Frustration and disappointment after a success: Lessons and Realizations

27 63
Avatar for kli4d
Written by
3 years ago

Note: This is a little bit short and I don't know if this article makes sense.

It was a roller coaster ride of emotion these past few days. I finally graduated from senior high school and received an honorable award. However, after that, I received an email from the scholarship that I applied for; I failed to pass the exam. How the realm can immediately reverse your feelings and situation is amazing and shocking at the same time. After a success, frustration and disappointment were in the queue.

I was hesitant to tell my parents about the result because they are the ones who are more excited than me, and they will be disappointed for sure if I tell them about it.

It took me several attempts to finally reveal the truth. My mother is not that happy with the outcome. I can see to her reaction that she's disappointed, and I understand that knowing college is too expensive without a scholarship or cash assistance.

She asked what part of the exam did I have difficulty answering and I said on the numerical part. I will not deny the fact that I am not good at numbers. Since elementary mathematics is my most hate subject. So as a solution, I often attend Math classes to improve a bit my skills in it. But after attending several classes, nothing changed; still meh.

When she heard that I had difficulty with the numerical part of the exam, she started to lowkey condemn me. "If you just study hard, if you are just good at math, maybe you can pass the exam.", as far as I can remember, that what she said. Though not exact words, it's the exact thought.

I understand her frustration and disappointment, and I wholeheartedly accepted what she said. Sometimes, we can't control our mouths if we are overwhelmed by our emotions. I am sure she will realize that later on and I will let the conscience do its part.

I realized that how matter how big is your accomplishments, you are not still exempted from judgment when you fail on something.

I also learned that we should always be mindful of words we are throwing at someone; always use your head before opening your mouth. Our words may wreck someone's feelings and confidence.

After that, I asked some of my pals who also took the scholarship if they passed the exam. All of them, unfortunately, said no. Some of them had trouble with the vocabulary and comprehension part of the exam, which the simplest part for me. Some of them told that the numerical part is just a piece of cake.

While we are sharing our experiences on the group chat, I again realized that this exam validates one thing; every student or individual has their strengths and weaknesses.

Since I failed to progress at the scholarship, it also means that I don't have a university to go to yet. I am having a tough time finding a university near my area as they have no vacancies left. I tried to apply at Pamantasan ng Manila (University of Manila) a few months ago but my application is rejected since they prioritized the residents of their place. I also tried to inquire about Batangas State University but they're not allowing a student to take a Computer Science program if you're, not a STEM graduate. This has left me an option to just enroll in private universities which can cost me P100,000 per semester or school year, plus the equipment and stuff that I need to buy for my studies. I also have this choice where I am planning to quit for a while and find some part-time job to sustain my needs and save money for college.

The truth slams me again; how come that I didn't do my very best at the exam. How come that I became too complacent. If I just passed the scholarship, I would never face this situation. How about my future? These thoughts keep on running and running on my head. It makes me sad, disappointed and frustrated all at the same time.

I realized that I am not a child anymore. I am already on the stage of adulthood where everything seems complicated. Where everyone is fighting to survive. Where everyone is trying their best to prove themselves. And realizing this makes me scared and doubtful about my future.

Final thoughts...

I realized that we're not always on the top of the circle of life. Maybe you are celebrating today but tomorrow you will face the tragedy of your life or vice versa.

Regardless, the right and expected thing to do is to accept it. Though it's hard, it's part of the process. All I can do is move forward and continue building the block for your future. The important thing is the lessons we learned that we can use in our journey in the future.


You can check my recent articles...

17
$ 35.94
$ 35.29 from @TheRandomRewarder
$ 0.10 from @Meyzee
$ 0.10 from @ExpertWritter
+ 10
Sponsors of kli4d
empty
empty
empty
Avatar for kli4d
Written by
3 years ago

Comments

Medyo kinakabahan ako ngayong ma-g-grade twelve na ako next sy and sana may mahanap akong scholarship gaya nila ate car at magtatanong ako ng PM sa kaniya since magkakalapit lang kami ng lugaw at same kami ng pinag-aralan na school sa senior high. Praying to find a scholarship. Kung wala kang makitang school, try to find a scholarship na malapit sa inyo. Ma-i-ipon na nga ako ng BCH para kung sakaling may aberya eh haha

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Oo guds na mindset yan. Buti nga naisipan mong gamitin sa business yang bch mo at oara di lang natutulog. Good luck sa journey :))

$ 0.00
3 years ago

This is sad. Pag may expectations talaga yung iba satin ang hirap. Dati may narinig ako na "ang talino nyang si ano bakit ganon, anong nangyare?" parang sa kabila ng taas ng expectations nila sayo biglang parang nawala lahat dahil lang sa isang bagsak mo. May kanya kanya naman nga tayong galing, hindi tayo madedefine ng isang pagkakamali. Fighting lang! πŸ’š I know there's something better na nakalaan for you. :)

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Kaya nga minsan mas natutuwa pa ako pag walang nag eexpect sakin hahaha. Sa ganung paraan unti lang madidisappoint. Sana nga po may mas better na nakalaan :))

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Pwd ka naman mag apply sa ibang schools? Writing here on readcash can also be a part time job.. Minsan mas malaki pa nga kita daily compare sa min wage jan sa pinas πŸ˜… Wag mawalan ng pag asa. matalino kna man..pwd kpa mag apply sa iba

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Medyo mabilis po kasi magkaubusan ng slots sa state universities since mahal sa private pero I am hoping na makahanap nang maayos at afford na schools :)). Thank you po

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Have you every given thought to vocational-technical education, like those offered by TESDA? The Filipino mindset is very frustrating, to say the least. We put a premium on education, but the concept imprinted in the mind is a 4-year college degree. How many college graduates actually get a good paying job that makes use of their education once they are out of college? Yet, there are many students with skills they can harness and become easily employable. Many who succeed in life don't necessarily have college degrees. But they had skills, which they developed, studied, honed then found work where they excelled at. Widen your options. Who knows your destiny might take you somewhere far better.

