The Power of Fervent Prayer: Asking for a miracle to conceive

Good day to all of you my read.cash mates, I came across this platform from noise.cash. I've learned more of it from some of my fellow noisemates there such as @momentswithmatti and @Zeshan333. This is my first ever post here. To tell you honestly, I am nervous while writing this post because before I wrote this I've read some of the articles here and they are all good. The quality content of the posts are great and man! I am thinking, a newbie such as myself? how can I be as good as them. So, I am gathering all my strength just so I can have confidence writing my own life experience which I wish to share to all you. This is a long story which started 25 years ago, so make sure you have your popcorn and some drinks with you.... haha, just kidding

Where it all began

Let us turn back the clock and rewind to 1996. My hubby, Joseph and I got married on January 22, 1996. That time Hubby was 26 turning 27 while I was just 20 turning 21 on March 20th so legally I still need a parents consent just so we can marry. We had a simple civil wedding because my father doesn't want us to be married on a church. He said a wedding done in a civil court is more binding so to give in to his request my husband did as a respect to his wishes. I guess my father wasn't ready to give me away for marriage that's why he did not attend my wedding at all. It was okay for me because I and my father are not really on speaking terms. He was such a disciplinarian, so much that I hated him for being such a tyrant. Anyways, that would be another story. I don't want to mess my emotions here. Because, I am a newly wed.... haha. Let's go back. When we got married we already have a house. Hubby is such a very responsible man even during his bachelor years he already started building his own house. He was truly prepared to settle down. So, on our wedding the reception was done in his house which is now my house as well. We had such great time together as a couple. We love the same things. He respects what I love and like, loves me unconditionally and I was the same to him. Our house was not yet finished when we got married but it has all the complete sections a house would have. One bedroom, a living room, dining area, kitchen, toilet and bath but it is not yet fully done. The bathroom and kitchen has no tiles yet. There is a sink but no tiles. It was still bare, it still lack the finishing's. He focused on the main parts of the house which is the bedroom and on the living room. Since we both have jobs, little by little we were able to do this and that. Until we had put on the final touches of the main house. After a year hubby thought of purchasing our first car, just a second hand model because we needed it for our daily commute to work. Two years from our marriage, we became pregnant, Oh my, I was so excited and so happy. This will be our very first child and having a child is what all couples dream of having because the child will complete their lasting love together. The couple will now become a family. That time I was working. We consulted an obstetrician for my monthly prenatal check-up. The third month of my pregnancy I had some trouble. I experienced some spotting which is dangerous for it may cause miscarriage. True indeed, we were not able to save the baby and I had a miscarriage. I was really sad because my husband and I were ready to become parents but we lost it. My doctor was not able to save our baby. She gave me some medicine to help stop the miscarriage but it was too late. The morning she gave me some medicine to help stop the bleeding that evening I lost our baby. It was painful for me, I had to undergo a D and C procedure.

Dilation and curettage (D&C) is a procedure to remove tissue from inside your uterus. Doctors perform dilation and curettage to diagnose and treat certain uterine conditions — such as heavy bleeding — or to clear the uterine lining after a miscarriage or abortion.

This procedure is a bit painful on the insides. Having a miscarriage is the same as giving birth to a baby when it comes to filing our government maternal benefits under our Social Security System. I have to heal so I was on leave at work for a month.

Several years have passed, my husband and I tried to get pregnant. We don't use any contraceptives but to no avail. So we both went to a Reproductive endocrinologists (sometimes referred to as REs) are what most people think of as fertility specialists. A reproductive endocrinologist is a gynecologist who has additional training in infertility and fertility treatment; they treat both male and female fertility issues.

We worked out for many years like up to the 6th year from my miscarriage but still I won't get pregnant. My officemates would always tease me when we have gatherings because I will bring my nieces or nephews to the family party just so I have a child with us. They would often say, You always borrow kids from your relatives you should make your own. Hubby and I just laugh at the matter but for me deep inside they just don't know the pain I am dealing. They don't know that I am crying at night. I was thinking what if I could not give my husband a child. What if he would look for another woman just so he can have his child with. I am already fighting a battle mentally. Six years have passed and yet still nothing happened. On the seventh year. That was when I was really so upset. My office mates would not dare make fun of me or they would even change the subject when it comes to having a child because they know I was already like a tiger. I would react differently, I would argue with anyone who makes fun of me who would tease me of not having my own child. This was the time when I was really drawn closer to the Lord. In my religion we observe the law of Fasting every first Sunday of the month. I received a guidance that why not try to fast and say my fervent prayers to God. So, I did. I cried unto the Lord, I poured out my soul to him. I surrendered everything to him. I did an honest, truthful supplication to him. I got mad at him, I blamed him, I asked for reasons why hasn't he not given me a child. What is the purpose of my uterus if I could not have a child. The many what if's? the why's? For hours I would talk to him and cried to him. I did this for months. I never talked to anyone about what I am dealing. The pain of seeing couples so happy, having their own child. Even seeing a baby had an effect on me. I was deeply affected by it. The joy that I had was replaced by sadness.

