Am I part of their group?

Every person has a reliable "friend" they can turn to for support, someone they can confide in when they are having a difficulty, someone they can hang out with when they are alone, and someone they can trust to give them sound counsel.

I'm the kind of guy who is easy to get along with, approachable, and friendly, and if you ever come to me, you won't ever be written off. Since I am not the snobbish or easily angered type of person, I always make friends quickly when I transfer to a new school.

Having a friend is similar to having someone you can rely on; they are the people you can think of as the most precious gems to you. Having friends at high school or college adds fun and color to your journey because you can enjoy high school or college life more at this point. Friends that you treat like brothers/sisters and who you always agree with.

However, when I actually thought about it, I became perplexed and asked, "Do I really belong in their group of friends?" I'm not sure how I got to this point, but perhaps it was because of what they had shown me that had influenced my thoughts.

So here's a little story time..

In high school, I had a group of friends that I would categorize as the best kind of friends; because we shared practically the same interests, we got along well in many aspects of life and our friendship grew even closer.

My friends couldn't find the course they wanted here, and I was the only one left, so we ended up attending different colleges this year. And as I've already mentioned, making friends comes naturally to me. I even managed join this particular group of friends, to which I now feel a sense of belonging.

Three people make up this friendship circle, and I know they have a close link because they have all attended the same senior high school and high school classes together. The two of them are people I already know because we were classmates in elementary school and were close then, so I believe that our friendship hasn't changed.

I'm in my 4th year of college now and it means I've been with them for four years and consider them to be my friends. But why do I still feel like I don't fit in their group, and why do they seem to treat me differently than our other friends? Although I have grown to be a good friend and I am aware that this feeling is really juvenile, I can't help but feel sad about it.

These are the reasons, in my opinion, for why I don't feel like they treat me like I belong in their circle of friends.

1. I am the last to be told

For instance, if they have something to do or a plan to do, I am the last person they will talk to or tell me about their plan, and since they already have one, I will just go along with it.

2. They act unconcerned

When there is an event at school or if I don't have transportation, I merely notice from them that even if they chat or text with me, "where am I?" or "what happened to me and I'm not there yet?" I have not received any messages from them expressing concern for me. Despite the fact that I tell them that my head hurts, they either don't respond or don't care.

3. Ignored Message

When I have a question for them or I have an important message for them, they don't immediately answer or reply to my message. I know that they have seen my message because the check on the messenger is grayed out, indicating that they have read my message on their chat heads and decided to ignore it. This is the point at which I am most hurt.

I'm not sure why I constantly feel wounded whenever they do this to me, even though I know that it's not a true test of friendship and that they still regard me as a friend. Even though I'm accustomed to these kinds of emotions and circumstances, I still want to feel like I belong to their group.

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However, despite this, I am still grateful to them because, of course, we shared many great moments together as friends and somehow, they helped to make my college year happy. Perhaps this is how they actually treat me, but they still regard me as a friend.

Thank you for dropping by!

Lead image is made from Canva.

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