Morbid Thoughts I have not been feeling well since Saturday. We have non-stop rains here at our city because we had a typhoon it has exited the country already but we still experience the monsoon rains. A lot of the barangays here in our area have been flooded already which is a perennial problem. Our work is always outside for we provide maintenance services to our clients, mainly building maintenance service but since the facilities we maintain are far that even during heavy rains we still do our jobs like emergency works. We are called to do some clearing and cleaning of clogged sump pit area on Pumping Stations in the river, clearing of fallen trees blocking the access roads going to the pump houses specially during this rainy season. I am always together with the team because my job is to provide snacks for the team like preparing hot noodles for them on site and some coffee just so they won't feel cold and it's hard to work hungry. So, these days this is what we were doing, I always get wet from the rain thinking of being a teenager still. Haha Now the rains has taken its toll on me. Since Saturday I am experiencing a high fever with cough and cold, having sore throat and muscle aches as well. Hubby was reading about the symptoms of covid-19, generally what I was feeling fell on the category. Hubby jokingly told me that he will bring me to the hospital and I said what? you want me to be hospitalized and going out in an urn? Plus you will charged with half a million pesos of Doctor's professional fee because they say I have covid-19.... NO thanks. I told him I just have a flu, just a simple flu no more no less. Then last night, I experienced a very hot temperature and now I have morbid thoughts thinking that what if I have covid, what will happen to my family? what if I will die? I will not be able to see my son graduate from College. Who will take care of my son and hubby and worse yet, my husband will remarry? Oh my goodness, my thoughts are eating me alive. This covid mania has really affected me. It's hard not to hear about this pandemic because everywhere you go it is the topic. Then I gathered my strength and said a prayer. Suddenly, I felt calm and peace inside. It's like the Lord has touched me and all my morbid thoughts were washed away. I told him I surrender everything to you My Lord. Please heal me, protect me so I can take care of my family. I fell asleep it felt like an angel was singing a lullaby to me.

God really hears us. Try to live a life that whenever you need the Lords blessings, He will give it to you not out of mercy but because you are worthy.

Remember you are loved.

as always, @lovejoie