$ 0.00
3 years ago

I am planning to take that po maybe if I had a hard time getting into college this year. Nasa option ko din po yan na kung pwede after college, magtake ako nyan. Noted po! :))

$ 0.01
3 years ago

Best of luck to you... Better things are coming to you.

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Hindi din ako pumasa noong mga panahon na after grad ko apply na agad ng scholarship. Hindi naman sila nag eexpect pero alam ko naman na alam na nila ang kasunod hahaha pero hirap din akong tanggapin yung like nararamdaman mo at walang nasa tabi ko that time.

Actually, nakapasa talaga sana ako if di naputol yung lapis ko. Wala akong pantasa haha nakalimutan ko magdala. Kasi highest lang naman e 70 pataas eh 68 nakuha ko doon 🀧 over 200 lol. Di ako nakapag answer sa Math diko natapos. Kaya sayang yon at hanggang ngayon naalala ko padin. HaysπŸ€¦πŸ»β€β™€οΈ Pero okay lang kasi Trial lang naman. Pag pumasa mag aaral pag hindi wag nalang work nalang agad. Pero beset din ang Covid ayon ang ending di nakapag work.

Pero alam mo clipuu, Ganyan talaga sa buhay. Hindi sa lahat ng oras matutupad lahat ng gusto natin. Kailangan din natin ma fail para next time alam na natin ang gagawin natin. Magiging isa yan sa rason kung bakit mas tatatag ka, magiging rason yan para lumaban ka ulit. Maraming opportunities na darating sayo kaya wag kang susuko. ☺️

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Thank you, Jam. Its uplifting to hear something like this from you. Yung about don sa score mo, you have done a great job, as always πŸ‘Œ. Makakahanap ka din ng work na mamahalin mo. I manifest 🀞🏼

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Oo naman makakahanap din. πŸ˜‚ Kahit anong work basta masaya ako ☺️ Thank you.

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Hindi din ako pumasa, puro English kasi dun ako mahinaπŸ™„ besides, kulang talaga sa time to analyze the poem and sentence. 5 mins for 20 items haha. Hindi ko pa nga nasasabi sa parents ko ang result I also don't know how to say itπŸ˜„ Wala bang public diyan sa lugar niyo? Mahal naman ng 100k

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Mabilis kasi maubusan ng slots sa college dito yawa lalo na sa mga state universities. Kaya mga pravte univ ang nagiging option saming napag iiwanan hahaha

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Dito din naman buti nakahabol ako.

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Sorry to hear this. But you know what? Things doesn't just stoo there. Your life will not stop just because you failed at one thing. I still believe that greater things are in store for you. God deosn't allow things to happen without reasons and I have hopr that He has bigger and greater plans for you. Sometimes no is not really a rejection, it is maybe a redirection. Just keep holding and don't lose hope. Our God is able.

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Yep, I always remember that. I know He's creating something. Something much greater than we expected. Maybe this is just a challenge? for me to be prepared for the things He made for the future

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Yep that is exactly right πŸ€—

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Mahirap talaga pagka may naabot ka tapos bigla bagsak kasi yung expectations ng mga tao satjn grabe din ang taas. Same sayo, ilang beses na din ako nag take for scholarship pero iba ni reject kesyo ganito ganyan, only to find out my sabotage. Pero anyway okay na ko, nakatapos na. Alam ko malalampasan mo yan. Laban ka lang. Ok? Mayas better plan si God sayo

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Minsan nga po naiisip ko na what if wag ko nalang galingan para di sila mag expect ng mataas sakin πŸ˜…. Pero hirap kasi maging mahirap tapos magiging ganun pa perspective mo. Kaya kailangan mo talaga magsikap. Siguro nga po may better plan sa'kin si God. Maybe He's preparing something bigger to me :))

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Yes He is. Kaya wag ka mawalan ng hope. Mawawala din yang feelings nila dahil sa di mo pagpasa. ☺️

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Ayt, sorry about thay Clipuuuuuuu πŸ˜₯, kaakibat talaga ng kasayahan ang lungkot. Pinasaya ka ng isang tapos sa sunod πŸ˜₯. Pero pag subok lang yan Clipuuuuuuu, for sure makakahanap ka din ng solution. And about your Mom, ganyan naman talaga sa una diba nakakapag salita sila ng ganyan pero dala lang ng frustration yan for sure. Basta kaya mo yan, Fightuuuu Clipuuuuuuu πŸ’ͺπŸ’ͺπŸ’ͺ🌢️❀️

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Thank you ate. Baka nga po sa frustrations lang. Naiintindihan ko naman po :))

$ 0.00
3 years ago

For sure yan, soon susupport na ulit yan sayo. Baka nga gumagawa na din sila ng paraan di mo lang alam πŸ€—πŸ€—

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Php 100 000.0 ! Wtf that cost a lot. My college only costs, 8kphp per sem on our province, local college! These days its really hard to get a school for college. Is there any local colleges in your area?

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Meron naman ate kaso ang bilis maubusan ng slots. Tapos hindi din tunatanggap ng hindip angkop ang strand sa kukunin na course

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Ay oo nga pala iba na ngayon.

$ 0.00
3 years ago