"Shareting" - posting photos and videos on social media is a typical parental joy of these days.
First of all, in this way we maintain a connection and introduce relatives and friends how the child grows, what he has learned and what interests him. Social networks are becoming a "digital mediator" for exchanging news with people and helping us maintain family and family ties. Secondly, it is a way to preserve precious memories. Third, such content can be a way to complain about something, find out that others have similar problems, get support, discover a new approach to those problems, and finally give some advice to less experienced parents and share the experience. Fourth, it is simply common. Likes and enthusiastic comments from other people give importance to our parenting, make it more positive, even if what we publish does not reflect the true.
Parents who have chosen this way to say about themselves that they are good parents, to show their tenderness, sensitivity, care, skills and other desirable qualities through online content, should be aware of the following risks:
Digital kidnapping
The child's photos can be downloaded by malicious people and used in the future to create all sorts of plots and stories, misrepresenting the child in the photo, using it on posters, in adoption ads, cyber violence, etc.
To prevent such situations:
* Check the privacy settings of your account - make photos available only to friends and disable photo sharing
* Talk to family and friends about privacy and ask them not to share the photos you sent them;
* Remove from the list of friends those who are not - friends of friends, those who are just nice to you so you made friends, but who you do not know personally, those who you added out of courtesy, etc.
* Remove metadata and geotags from photos you plan to publish
* Do not add any information that could be used to identify your children - full name, date of birth, school name, etc.
* No photos of naked or half-naked children. If you are not sure whether to post a photo, do not post it.
Breaking the relationship with the child
Popularity, gained at the will of the parents, can inflict severe psychological trauma on a child and ruin his life. The story of Christopher Robin, the prototype of Winnie the Pooh and the son of A. A. Milne, who was teased at school by constantly quoting excerpts from books, is well known, so that in time he began to hate his fame. There are other cases when children's writers used their children as inspiration, and when they were adults, they did not like them at all.
The older the child is, the more dissatisfied he will be due to the fact that his parents use his personality for public appearances and present him in one way or another on the Internet. For example, 71.3% of the thousands of British teenagers aged 12 to 16 surveyed believe that their parents who posted their photos without permission do not respect their right to privacy in the virtual world, and 39.8% say that their parents posted photos because of which children are ashamed of - because they look weird, they are naked, etc. Such posts become a source of tension and conflict, so the relationship between parents and teenagers can be seriously damaged due to online posts. That's why many parents stop posting photos of their children, and if they do, they only allow a reliable circle of people to have access to those photos. Young mothers are increasingly practicing "antisherenting" - when the photo with the children focuses on the context, and the child's face is hidden.
If you still want to post something about your own children, do so carefully. Before you post something, ask yourself these few questions:
* Why are you publishing this? This is probably the most important question. Before you post something, ask yourself this simple question.
* Would you like someone to tell a similar story about you? This is not a perfect comparison, because you can be extroverted and enjoy sharing details from your life, and your child may grow into an introvert who does not like to show off. But if you don't like a photo of your childhood sitting on a stretcher online, you don't need to upload a photo of your child either. If your child is old enough to talk to them about this, ask for permission.
* Could this embarrass your child now or in the future? Of course, embarrassing children is part of parenting. But it is one thing to talk about an awkward situation or show a photo to a best friend or grandmother, and quite another to spread this information around the world. That is not part of our rights, duties and obligations. It's just not ok.
* Is there anyone in space who should not see this photo of your child now or in the future? If yes, do not post. Remember: this photo can one day be seen by employers, staff of educational institutions or possible romantic partners.
* Do you want this to become part of your child's digital footprint? Think about it. You would probably want your child to look smart, well-mannered, kind and successful. Does what you intend to publish help you with that?
Everything is need is to be carefull, cautious and kind.
When my kids were little, their opening an account on Facebook was the only social network back then. I had a code and regular control. They are adults now.