Again, I spend the days in the streets of this expatriate in a boredom while pouring out with all my loneliness.
These days, a German man I meet every morning says "Morgun" every time I pass.
His face sometimes scares me, why? I read a book called "Treblinka Hell". In this book, he described how Hitler tortured innocent people and drowned them in gas chambers and threw them in furnaces while they were alive.
What is described in this book is horrible. I wonder what date people had this brutality on children
But here is the truth, there is a truth that has been seen.
That's why this country frightened me. Maybe there is no such thing now, but now there is xenophobia. There are attacks on the roads and sometimes I am afraid again.
But I have beliefs and prayers in me, God protects me.
Sweetheart,
When I get home, I put my flag on the wall and the pictures on there console me a bit. Sometimes I feel so full and tired of the pain of separation that I talk to them first, that is, with pictures ... I find some comfort and then go to bed immediately. Good thing I'm sleeping. Otherwise, the unbearable pain will not keep me alive! Now if you know how my hands and eyes burn as you write these lines.
How much strength God has given people to endure. Otherwise, how to endure such pain and fatigue.
My dear, maybe I could not write these lines to you anymore. You ask why ?
One evening I was returning home tired again. I was walking in the middle of the road, I do not know how it happened, a woman and a rather old woman suddenly grabbed my arm and threw me aside, we both got away. I narrowly avoided being under the tram.
Yes, there was someone who always protected me.
Sweetheart,
On some weekends, we would go to a relative who was far away from us and stay there if we couldn't get back early. If you know, this change is good for me these days, I would be happy.
When I came to this house, it was as if I was getting my own family. there were five girls in the house.
He was sleeping in the same room with them, and if you knew, that day was going by completely different. It's like a feast day. We were already going to them on holidays. We had nobody else around here.
Already in the loneliness of the expat, if you have a relative, it was a big thing. I was getting a little bit hopeful and happy in his longing heart.
Coming to and from work continued at full speed. I was opening the workplace at six in the morning and I was working here alone until half past eight, until the employees arrived.
These two and a half hours belong to me while I was doing things in the morning, listening to a cassette, having breakfast while listening to him, watching around on the busiest street of the bazaar in this glass-covered workplace. Then my friends came one by one and work fatigue started.
Thus, the support of my friends and my whole day of work with them distracted me, so the days were a little happy.
I send my warm love and greetings, my dear, from the cold, cold evenings of expatriation. Again with that sad song for you.