Go on…

I will go on. I will go on with my life. I will put my past behind and smile through it. You were my past, and I am putting you behind. But the #you, complicatedly, is a variable, not a constant. So many past… Not sure who is who…

But one thing is clear to me now, that He is the one who can help me despite what happened in the past. In my past. In the history of my life.

So I will go on with my life because He is there, ever ready to guide and speak His truths to me.

I always go astray. But He has His way of calling me back to Him. Should I stray more? I don’t want to. But this hear-headedness sometimes always lead me astray. But I will try my best not to deviate from His path.

Oh, Father… Help me with my life. Fix my messes, inside and out. You loved me first. I should love you more. I will strive to.

Thank you, Father, for the things you made me realize. I don’t think I can go on without you. Please always be with me.

Time and again, despite the extreme experiences, I forget about His words. I should then always be reminded. I keep writing about His goodness to remind me not to deviate again.

Forgive me, Father. For I have sinned. A lot… Please see still the good in me. From time to time, despite the sins that weigh me down, I also do some good stuffs. Please look upon it also, my Father.

I am at Your mercy. No one else but You. You alone can redeem me from my sinfulness.

I will go on with my life. Forgive me for the thoughts of ending my life. I have no right to take what is not mine. Thank you for guiding my thoughts and ushering them back to appreciating Your goodness to me.

Shouldn’t I take advantage of Your unlimited grace?

So I ask You to forgive me over and over. Despite my resolution to never deviate again, I still do deviate a lot.