I can vividly remember, it was November 2001 and again Christmas celebrations is coming. The thought of having family gatherings really made me choke and vomit. This was the year that I hated Christmas already. I don't feel the Christmas cheer. I did not put up any Christmas decors in our house. It was like part of me died already. I lost hope. So, again the first Sunday of the month. I cried again to the Lord, poured out everything to him. Made promises to him to let him know that I would do anything , really anything just as long as He would give me a child. I told him, I am ready to become a mother. Until when will I have to wait , Lord? It has been seven years already. You said you will make our burdens light If we will cast our yokes upon You so please, please I beg of you Father to please grant my prayer, Please, let me become a mother. I am ready, Please make me whole and complete. This were my last sentences to him. I surrendered! I gave everything to Him. I told him from now on, You will take over my life and I said, I will not be bitter anymore, I have to accept my fate. If you think it is not my time yet, so be it. I will just have to go with the flow. I don't want to live in sadness anymore because it is eating me and killing me from the inside. I just let go. From then on after my prayer. I vowed to be happy again, to be joyful again. To not be affected when I see couples very happy. When I see babies. I tried my best to overcome my pains of not having one.

Then the New Year 0f 2002 came. It was mid January and I was inside the bathroom, it suddenly dawned on me that I have not opened my sanitary pad. Every month I would buy one pack for a months use. So, I said, oh my! I did not have my period last month? how come my sanitary pad is still closed and not used? My heart suddenly started to beat fast. I was nervous. I was happy that It was not opened yet. I had mixed emotions. I kept on saying Thank you Lord if what I am thinking is happening. I did not tell my husband right away. The following day, I bought three pregnancy kits, I wanted to be sure. When I came home that night. Hubby and I just ate dinner then he left for work again because he had to do a night operation, He had an overtime at work. When he left, I was just calm and I prepared my pregnancy kits, then I did the test. Man, oh man! All three kits were positive. There were two lines on each of them. Can you imagine what I did when I saw this three little kits, seeing the two lines. How could these lines be so relieving. That time, these two pink lines were my joy. I was really shouting and crying while kneeling. I was so happy. my goodness just so, so , so Happy! I thanked the Lord for answering my prayers. My husband came home around 2am. I was not asleep, I could not sleep, I was so happy. He thought I was asleep already. In our kitchen, we have an island, I placed the three pregnancy kits on top of the island so He could see them. While I was at the bedroom door peeking so I could see his reactions. If only I had a camera that time, I would have captured the moment when He saw it. He was holding the kits and then he knelt down and cried. I could not bare not to go to him so, I went outside the bedroom and I hugged him. We were both hugging each other while crying. We then said our prayers together. I let him lead the prayer of gratitude. It was such a lovely prayer. You can really feel that my husband was ready to become a father. I thought I was the only one in pain but on that prayer hubby expressed the joys he felt and it ended his sorrows as well. He was just not so vocal about it because he doesn't want to hurt me but He said deep inside He too was in pain. Both of us opened up and the whole morning we were just talking until the break of dawn. The following day, we both filed a leave of absence and went directly to a new obstetrician, now a specialist and also a family friend. We found out, I was already on my first Trimester term. I was shocked because it has been three months already since I had my heart to heart, letting go, My surrendering supplication to the Lord. I did not even realize that I was already pregnant and that He already answered my prayers.

Realization

My realization was that if you put your whole trust to the Lord, in his perfect time He will grant you your hearts desire specially when He knows it is beneficial for you. He knows us better than we know ourselves. We just have to patiently wait with a heart full of gratitude, with Faith unceasing. It took me five more years to have this realization, it hit me the time when I knew I was with child. Right there and then I knew that I was loved and that Heavenly Father really listens and answers all our prayers. All I did was I surrendered everything to him.

Enduring the nine months

All through out my second pregnancy, I was in and out of the hospital. First trimester, I again experienced some spotting so I have to file a leave from work just so I can rest. Every month we were in the hospital. On my fourth month my OB-gyn found out that I have what you call a placenta previa.

Placenta previa (pluh-SEN-tuh PREH-vee-uh) occurs when a baby's placenta partially or totally covers the mother's cervix — the outlet for the uterus. Placenta previa can cause severe bleeding during pregnancy and delivery. If you have placenta previa, you might bleed throughout your pregnancy and during your delivery.

