The pain is there even if it is not too much

I sinned unto myself by enjoying much of life. No, abusing is the more appropriate word. I have abused life's pleasures.

And now I am suffering the consequences of my actions. The pain stays after the pleasure.

I am bearing as much as I could. But I know it won't be long for complications to come. Still, I am hoping for a good prognosis.

I am sad. Too sad it ends this way. But I've got to fight, oh, please, self!!!

And I ask, why me? I was trying my best to change. To be a good girl. But I've done a lot of damage already.

If I had known, I would just have stayed a hermit and never got curious. I know better the consequences of things. But I was lured anyway.

Lured so far away that I couldn't believe I deviated so far from my road of life. I deviated from my desires that would have done me better.

Life is so precious to waste yet I didn't think wisely. And I don't want to spend a fortune on useless things.

But then, I have to spend much now that it has come to this. I should then think about what is for the best.

Insurance. I think I should avail of its benefits. I have just messaged my underwriter and we are going to talk by Thursday.

At least whatever happens to me I have my insurance to run to. At least, I won't feel stressed so much because I have an insurance policy.

But I needed to make sure that I am not relying on false hope so I am going to consult with my insurer.

Here is to hoping for the best!

Pain pain go away, don't come back another day, your poor old soul want it away.