Now I want to take you to a day under a deep blue sky, accompanied by the chirping of birds, and filled with the colorful, fresh scent of spring. The sea sparkles from place to place with the reflections of the sun. People are walking on the street, some are riding bicycles, some are laughing among themselves. Maybe you stop and find peace by seeing someone who loves stray animals, you look at the young person who picks up the small garbage from the ground and throws it in the trash can and you say “Well done”, the childish games of the dogs cheer you up. The lovers smiling hand in hand warms your heart and you think, "What a beautiful thing to live". Especially if you have someone(s) you love next to you, if you can smile and enjoy the moment together, is anyone luckier than you? You are grateful for what you have.
Yes, feeling positive, being satisfied with life, is sometimes that easy when we focus on the moment, isn't it? Well, when it is so easy to feel positive, what do we focus on most of the time instead of seeing the beauty around? Or what does the definition I call “imposed happiness” focus us on?
Today I want to talk to you about the difference between Hedonic Happiness and Eudaimonic Happiness. Thanks to the difference between these two, so you can see why sometimes feeling good is actually easy when it's hard for us.
Now think about your life, take a look at the definitions and conditions of happiness given to you from anywhere, directly or indirectly, by newspapers, magazines, TV, social media, perhaps by your surroundings; “The more you have, the more successful you are, the better you can position yourself from others, the more competitive advantage you have, the happier you will be,” many whisper. Selfies that you try to look beautiful, things you do to be better than your colleague or rival, “This phone/home/car/man/woman should be mine”… “Are you crazy? With so many well-paying jobs, is it wise to quit and say, 'I'll do what I want'?" sentences such as "Happiness is to have a branded car" advertising mottos, "It doesn't matter if he passes you in this exam, you are the most successful, the best" stuffing.. These and similar patterns that are thought to lead to happiness are actually materialist and narcissistic individuals in society. leading to an increase in the number of So what happens as a result of this?
Materialistic and narcissistic people have weak empathy skills and cannot form strong bonds. This increases the number of individuals who are isolated in society. Especially in western society, the rates of loneliness have increased considerably. Loneliness; depression, immune system disorders, sleep problems, and psychological disturbances. The age of depression has dropped from 29 50 years ago to 14 today. One stops and thinks, does this definition of happiness based on consumption, which is all around us and given from all sides, really makes us happy?
Hedonic happiness
This imposed happiness actually falls under the definition of hedonic happiness. Hedonism, which comes from the root of Hedon, means indulgence and pleasure. In the definition of Hedonic Happiness, the goal is continuous pleasure. Here, there is an effort to maximize pleasure and avoid pain in every environment. Most importantly, there is no search for meaning.
Today, the definition of hedonic happiness is placed in people's minds as the definition of true happiness. More earnings, more possessions, more lovers, more pleasure, more pleasure, more elevation. Although some of these are factors that can really bring happiness, the lack of meaning causes the equation to break.
When we see happiness as the constant pursuit of pleasure or the constant satisfaction of needs, when we meet these needs, we find ourselves in a constant "chasing" obligation. Moreover, our judgments about what will make us happy or sad are very weak (see impact bias). Therefore, something that happens to us that we think will make us happy or unhappy forever has a very short effect, or we adapt very quickly to the situation and return to our set point, that is, our general happiness levels. This state of adaptation is called “hedonic adaptation”. Since we adapt faster than we expected, we start chasing a new stimulus that we think will make us happy. It becomes a cycle and this is called the "hedonic wheel". Once we get caught up in the hedonic wheel, we actually enter a cycle similar to addictive behavior.
Hedonic wheel cycle
“My phone is useless. (Bought 6 months ago.) That newly released model is incredibly good, it takes great pictures, it has a self-extending selfie stick, and everyone is using it now. I don't have one! If I get it, I will be incredibly happy.” After the day he bought it: “I am incredibly happy, I go to bed with my phone, I wake up with my phone. I uploaded all my favorite songs, shot videos in fast mode, got a great container a month, and I'm not happy (hours of reviewing phone features etc.)“. 6 months later: “My phone is very old, the new one has amazing features again, they say they even make lattes -!-, mine can't make unfiltered coffee yet. And that makes me unhappy. I will be very happy if I get a new one.” Hedonic happiness creates dissatisfied individuals who pursue “happiness” but cannot be “happy” because of wrong definitions. However, happiness is not measured only by the things that happen to us or by the feeling of instant satisfaction. Happiness is a form of consciousness.