This was the reason why I had to be hospitalized every month so they can stop the bleeding. They have to sedate both me and my baby so that the baby will not keep on moving and will cause bleeding. The bleeding could cause a contraction on my cervix which will then lead to my early delivery and we don't want that because I will end up having a still born if this will happen. So my doctor was really monitoring me closely. I was not allowed to stand up, I was just lying on bed wearing diapers or will just sit on the bed during the course of my pregnancy. It was really very hard specially to my husband because he has to work and I will be left alone in the house. That time we had no help. My mother-in-law was in the US, my mother runs a store and needs to keep it up and running because it was their source of livelihood. Some of my siblings that time were working, have their own lives to live, some are still young and could not help me because they also go to school. So it was just the two of us. Imagine, hubby would prepare my meals for breakfast then he would leave for work then lunch time he would come home again for our lunch. He would give me a bath. He does the laundry, clean the house. He would do all the chores, He does everything. When I was in the hospital he would just leave me with the nurses care. So, he always gives them extra food like pizza, burger, spaghetti etc. in return for their taking care of me because literally I was living in the hospital.

My Last trimester

The complete full term of pregnancy is 40 weeks, nine months. On my 35th week, My Eighth month. I was bleeding profusely. My doctor advised us that on the 37th week, I will have to be scheduled for a C-section because they can no longer prolong the prevention of my bleeding, my placenta previa case. I had to be asleep for two weeks so both me and my baby will be just sleeping, we already knew the gender because they did a hysteroscopy.

A hysteroscopy is a procedure that allows a health care provider to look at the inside of a woman's cervix and uterus. It uses a thin tube called a hysteroscope, which is inserted through the vagina. The tube has a camera on it. The camera sends images of the uterus onto a video screen.

During my first ultra sound on my sixth month, we could not see the gender because the baby was always upside down. Not until during the hysteroscopy that was the time we knew what the gender was. We would want it to be a surprise but on the screen you can see right away his genitals. So my doctor said , Oh! that's why he is very active, keeps on moving because you have a baby boy.

We thought my baby was a girl. So we only prepared a girls name because a lot of our friends said that our baby was a girl due to some signs. Like my neck was not that black, I still look good (ahem ahem) even if I looked like a bulging pear..... ahaha. Maybe just to give me a boost.

Sleeping beauty

So for the next two weeks, we were just sound asleep. I would wake up from time to time but always felt groggy and sleepy. The nurses would always check on my back because It might me sweaty and wet so I was really like in ICU. Hubby would always change our beddings, my clothes. He had to run home to do the laundry and go back again to the hospital and had to work. Hubby lost weight. He can't sleep because of our situation. He can't wait for us to go home already. All we have to do was wait for me to be on my 37th week. Then, they can open me up.

The Big Day

I was already on my 37th week. The night before my C-section, my Ob-gyn came together with my anesthesiologist. To give me a briefing on what to do the following morning. Where to inject the anesthesia, that I needed to curl up to form a letter C so they could inject it on my spine. They told me what to expect and what they will do to me. For how long the procedure would last.

Spinal: A woman whose C-section is planned in advance will typically receive a spinal, also known as a subarachnoid block. The anesthesiologist injects pain medication, typically a combination of an opiate and a local anesthetic, through the lower back into the spinal fluid, bathing the spinal cord.

5 am the following morning, August 20th. The nurses did a prep. They injected me with a medicine that would make me feel drowsy in preparation for my anesthesia. They then brought me to the operating room. I was there 7am. I could hear them talking, they told me to form the letter C, I felt a small tinge of the needle but because I was already groggy I could no longer feel the pain that much. After that I could feel like I was being shaken. I could still hear them because my anesthesia was not a full anesthesia like all through out the procedure I could hear them but my eyes were closed. I don't know how long it took them to open me up. Then after that I heard my doctors voice, she said, Oh! here is your baby Joie, a cute baby boy. Then I heard his cry but I cannot open my eyes then I fell asleep. I woke up that evening around 8pm. I was asleep for more than 12 hours already. They brought me inside my hospital room. Hubby told me I was talking nonsense while sleeping. The effect of the medicine.

The following day, August 21. We were waiting for him to be brought to us from the nursery room since morning but they brought him after lunch. Oh my! our angel. The pain I felt went away the moment I saw our tiny bundle of Joy.

My son is now 18 years old. He completed our lives. The wait was worth it. The ride was all worth it. We tried to get pregnant again but we we were unsuccessful. At least we had one and we are eternally grateful to our Father in Heaven. Having a child is really what the essence of being a woman is all about.

I learned to put all my trust in Him. To always keep my faith and never doubt. I know in his own good beautiful perfect time He manifested and answered my desire and that is to become a Mother.