associate with them.

When people habitually indulge in anger, they destroy their opportunity to live in the peace and harmony. You need these two things to cultivate self-compassion for yourself and others.

5. Look at yourself honestly

Honest and mindful introspection is essential for truly integrating a life of loving-kindness. You must be willing to look at yourself, at your own motivations-especially when you experience anger and greed.

Make sure you ask yourself if you are acting selfishly. We all have a tendency to have a deep and unexamined belief that things should go the way we want them to and we get angry when they don't. But most times, these feelings are selfish where we only take our own views and issues to heart.

By taking these steps, you will be striving to life a life of loving kindness. What a blessing such a life is!