My Heart is Broken for My Sister

I guess every Filipino is shocked of the most trending issue on social media today, it was the Jason Hernandez and Moira Dela Torre breakup.

So let me set aside my two draft articles. I want to talk about this right now because I want to share something to release my pain.

There has been a lot of celebrity failed marriage all over the news these days. One is the Johnny Depp-Amber Heard that lead them both standing in court. But theirs is a different story, though.

Let's talk about cheating and infidelity. As we see on social media, this is the main reason of celebrities getting their marriage into waste.

Well talking about breakups, our family were shocked as well when my father posted a comment in our group chat. We had different reactions, mostly harsh especially my aunts. My father also posted a comment in one of my niece's pictures that shocked everyone including friends and relatives.

When I knew about it, I burst into anger. What happened way back in September, 2021 was a tragedy to us. I lost my sister because of Covid, she was pregnant and unfortunately, she had a very complicated condition. The baby survived but she didn't. Few months after she died my brother had the chance to visit their place where her husband asked permission. My sisters husband explained to him that he's too young and that he might need company in raising his kids. He got the approval of my brother.

I guess he also asked permission from my father. They gave him the blessing and ofcourse as a man and a human being, it is his right to choose his own happiness. He never talked to me after the loss.

Why am I so affected with this news?

My brother in-law is getting married to another woman just 9 months after losing my sister. Isn't that a little disrespectful? I am totally offended by this move. I mean, I was thinking if he really loved her, he wouldn't just replace her in less than one year. I've heard his explanations from my cousins. He just said, he has "needs" as a man. Why would he think that way? Maybe he's out of his mind or what, it really just broke my heart for my sister.

My cousin calmed me down and told me not to judge him without knowing his side. So I decided to send him a message. I started the conversation with a joke. We are very good friends, after all. I was always on his side as I recall, when he and my sister would fight over nonsense things. That was way back when they were so happy together. The time before they separated as a couple.

Then he revealed something to me that maybe nobody knows even my sister. This made me cry a lot. It broke my heart into pieces knowing that this would put my sister's soul into tears. She would've been so jealous. If you could imagine her just standing around the corner watching over us and seeing all of this. She would've been crying by now.

Here are some of our conversations...

I told him I wanted a good person who will take care of my sister's children. Those kids were so precious to her. She loved them so much and I want this love to be given to them as she wanted.

During the time that they were separated, she raised the kids alone and pushed herself to become an OFW just to provide for them.

I hope her husband would not waste all of my sister's struggles and hard work just to establish and raise a good person out of her kids.

I have seen how much she valued her kids more than anything. No matter how hard it is to become a single mother. While this man is away, although he supports the kids financially, my sister is the one who focused on them as a mother. She never left them even if she was away and looking for a better life for them. The communications were always open. She cries and misses them everyday. When she came back to the Philippines, it's the three of them who has always been together. She and her two sons were inseparable. They were mother and sons and more than that. Just like best friends.

The next conversations really blown me away. He revealed more about his new girlfriend, turned out to be an old one. That all my sister's life, she knew he didn't have a girlfriend when they met. That she was the first girlfriend since they started being together in high school.

This girl was his first girlfriend as you can see the above screenshot. I was stunned by his response. She even tried to surprise him but she was surprised to see him and my sister together. And he's got the nerve to introduce her to my sister as his cousin. I felt pity for both girls.

The most painful part is this one. Although, at the time that they were separated brother in-law got the chance to get back together with his first girlfriend but she gave him up for his family, for his children. My sister became like a chance passenger in his boat. I didn't know what to feel about this. I was just crying reading his message.

It felt like they were waiting for a chance to be together again. Too bad and unfortunate that their chance will be the death of my sister. I suddenly remembered the song "Traitor" by Olivia Rodrigo, there's this line "guess, you didn't cheat, but you're still a traitor". It's just sad. I'm sad that they had to end this way and that he would start a new life with his true love from the loss of my sister.

What hurts me the most is the fact that he felt obliged to go back home just because their child needs them and not that he loves her that much. He loves another person and I guess that's what they call "emotional cheating??". Whatever that is, it's still close to cheating. Cheating over my sister's feelings.

I know my sister had relationships, too, during their separation but getting back with her husband is a genuine feeling of love and looking for true love which turned out to be not what she really thought and felt it was. It's just so unfair and I'm bleeding inside knowing all of this straight from the man she thought loved her truly.

However, I'm thankful for the fact that he made my sister happy while they were together. They even celebrated their wedding anniversary. I never thought he had fake feelings, my sister got pregnant after that. He went back to sail, leaving my sister again, then she got Covid at 7 months of her pregnancy. So so tragic...

Somehow, this man had sacrificed his own feelings just to keep his family but that's kind of unfair. I just hoped he was able to tell the truth to my sister before she was gone.

For now, I only want what's best for my sister's children. They lost their mom, they still have their dad. I pray that they'll be happy and be raised well by their new family. I pray for everyone's happiness, especially the girl who set aside her love for my nephews, for my sister as well. I hope my sister is at peace right now. She'll be happy to see her kids being treated well by their stepmother.

I'm still crying while writing this. ..