Eudaimonic happiness
Centuries ago, when science had almost none of the opportunities available today, Aristotle gave the closest definition to scientific happiness: “Eudaimonia is neither a state of mind expressed by momentary pleasures and moods, neither luck nor gift. Happiness expresses a general state of being.” Eudaimonia, or "the sprout of man," is a divine, blessed, and precious thing that can be learned by all through virtuous living and education. Man's perfection is not given to him, man creates it himself. The growth of man is entirely dependent on himself.
The term Eudaimonia means "the flourishing of man". Man lives with a subconscious being called daimon, which has semi-divine and human features. Eudaimonia, or happiness, arises when the Daimon is guided to the good, tamed by habits. According to Aristotle, being good or happiness is a goal that can be achieved through activities in accordance with virtue.
Virtue is to avoid excesses and deficiencies, to always seek the middle and to prefer it. Virtue, then, is a habit of choices. (Ethics to Nicomachus, 1106a-1106b) Man should see every action as a means to reach his ultimate goal, happiness, and choose actions that will enable him to achieve happiness. These actions, too, must always be directed towards what is far from excesses or deficiencies. (Ross, 2002: 251-258)
In eudaimonic happiness, it is mentioned about a meaning and value-oriented life style that is at peace with the past, himself and his environment, and aims to be compassionate and helpful. In this definition of happiness, there is an understanding of happiness based on meaningful goals and values, it requires good measure and fairness. It is a public happiness, not independent of others.
What does science say?
Today, science shows us that our biological makeup is built for the benefit of others as well as ourselves. Evolutionarily, the reason for our development is that we are social beings. We are beings whose brain's reward centers are activated when we connect. Empathy, compassion, kindness, helping have effects such as creating positive emotions and transforming health in a good way.
As Aristotle said, happiness is a state of being that can be learned and added to our lives through repetitive exercises and habits. Even with just 7 minutes of gratitude exercises a day, we can increase the level of happiness in a very short time. Happiness is a choice, the impact of life conditions on happiness is 10%, we can affect happiness 90% with chosen thoughts, behaviors and focus. In short, Aristotle is right! As claimed, materialism or money does not bring happiness under all circumstances. According to a study conducted in the USA, although wealth doubled between 1957 and 1995, there was no increase in happiness levels. Although people live in larger houses, drive better cars, and have better financial conditions, their happiness rates do not increase. The extra money has no visible contribution to the happiness levels of individuals who can meet their basic needs and feel safe.
Narcissism and materialism in the imposed definition of happiness lead us to loneliness, unhappiness and adverse health conditions. However, happy people are more successful, more social, healthier and more productive. Research conducted in 37 different countries shows that the most important feature that individuals look for in their partners is "to be a good person".
Result
Looking at these data, we can see that although the hedonic happiness lifestyle devoid of meaning causes instant increases in pleasures and positive emotion levels, it does not actually lead to a general state of happiness due to its potential to lead to addiction-like behaviors and loneliness as a result of hedonic adaptation. On the other hand, Eudaimonic happiness; It can be said that it both supports our biological structure and overlaps with scientific facts, with its emphasis on realizing human potential, existing with other people and living on the basis of values & virtue.
The meaning to be removed from the eudaimonic definition of happiness; Of course, it is not to live completely devoid of pleasures and pleasures, not to value oneself or to retreat into seclusion. The secret is to balance. Giving up self-worth for the sake of helping others, refusing all physical needs for the sake of being a good person, disregarding money and disconnecting from reality does not bring happiness either. As in Aristotle's definition of virtuous life, it is important to live them all in balance. Instead of emphasizing "I" or "others", highlighting virtues, basic human values, and actions that produce results that you would prefer to do under all circumstances. Being aware of the means and ends, not turning the means into an end. Perhaps the most important thing is to turn knowledge into wisdom and internalize it by adding it to your life and experiencing it.
Living everything in balance with no need to emphasize "I" or "others" I like this! Being contented is the key to happiness, I think.