Loving the Unlovable

Would you agree if I tell you that it's easy to love someone if you know that he/she loves you in return?

I think of us would agree that it's easy as ABC or 123, it's like breathing in and out, it's normal, it's natural... there's nothing too difficult in doing it. But have you ever thought of the kind of love that is defined as the greatest?

If loving someone who loves us in return is too easy to do, will we be given credit for doing it?

Sure, yeah.

But we are conditioned to love those who will return the sentiment, isn't it?

It's so easy to love your family because whatever happens, they're your family, you may have differences and misunderstandings, but at the end of the day, you're still family, and you're bound to love each other. Sometimes, it's not easy, but then again, you're bound to do it, in one way or another.

When we have friends, we treat them as our brothers and sisters, which would eventually make them part of a family that we've built with them. You call someone your friend because you have a relationship that is built on trust and love. I think most of us would say that we love our friends because our friends know and accept us for who we truly are, and it's easy to love them because of that.

In choosing a life partner, most of us would think of a list of qualifications on how we imagine him/her to be. Most often than not, we meet someone who has most of the qualifications, I'm not saying that we compromised our standards, but, come to think of it, that list of good qualities is not realistic to be found in one person only. Now, once you've built a connection, you will learn more about him/her, his/her good traits and also the bad ones, and you will end up accepting him/her, and loving him/her because he/she also accepts you and loves you for smooth and rough edges, your good traits and even your bad ones.

Families, friends, and our special someone are people who are easy to love, for most of the time, they reciprocate the love that we give them... But is this the kind of love that the Bible tells us to have?

The greatest love that is defined by the Bible is the one that is not based on sentiment, but on choice. This kind of love is the "agape", the one that Jesus compels us to have for others, the one which simply can't b answered by "I don't feel like it." The "others" in the statement means not your family or your friend or your special someone. It means the person who you don't talk to, the one from the neighborhood that you abhor, someone that annoys you because of his/her personality, someone that you don't really like, and you don't "feel" as a person. "Others" also mean someone who has hurt you and gives you so much trauma and pain - someone that you hate the most, and would be the very last on your list of people to love... he/she may not be on the list at all.

Now, think about it, would it be easy for you to love the unlovable?

It's not easy. It's as if walking on a tightrope bridging two cliffs without any training, and any protective gear. It's hard, it's unimaginable, it's like a matter of life and death, am I right?

But despite this, God commands us to love others as we love ourselves. God shows us the greatest love that surpasses all understanding. This love is agape. Agape means the highest form of unconditional, selfless, sacrificial love that God has given us and is continually giving us up to this day.

Agape is the kind of love that was given to us by God that when we were still sinners, He loved us by sacrificing His only begotten Son for all of us. It is the kind of love that Jesus showed when He forgave the very ones who nailed Him to the cross. It is the kind of love that Jesus has given to the tax collector, the prostitute, the sinners of this world. It is the love that is given to the most undeserving of it.

It is the kind of love that we should be doing. I know it is difficult to do it, yet, this is what being radical means - to give until there's nothing left, to love until your very last breath... and to whom? To the one who is truly undeserving of it.

If He was able to forgive those who hurt him and even more - love them, love us even though we are sinners... so unworthy of Him... How can we not forgive and love the very ones who hurt us, betrayed us, made false accusations towards us? How can we not forgive and love when He was able to do so?

May this write-up give you time to reflect on what agape love really means, and why should we practice it not only to the ones who love us but also to the ones who are unlovable.

Thanks for reading!