This time, I won’t let fear win - Pejudear
And she asked herself,
What is this unknown thing about fear that tends to held people down from manifesting their true self?
Jennie was so deep in her thoughts......
Looking back at my past life, the only thing i would ever use to describe myself then would be 'fearful'. My self-distrust, and continuous desire for self-confidence started at an early stage of my life when i decided to follow my dream career, and BOOM!!!, it gave birth to this crazy fear that has never been so good to me. It's been really a rough journey, as i have lost several time to fear. I have been so fearful of ever thinking of being perfect, been so fearful of taking huge opportunities that ever come my way.
Oh FEAR!! You have been so unkind to me so many times. Shattered my morale, with all this defeat, self-distrust about me as a person, and my competencies have really grown into something huge.
With all the complements, praises, and recognitions i get from people, i have not succeeded in accomplishing all the goals i set for myself. This slavery of self-distrust and failure, has put me in a small dark box where i have struggled all this years to see a bit of light. Always angry with myself for not accomplishing any of the goals that i had allowed to slip right under my fingertips.
Moving out of her bed and sitting in front of the mirror in the corner of the room....
Jennie talking to the person staring back at her..
You there, staring at me, i have been so angry with you for allowing fear to take a bigger part of your life. But what have you done about this anger, frustration, regrets, nothing. Not until few hours ago that you have realized that fear, and lack of self-confidence has taken over a bigger part of your life.
Pointing at at the person in the mirror, and reminding her of her past mistakes and failures.......
You have no sense of worth, that is why you gave yourself out to the wrong people and they end up threating you bad, just for the fear of not being able to stay alone. You have been so insecured, that is why you have always avoided having great conversation with people, just for the fear of not having anything good to contribute. You have really stopped yourself from trying anything me, all because of fear of making more mistakes.
If you keep on fearing failure, you will never come to the knowledge of knowing the great, and important lessons you will learn from those failures that will help you grow in lot of ways that you have never dreamt of.
Hey you there, from today, i give you the homework of trying out something new, things that will scare you. Try to do things that will put away this silly excuses you have been giving, things that will shut the door of your mind on your fears, but allowing you to be an inch closer to achieving your goals.
Hey you again, all those good dream goals you would never stop thinking about, but you haven't done anything about them because of fear, begin to take a step towards it from today.
Doing something new entirely is extremely scary, but i am challenging you today to work on things you are afraid of, things that will move you into a new space of growth and opportunities, that will help build your sense of worth.
Jennie listen to me, still pointing at the mirror.....
It is likely that you may fail along the way, you should take it as fun since it is part of the process. Know this Jennie, this failure will give you the opportunity to find more strength, learn more, and grow, until you finally succeed. Don't ever think of giving up on those dreams that you have, say no to the all the negative ideas,and voices in your head, have a feel of the fear, and continue moving forward.
Out of her thoughts into reality ...........
Talking to herself now....
For the past few days, i have been so fearful of starting an online class, because i was so afraid of speaking to people. I saw it as something that will never be possible, but the idea kept growing in my mind everyday.
I have now decided to come out of my comfort zone and take the risks, because never will i want to see myself as not good or competent enough, making me to turn my back on the opportunities that will come my way
This time around, i won't let fear win over me. Beginning to build my own rome from today.
Falls on the bed and doses off
Try something new today, that will bring discomfort to you, you will be shock at how good and talented you are. - Pejudear
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