There is a distinction between maturity and emotional maturity. You can be over six feet tall and have a receding hairline and still be emotionally immature. So, what exactly does emotional maturity entail?

When a person is emotionally mature, they can control their emotions in almost any situation. They have empathy for others and are often able to deescalate a conflict. They are the person you go to if something goes wrong. When you need to talk about a difficult issue. So, how to be like them so that you will no longer have to depend on them?

Here are the ways to become more emotionally mature to help you gain control of your emotions.

Make a diary

Do you have negative thoughts? Are you constantly putting yourself down? Do you always point out your flaws when you look in the mirror or finish a project?

It is critical for our mental health that we strive for positive thoughts rather than negative ones. While we may believe, "Oh, it's only one bad thought. It's not a big deal." These negative comments we make to ourselves quickly add up. You're left with a harsh thinking pattern that will frequently take the lead in what you think. These thought processes are typically automatic and can develop into habits. We don't want to think of ourselves or others negatively, but negativity can infiltrate our minds.

Cognitive reconstructuring is a good way to think positively. This can be accomplished by keeping a diary. Every day, write down how you feel. What were some of the thoughts that ran through your head? What were you worried about? Was it worthwhile? What are some alternative perspectives on the situation? Our concerns may be valid, but when we open our diaries and see the same thoughts taking up our time day after day, we may realize that it weren't worth worrying about. When we recognize this, we can begin to move forward and devise practical solutions for dealing with stress and negative thoughts. We can always counteract negative thoughts by writing a positive one next to them.

Look for a role model

If you're struggling with how quickly you react negatively in stressful situations, use someone you admire as a model. What would they do if someone you respect acted emotionally maturely and positively? It's great to use them as a role model in difficult situations, such as Mother Teresa. What do we mean by a role model? It's important to you, of course, that you don't lose sight of who you are. You don't want to become your role model and lose yourself in the process.

You just want to know how they deal with situations so well. Perhaps they have a strong work ethic that you admire and want to emulate. What are their strategies for dealing with negative feedback? Smoothly and calmly? It's worth a shot. So, the next time you're in a difficult situation, ask yourself, "What would Mother Teresa do?"

Be open minded

Emotionally mature people recognize that they do not have all of the answers. That is why we should broaden our horizons and consider perspectives other than our own. We may have strong feelings about certain issues, but simply listening to opposing viewpoints doesn't hurt. Instead, we should consider how we can persuade them that they are incorrect. It's best not to rush to judgment about someone or something. If we can learn to be open-minded about even the smallest of things. We allow ourselves the opportunity to try something new. We can enjoy different films and literature that we may not have thought suited our tastes. Try a new recipe and, most importantly, listen to what others have to say.

Listening to another point of view may teach us something or make us realize we were mistaken. We can still form our own opinions at the end, but only after we've listened with an open mind until the other people's beliefs become arguments. Even if we don't agree, we may gain a better understanding of them, which can be very powerful. Mother Teresa, our role model, once said, "If you judge people, you have no time to love them."

Accept reality

Do you frequently criticize yourself because of your circumstances and flaws? Remember when you had negative thoughts? Do they spend a lot of time dwelling on your reality rather than dwelling on, or even suppressing, your flaws?

Accept and welcome them. It's your life. Instead of ignoring your problems, find a way to live with them. If you have the ability to change it, do so. If you can't accept who you are, where you are, and work toward what makes you happy. Accepting this will provide you with not only clarity but also peace as you move forward. Remember Mother Teresa's Peace advice, "Peace begins with a smile."

Live in the present

Dwelling on the past can bring on feelings of sadness and regret. Don't even get me started on how stressful it is to think about the future. So, while we can learn from our past and plan for the future, we must also learn to live in the present. We are less likely to react negatively or fall into old habits if we are in the present and make conscious decisions. Being in the present moment is extremely powerful. It is the only time we have to act, choose, experience, and enjoy ourselves. We can't change the past and we can't travel to the future if we allow ourselves to. So why waste our valuable time dwelling on them? Life is taking place right now. And, as Mother Teresa would say, "Yesterday has passed us by. Tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. Today is the only day we have."

Pause and be patient

Have you ever gotten into a heated argument and said something you later regretted?

This is most likely due to the fact that we act on impulse, when we are upset. We can begin to say what we truly mean if we take a moment to pause and reflect. Simply expressing how we feel and why can change a situation by making not only the other person understand you, but also yourself. Pause in a stressful or confusing situation to give yourself the opportunity to consciously choose how you want to respond. It will only get you closer to emotional maturity.

Identify your emotions

How can we understand our emotions if we don't know what we're feeling? It may seem silly to identify your emotions, but before you get into a heated argument or burst into tears, do you know what brought you there?

Perhaps a simple annoyance with someone's remark got deep into your thoughts, and you carried that resentment with you for the rest of the day. If you first recognize what you're feeling, you can begin to understand why and find a solution for yourself. Make a diary like I told you a while ago, for every time you're angry or irritated, and for every time you're sad or empty, and then ask yourself why you felt that way. Being aware of your emotions and understanding why you feel them can help you manage them. So, if you notice yourself becoming irritated at your brother for eating the last donut or your own donut, take a deep breath and recognize that you're simply irritated at a donut before saying something you'll regret. For the rest of the day, that irritation could turn into anger.

If you haven't already identified why you were angry in the first place, now is the time to recognize and acknowledge your anger. Remind yourself that your emotions are valid, but that you do not have to act on them.

Take responsibility

Have you ever denied something just to avoid admitting you were wrong?

Reality can be difficult to face at times, but it is more mature to accept responsibility for our actions rather than brushing them aside. We can never learn and grow from our mistakes if we simply ignore that we were wrong during an argument or do not take action on things that are our responsibilities. Being aware, holding yourself accountable, admitting mistakes, and learning from them all demonstrate emotional maturity. Not only that, but the next time you're in the same situation, you won't repeat the same error.

So, are you emotionally mature? Do you have what it takes to be one? If not, this is the perfect time for us to transform ourselves. Although this battle would seem hard but trust me, achieving this one will help you conquer more life battles.

Lead image from Pixabay