Relationship with In-Laws

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Written by
4 years ago

They say it's hard to please the in-laws but you have to,since they are your family now, especially when you live with them after marriage. You are on the stage of adjusting the kind of life you are entering, adjusting your relationship with your partner and in-laws. It is not really easy coping all those adjustment, adjusting your budget in coping all the expenses and your first priority is to save, in order to create your own haven. You have to share in financing the expenses incurred in living with them and help in the household chores. If not you will labeled as lazy and the beginning of an unfriendly atmosphere.

There are in-laws who are low profiled,you can easily go with their likes and dislikes, their standard and beliefs, whose lifestyle you can blend with. Living with them will be smooth and flowing steadily as you go on with the current. If you have this, then you are lucky.

But there are high profiled in-laws, whose lifestyle is not within your reach, a double standard, you don't know what is the real personality they have. They have different personality depending on the person they are with or in a situation they are in. With this kind of people, you have to adjust and put down your pride, go on with their music even it is in contrast of your steps, just to be accepted and be one of them, that sometimes you forget who you really are.

Others says, in-laws are the wrecker of a home, they middle the married life of their children especially in conflict, that instead of helping to patch up, mend of what is broken, to heal the wounds, they are even the reason why things got worse, sometimes poisoning the minds of their child, leading to separation.

There are no good or bad in-laws, they are just like us human, not perfect, others are educated and others are illiterate. Whatever their status in life, whoever they are, we must learn to accept them, for there's nothing we can do we are already a part of the family. We are marrying their child, we marry them too, and if they are tag as bandits then we are bandits too. Accepting and learning to love them as we love their child is all we can do, to have a harmonious relationship with them.

They say it is better to have a grudge with your parents than to your parents-in-law because parents can forgive you whatever you have done and love you whoever you are, while parents in-law will not, they will automatically lost their slowly grown feeling of affection to you and will not easily forgive you if they will forgive, it is because there was no blood relation between you and them. It is seldom that in-laws will be in your side during family troubles, they will always defend their child even it is not right thing to do.

In-laws are like men in another planet that you have to study their attitude and disposition in life and learn how to immerse with them whether in the deep or shallow water.

How about are you, how is your relationship with your in-laws or future to be in-laws?

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4 years ago

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I had a bad experience with my late mother in law. She was really against me because of my looks. She bad mouthed me, talk behind my back. I guess that's just how in laws are. When she suffered from cancer, i am the one who take care of her, and b4 she died she ask for forgiveness and thanked me for everything that i have done for her.

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4 years ago

So touching, you are a good daughter in-law, you never retaliate instead you show goodness and cares for her, and God sees what you have done. You are bless for your in-law's heart melt and realized her wrong doing. She put down her pride by way of asking forgiveness even thou its late, for naturally realization comes late. For sure she depart in this world with a light heart and looking at you in heaven with a smile. God bless those who's heart full love, without hatred and revenge.

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4 years ago

Well, I can say my inlaws are low profile, they are good and I am blessed to have them. I can be myself even if we are currently living with them. They treat me like how they treat their son. I respect them and they respect me too.

They have some attitudes too but it's bearable to me after all, all of us have an attitude. I blend enough, as for the house chores I also help. I always make sure that I took care of my baby without disturbing them.

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4 years ago

You are lucky to have an in-laws who are good to you and respect you. Treating you like the way they treat their son, shows you are accepted to be one of the family, and they love their son, that is why they love you too. You blended well with them that means you have adjusted their attitude and they have adjusted with your attitude as well. Your are responsible as a mother and a daughter in-law in the family that makes you more acceptable to them thus, living with in-laws is smooth and peaceful. Keep on being what you are for a harmonious relationship.

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4 years ago

I'm married and I experienced them too like judging me from my looks. .sad...

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4 years ago

That is usually what happened, from head to foot they scrutinized a person, and sometimes they are judgemental. I think everybody will pass those test in life.

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4 years ago

All of us wishes to have a better bond with our partner's family. That is a treasure for us too.

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4 years ago

Its true, that's all our wishes to have a better relationship with the new family to become one of them. Thanks for giving your time.

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4 years ago

You are always welcome

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4 years ago

At first my relationship with my in laws was not good because we are different religion..later on, because he saw his son big change, and now we are ok.everytime we go home he cook a delicious food.so always show them your respect and give them and they will be accepted. Be patience..❤

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4 years ago

yes respect them to earn their respect and have the patience with them. You know old people sometimes our conversation will not correlate with them,, we must have the patience to listen to them and give time to be with them for awhile. Olds need good listener.

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4 years ago

Right sis..respect and patience..

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4 years ago

yes, sis, respect their tribal belief and they will also respect ours, and have patience with them, even though it is difficult to immerse on the kind of conversation they have, for each one of us came from different families, different style of how were mold by our parents so, our attitudes and outlook of life will differ. Great patience must be given when we do not walk on the same line.

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4 years ago

In-laws are the best kind of people if you know how to manage them very well.

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4 years ago

You are also correct on your side of story. Yes, if know how to mingle with them, manage to be good with them, they good to be with. You will be respected if you will respect them.

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4 years ago

Yes respect and the very best way is understanding also.

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4 years ago

You are right friend we have to understand them especially the olds. They are emotional with simple things and slight word that slip from your mouth making into a big deal of topic in the clan. So, we must be careful in our words and actions that might offend them.

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4 years ago

I am not married yet but I think it would go well if we all respect each other

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4 years ago

yes, friend respect be given to them, whoever they are, whatever their status in the community, and where did they came from, if they indigenous or city men called the socialites.

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4 years ago