Toxic Environment

It is really hard to bring back the motivation that you had when you start to build yourself for the better. There are a lot of obstacles you will really go into and fight everything that goes along the way.

Starting 2021 was really a great thing for me. I had a lot of ups and downs but I will admit that the ups are the best thing that happened to me. I thought that it will go as the days pass by but I was wrong. It's the first in my life that I have to live in an environment where people only care about themselves.

I had the idea that I will pursue a passion I've always wanted to do and also a career that is somehow new to me but I am optimistic about it. I already had a lineup of classes I have been attending to and it went great. I started to learn things and improve the knowledge that I had to be able to become a better me.

But it is not always rainbows and ponies.

I live in an area where people think they are superior to me just because they are "older" than me. I know that as you grow old, you understand more things about life. Apparently, that's not the case for most people here. As long as it benefits them, they don't care about everybody else. Well, sometimes, they actually care but deep inside, I know that they are only doing that to show off and not actually help the ones in need.

Living in a toxic environment will be always challenging. You will have people who would rather take than give. I appreciate people who actually do care and think ahead in every situation but you also understand situations and how they happened. You cannot judge a situation based on how you think it is. This is why I don't talk at most times because I need to know every detail about it.

Your thought isn't always the right one.

One thing that I also noticed is that some people are too proud of themselves. I know that there are times in life where you should be proud of but bragging about it as if it makes you far ahead of everyone is not a healthy thing. Especially when you don't actually achieve anything in life, you can't talk above people. Education is what everybody needs and unfortunately, it was given to people who don't deserve it.

I think people underestimate the fact that I'm an introverted person. Part of being that person who doesn't talk too much is that I listen too much. I analyze every person based on how they talk and treat everybody at the table. If you're the kind of person who makes yourself a good person by making someone look bad, then you're not a good person as you think you are. Unless the person does the same to you, you might as well show how unbothered you are about it.

Lastly, I think going out of your comfort zone isn't always about what you do, it's also about where you live to do what you need to do.