How honest are you with yourself?

Most of us know how important honesty is; we advocate it, we hear about it all the time. Not lying, always following the truth, having an honest attitude towards people... Yes, it's all very true. But in discussing the need to be honest with others, could it be that we are overlooking the fact that we are being honest with ourselves? Do we really know what we want, what we expect, what we think, what we feel, or does our heart say one thing and our brain another?

We get upset when we find out that someone we love has lied to us; we wonder why they don't trust us enough to tell us the truth and we realize that this is a big problem. But why don't we see it as a problem when we are not being honest with ourselves? Living with rose-colored glasses may feel good for a while, but how much of a real life can we live by running away from ourselves...

Moreover, being true to ourselves is not only about living a 'real' life; it is also about living a healthy and long life. Many studies show that individuals who prioritize being true to themselves live healthier and longer lives. If a healthy or long life doesn't convince you that you need to be true to yourself, you might be interested in a different result that research has revealed: People who are honest with themselves experience greater satisfaction in their careers. In the modern world, you may be more interested in the second conclusion.

You don't avoid being alone with yourself and connecting with yourself. You are not afraid to confront your feelings and thoughts; you create time alone with yourself to explore them more closely. You explore ways to connect with yourself, such as meditation, journaling, taking walks in nature, and you accept the truth about yourself, no matter how harsh it may be.

You share your thoughts and feelings freely. You openly express what you think and how you feel, even if you are afraid of criticism or judgment from others. You don't suppress your feelings to make others feel comfortable; you don't worry about whether they agree with your thoughts or not. You speak up for everything you believe in and stand for, even at the risk of feeling vulnerable or embarrassed.

You fulfill your own needs and say no to anything that conflicts with your needs. You know exactly what you need to feel physically, mentally and emotionally balanced and prioritize meeting your needs at the expense of saying no to others. You realize that meeting your own needs is not selfish and that everyone's needs are different. You make arrangements to take good care of yourself; you give yourself enough time and you really believe that it is all right.

You don't expect everyone to like you. You would rather be who you are and not be loved than to be someone you are not and not be loved. You don't constantly try to please others and try to get them to like you. You approve of yourself, love yourself and expect the people around you to love you for who you are. You don't care whether people who try to change you, who don't accept who you are, like you or not.

Not only do you trust that you know what's best for you, but you also put it into practice. You know that no one else lives your life but you and no one else will have to live with the consequences of your choices. Therefore, you make your own choices without feeling the need for validation.

You know that mistakes are an integral part of life and when you do something that is wrong for you, you accept it with maturity and make changes at the social risk of judgment and disapproval. You change direction with courage rather than accepting something that is not right for you.