Why is it so easy to slide back?

And after all that I've said it is just easy to throw them away. I promised this and that, made some resolution to execute this or that. But when I am caught up in my emotions I forget my commitments and I just indulge in my sadness or whatever.

After all the words I spoke, words I've written, words I advised myself. After all those release of bold statements of taking a changed path, for the better, for one's own good, for a better life...

After all those... I am here, back to where I was. Back to where I've been. A cycle of promising and then promising again, and again and again but in the way going back to the way things were.

It is so easy to go back to the old ways. It is so easy to just forget about changing for the better. It is so easy to give up. It is so easy to just slump in a corner and isolate oneself. So very easy to simply freeze with the cold.

When the sun is beautiful and the people are smiling and the mood is so set, it is so hard to stick to resolutions. When they show up with good persuading aura, you just forget about the past fights.

When you pass by the windows of those nice cafes, you just enter the place like you've got money on your pocket. When you get hungry because of your supposed 'diet,' you look for the nearest place instead where you could satiate your cravings.

When you remember the olden days when you are on the roam with someone romantic, you just give way to those imaginations.

When you have what they call forgetfulness, you just kind of forget everything you've planned so hard.

But acknowledging how it is so easy to slide back eventually leads one to do better in executing the needed changes in one's life. It may not be perfect but at least, discipline is being respected.

You feel better and you're gonna be readier for some positive changes.

Well, you gotta write your journal. I gotta write a journal, a diary, or keep a planner. Discipline should be within to do the most important of all, to keep the notebook close at all times.

I would like to use a notebook or whatever writing material as my memory.

But even that, you know, it is so easy to put aside.

And that and that and that.

Saying all these and these and these.

And after all one will just easily slide back.

Hoops! Discipline! Learn from experience. Impose rules on oneself. You gotta do it. I gotta do it.

We sometimes need to be hard on ourselves at the same time painstakingly do what we can to be able to put life on the better side.

Why is it so easy to slide back? Why do we have to learn the hard way? Why do we forget past negative results and so bad things over and over?

No, not at all. It's not hard to not slide back. If we put something on to stop the slide back. Simple as that. Even if hard to execute. But reality is we can always choose the right thing to do and not blame the indulgence for the lack of discipline.

We can do this! We can! We can will our wills to happen. For our family and of course for ourselves.

If this is just part of the old cycle I will dare to break it. I may slide back a little but only for the sake of readjustment, not really to go back to square one.