That single parent...

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Avatar for wakeupkitty
3 years ago


Are single parents such bad parents? Are children raised by a single parent doomed? Do they grow up as a criminal, a burden to society? Do they really have a lower IQ and EQ than children with two parents?

If we believe what they (the society) say this seems to be true. On what exactly is this opinion based? If we search deeper the only answer is nothing.
The child of a single parent is not stupid. There's not one single scientist which can prove the theory that children of a single parent have a lower IQ, cannot learn, have any skills, and grow up for no good.
The only reason why so many believe this is the case is that religious societies claim a child is better off with two parents, two parents of a different gender. It doesn't matter if these parents invest time in their children if they love them or at least like them. It doesn't matter if those parents fight and create an unhealthy and dangerous environment or if they (sexually) abuse and molest their children. Two is better than one at least that is what "they" say. They, the churches, mosques, the teachers, some families, and for some reason we believe them. We believe what "they" preach although deep down we know it's a big lie.

Fighting parents, adults who humility, neglect each other is not a great example for children. As a child, you do not feel happy if your parents don't like you if they scare you.


A fact is many children did not have a great childhood.

These children are not raised by single parents only.

If you ask those who had a great childhood they say they had a great mom, a caring one, or... a great father. Rarely is said "My parents made a great team and that is why they became great parents" or "my parents are great because I have a father and mother". Apparently, a father and mother are not that important but a caring person is.


Children love their parents (s).
They love and like what is familiar to them and what they depend on. This is normal.
Some children say they even love their parents although they know they are not the greatest in the world. Children forgive mistakes. Most children are loyal even if those parents suck but this doesn't mean they are blind for their mistakes and don't see how other parents take care of their children.



Single parent.
There are way more single parents in this world as most of us are aware of. Although we know they exist and their number increases daily they are treated as the underdog especially if it comes to the single mother.
A single mom is pathetic, a single dad a hero.
A single mom is for sure a whore and dumped, a single father is someone to feel pity for because he has such a hard time and deserves so much better.
The single mother should always stay home, take care, focus on the child(ren) but a single dad needs a break, has to go out because his life is so hard.
Single moms are labeled as low educated, anti-social, too stupid to live while the single dad is intelligent, social, and deserves a way better life.
The list of what people say about single parents is long but if it comes to it it's based on nothing else as single cases. Cases that confirm what "everyone already knows", knows thanks to the myths spread.



What I know about single parents is they are though.

No matter what others say they do take the responsibility of raising children and work hard. They try their best although societies look down on them. Those same societies who are against abortion and do not care about the single mother but abandon her.

No matter if the single parent is tired, sick, he/she goes on. Many do not have family or friends who give them a hand. Help cooking, babysitting, explain homework, or teach how to bicycle. A single parent deals with everything alone and in most cases not out of own free will. They once hoped to do the job together, hoped to build a happy family.

Life seldom is what we hope for, brings disappointments and pain, the single parent knows all about it but is a fighter. They keep hoping for the best and teach their children what they can while building a happy family on their own.

Does the single-parent family differ from one with two parents?
In many families, it's still one parent's job to raise children. In most cases, it's the woman who does.
What you won't find in a single-parent family is discussions, fights, abuse, and violation between two parents and... in a single-parent family, a child can not learn from one parent to disrespect the other. Boundaries set are clear.
The only difference between families is because people are not the same and are caused by the grade of wealth. A poor child will have fewer opportunities but that doesn't mean it can not grow into a great personality with more skills than the spoiled child of a VIP.

I am a single parent. I never chose to be one or thought I would be one but I grew into it. Not one of my children ended up on the street, ever smoked or used drugs. They finished school, their education, never skipped a day. All of them are intelligent, have self-esteem, and are personalities. They work hard to build a life of their own which is something to be proud of.
My life as a single mom isn't always easy but the great thing about children is they accept you the way you are. I do not need to please or serve them and the best of all I do not need to please and argue with a partner. I worked fulltime to provide in their needs, taught them how to take care of themselves, to depend on themselves, their own knowledge, skills, intuition, and power. I am better off as a single parent. It's easier and I am glad and grateful to be alone.

#kittywu #single #life #parent


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Avatar for wakeupkitty
3 years ago

Comments

Being a single parent can be challenging, it can also be rewarding . Being a single parent doesn't mean u are alone , you may have family members, friends, neighbors. Parenting is hard work.. we should respect all our parents...

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3 years ago

We should indeed. They take the job on their shoulders even without family and friends. In my country most do it alone, without help it's not a habit to help.

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3 years ago

I Salute you for being a tough mom, society are always exaggerating things, accepting things that are ideal and disapprove what's not. Not all who grew up on a broken family has no future or grew up with so much negativity. It depends on the situations, I'm a fatherless child never had a chance even just a glimpse of my father shadows to see but I grew up much more sensible than those with complete family. I just wanna thank you for taking so much care with your children, because it's always better without a father than without a mother.

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3 years ago

My mom is a single parent. I never had a father with me.

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User's avatar Jim
3 years ago

My children only have me and no father either. It doesn't make them feel miserable. Does it matter to you?

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3 years ago