Maybe you actually knew where did I get the title at this kind of blog and if you were not yet already know, then I will explain it to you.
It was inspired by the common English proverb " An apple a day keeps the doctor a day." The reason behind those words were acting just like the same why I'm writing here, but it's kinda different if how would I elaborate what's the reason about my anxiety that I occurred.
I have too many questions that I need to answer. Am I the one who went suddenly crazy when I realize that I didn't release any article for this day? Or am I the only one who like to type on my keyboard of my own thoughts then I will publish it every day to earn tips and likes? Aside from that, am I the only one who was contented when he saw his upvotes anticipated from the bot and few users?
Then if that's the case, then could I call myself a psycho stupid writer?
Okay, kidding aside.
I’m not sure if why there have some times that I'm timorous or frightened when I didn't produce another blog after 24 hours of release. I always thought that I could get less exposure from the readers if I would not do that.
Sometimes, I easily get irritated when I've not published my pending articles because I want to gain more profit by posting it all but I realized that I should not publish articles because it's not good to my account. I know you would say that I'm insane, but that's right.
Apart from that, I often get feel relief and stress when I'm writing my articles. It doesn't mean that writing is just a piece a cake and our time could never be adjusted. I don't know why, but I feel that the time was so precious when I'm writing and I also feel stress when I want to write the things that I could not write.
This article was first written on my Writer Plus app, then I'm always checking if I got tips or not from the bot or even to some generous users. My heart warmed on happiness when I would see that simultaneous and continuous giving tips of Rusty and some of my subscribers out there who likes my content.
I'm randomly hitting "kilig" when I would see upvotes, likes and comments that were added to my articles and I just wanna hug you tight virtually. Of course, that's would I feel since I'm a typical man who always appreciate every single cent or efforts that they did just to make me smile. I know it sounds cringe, but if when I saw that my articles made more than one dollar,then I feel like I was the happiest student living on Earth.
Another reason why I'm getting anxiety if I didn't publish article in a day is "Every cents is a must." I used to write more articles to earn more profit and even it's just small, I still appreciate those things. My ultimate goal of this month is to buy a phone after two months.
I didn't know if what I'd feel was right, but I'm kinda sure that I'm not the only one who were feeling this kind of scenario. I'm getting nervous when I've not been published one article yet, but still, I'm happy because I have a few readers reading my work but it depends on my content and it's title.
In spite of that, my article were not good unlike to others, but I'm glad that I actually gaining knowledge upon writing because I found out that this is the passion that what I want and it slowly becoming a part of my everyday routine.
At first, I thought that I only want to solve math problems because that's my ultimate talent that only chosen people could only attain that. I'm not that good, but I know that I can.
Writing keeps my anxiety goes away and if I didn't write one article because of modules, I often get stressed and I don't know why.
Maybe I'm addicted, but should I need to go into the doctor just to check what's my disparity? I bet you said that it was normal but I will control it starting today.
Am I went addicted or it's just only an anxiety? I know that anxiety is not a joke, but based on what I said and discussed with you, is that anxiety or I just got hallucinated of what I supposed to think?