"My Academic Breakdown During Online Class"

Now, that the world bring us negativity, we always find ways to continue our Educational System in our country. As a student, we have different knowledge, strategies, skills, obligations, mindset and so on. Because, we are unique individuals. This article is all about my academic breakdown during online classes.

Before, I feel so excited to learn inside our house. I will not go to school anymore and we can save money on the tricycle fare, since we will only study at home.

I told to myself that I can do it, and I will really do it for my dreams in life. As a youth, who came from a poor family. I strive hard to lift up my family out of being poorness, especially to help my parents to give us proper Education, because we are Seven siblings.

Our life became even more difficult when we had experienced Covid-19 Pandemic. There were lockdowns, ECQ, GCQ and so on. The most worst at that time are to find work, foods and money to sustain our daily living. It's really tearful that time. Life is so hard and we need to find ways to survive in this crisis.

As the class approaching, the headaches and problems increased because we didn't have wifi and we didn't have enough supplies of gadgets for our online classes. We choose the online class because we could better understand and cope up easily with the teacher's teaching process. If it is modular, we will be the only one to pay attention or self-study to everything written in the whole module. And as what I said before, not all students are quit smart and can cope up easily in just one read.

So, why I undergo Academic Breakdown during online classes?

First, is the internet connection. We have unstable connection since we only used piso wifi before. Not, until my parents bought us Globe Prepaid Wifi. But, still the connection is poor. After the first sem, my parents find ways to borrow money to her friends in order to connect us in the tower. That's why we have stable wifi today because we use PLDT. But, sometimes still the signal is unstable.

Second, is being pressured to the deadlines of the paperworks, videos, performance tasks and so on. 2 weeks is not enough to comply all the requirements that the teachers gave to us. I'm so tired enough in doing heavy tasks. Think about it, everyday in each subject has 5 paperworks and two videos to do. And they give us only 2 weeks to comply all of that. Each day, tasks are becoming heavy. Super tearful that time.

Also, research is one subject that made me depressed that time because, my teammates have no contribution to our paper. I just help everyone to do all in our paper, including defense, I am the only one who finished our research until the end. All, that I hold is hope. Hope, to finish this all. One time, I actually cried at them, even it's so embarrassing. I can't really contain my resentments towards them anymore. Since, we're all just beginners and we don't know each other yet because of the new section. I'm just crying because I'm trying to fight even though I'm really tired physically and mentally. And, I undergo anxiety and sickness.

Third, my classmates atittudes. I don't have friends in my new section. They are so feeler and pabibo. I don't like their attitudes and how they treat our teachers. They don't have manners literally. That's why, I always do alone without anyone talking or asking what to do in the activity if I don't usually get it. I do it alone and I understand it critically. I don't want to owe something in my classmates.

Fourth, lack of sleeps due to heavy requirements. I usually sleep around 3am in the morning to finish 3 tasks.. And get up around 6am to prepare for my class. Sometimes, I faced in the camera without fixing myself. I always eat my meals pass on its right time due to conflict class sechedules and meetings.

One time, I usually said to myself that... "I want to give up!! , I'm so tired enough!! Kaya ko pa bah? ..O kinakaya ko lang?

Online class is so hard, even modular. Sometimes, teachers did not considers our sides that their given tasks to us are so heavy. They keep on saying that "Why? Others can do it. Why you can't?" ...Are they insane!!! Lol.. Not all students are the same, not all student had the capabilities to do the tasks and not all student are so smart!!!!! What kind of mindset is that!

Are we students, are the only one that will gonna adjust in this new learning Platform? How come they don't want to consider our point? !!

Studying at the University is so hard. But, what else can we do? Striving hard even sometimes we want to give up, even we are so tired enough mentally, emotionally and physically. Also, the school tuition is so heavy to paid off. Haysstt...

But, even I undergo academic breakdown that time. I learned that, even in the hardest time of my life. My parents and my family are always there to help me, lift me up, my crying shoulder and God who will help us to overcome our problems in life.

God will always elighten our mind and inner self and in our darkness times. Because, with God nothing is impossible.

My journey in this new platform is not that easy. Every step of the way I always face trials and criticization from other people, but it doesn't stop me to pursue my dreams, rather it made me stronger. And I'm proud to say that I made this far.

And now, I am already a grade 12 student in this S.Y: 2021-2022 . More way to go. Laban lang para sa pangarap sa buhay. And, I realized that, as long that we push or pressure our selves to something that we know we can't really do it... We can't learn something because we need to follow our progress . It's the learning that count.

Thank you for reading this. I hope you like it and I hope, I construct it meaningfully and properly. God Bless! Kudos to all Students!!

@whitney123