Being a working mother.

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Avatar for heartbeat1515
4 years ago

Are you working?

Office hours?

Shifts?

Overtime?

On call?

 

I do. I work on office hours from 8 o’clock in the morning until 5 o’clock in the evening but I will leave home around 5.30 in the morning and will reach home around 8.00 at night, depending on the traffic or if I stop by to buy groceries or any other occasions. This is because my workplace are 72 kilometres away from my current home. This is a long story, let this pass first.

It was so easy going to work before I have my little girl. I did not care much if I am a bit late going home from work. Now that I have her, time seem to be always not enough. When I go to work, it is always dark and the same goes for the time that I reach home. She will still be sleeping or already asleep. The only time that I could spend with her is on weekends if I do not have on call or on my holidays.

She is my first born and my only child until now. Sometimes, I am afraid that she might forget all about me while growing up because I do not spend much time with her. She is also too friendly, and it made me jealous sometimes. When I bring her to her clinic visit, I cannot answer the nurse question properly because I do not spend much time with her. I cannot keep track of her growth like any non-working mother does. Other people keep telling me things to do. Is it because that I do not spend much time with her that make them thought I cannot be a good mother? Therefore, they keep telling me what to do and not to do?

It made me stress. I admit, there will be time that my anger was put on her. I am angry that she would not listen to me. I hit her sole of foot with my hand, she id not even cried. She even gave me her other foot to hit. It made me think, she is the only one will be able to understand my feelings. It made me feel guilty. She made me realize that nobody can understand me more than her and nobody can raise my little girl better than me. Whatever other people might say, no matter who they are, I am the mother that I want to be.

A mother who work hard to give a better promising future for my baby girl and my every free time is for her.

It does not matter what other people said, the only important thing is that I know what I want for my daughter. When she grows up, the rest will be up to her. I can never close other people mouth or silence their voice, but I can always do what I do best, without anyone else knowing. It is enough even if she will be the only one that knows everything about me.

Where is my husband? He is here but that will be another story. If I told you everything now, you will not be waiting for my next story if you have enjoyed this one.

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Avatar for heartbeat1515
4 years ago

Comments

It is not easy to become a working mom. I've also experience that with my 2kids. Im leaving home also in 6:00 am . then going home 7:00pm.

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4 years ago

Do your children remember you? I think they do. I noticed mine live without time, it's just exhausting.

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4 years ago

Yes they do. Because every Sunday is our bonding moment. I'll make sure that we spend time together by Sunday . Because weekdays is just like what you said its exhausting , that you cant play or talk to your children.

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4 years ago

I still can at some time but it is exhausting.

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4 years ago

I believe she still remember me. She still search for me when I am missing. I once heard a recording of her voice in my husband phone. She is not yet able to speak clearly but her voice sounded like, "Oh God, where is mummy? " Something like that. It make me happy.

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4 years ago

I am hoping that my long journey will end, as soon as my new house is finished.

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4 years ago

Children of a working mom is more independent. Every parents want a better future for their kids. As they grow older they will realized that. Just ignore what other people say. Just work hard for your children. Salute :)

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User's avatar Yen
4 years ago

I hope so but I also wish that in her independent life she will still need me sometimes. I tried my best to ignore others but it will still hurt at some points.

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4 years ago

Its okay as long as you overcomed it. Afterall we are still human, we all get hurt.

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User's avatar Yen
4 years ago

Agree. Sometimes, there will be a needs to carve a fake smile to cover-up tears but things will get better someday. I always believe that happiness will also come when I least expect it.

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4 years ago

It must be very difficult for you, as for many single mothers or families where both parents work. Above all, I can wish you much patience and perseverance. All parents need that. Try to spend as much time as possible with your daughter so that she has the strongest possible bond with you.

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4 years ago

If you are referring to me, I am not a single mother. I try my best to spend all the free time I have with her. I would be very happy to have a strong bond with her because that is my dream as a mother. I did not have that kind of bond with mu mother but I hope I can give more to my daughter.

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4 years ago

I thought you were a single mother like wakeupkitty. I must have gotten confused. But even so, it's very difficult for a working mother. The mothers need the children and especially the children need the mothers. If you can only spend very little time with your daughter, it is a great pity for you and for her. Try to balance it out as much as possible on weekends and during the days off.

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4 years ago

That means I got more stories to tell 😁. We are currently building a house closer to my workplace but the budget is not enough. We are managing. Holding on until everything fall into its place.

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4 years ago

I always worked. If no one gives you money there are not many options left. I worked 40-60 hours a week as a single mom. With my youngest I had some luck because I could take her with me to work, later she ended at daycare. It was hard to manage, I always felt tired but was present at school, etc. I knew what was going on and my children communicated with me with drawings and letters. At times I did ask myself "what if they get lost, someone takes them? I have no idea what they are wearing". I have only a few more years to go. I hope I can manage it and more they can take care of themselves. I feel as if I missed those years they were small but I know they didn't really miss or forgot me because time does not exist to them and I always showed up again. During the holidays we traveled and went abroad but it didn't seem to impress them or the memories fainted.

I always loved to work but looking back all those working hours, weekends included were not worth the money and time I lost but you do what you need to do and no one can decide for you what is the best unless they give you a fortune so you can stay at home.

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4 years ago

I admire a single mother that can raise their children and work at the same time. You work it out yourself and you did not depends on others. I would not know what to do if I do not have my husband to take care of our daughter while I am working, with insufficient money to hire a nanny. Even if I can get a nanny, I will not be happy because it is hard for me to trust other people to take care of my daughter. I am afraid of a lot of things.

Maybe if the fortune is big enough they can decide for me but if the fortune will bring me to a bad end, I am alright working all my life for a fortune.

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4 years ago

I admire you being so strong 🙂, single mom is not easy but you manage to handle it without complaining a lot. I wish you have a good time now, I mean a comfortable life. You deserve that. God bless you...

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4 years ago

You know what it is? If you have to do it you do it. There were and are no other options. I reached my children to do as much as possible themselves at a very young age. My only fear was if something happens to me they cannot survive, make a call, etc. Now they are getting older my life is easier and I have helpful children. 😊

Thank you for your wishes. I wish you the same.

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4 years ago

Am not a mother yet, but i have learnt alot from this. And i will sure expect your next post.

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4 years ago

I was like that when my baby was at 3 months old and up, because I came back to work after 3 months leave. At that time we are not close, It makes me sad they're too close with her father and we're not I felt very jealous, that time her dad still waiting for his application that's why he was the one nurse her. But when my husband got his job I resigned, I need to because I don't want other people to be her nanny or what. You must spend time with her as much as possible, so you can have a strong bond with her. The joy of being a full time mom seeing your child milestone of growth is priceless, but it also depends on the situation. Just at least make time with her and cope up.

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4 years ago

How is the relationship between your child and it's father now? Did anything change between them?

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4 years ago

When my husband is at home they're still very close, at young age my child doesn't forget about her dad. She's 2yrs and 7 months old but remember her dad clearly 🙂 my husband is a seaman, so his not home often times. Every time her dad video calls, she's very excited and get the cp from me 🤦 they'll talk and I'm out 😂 their bond is very thight ...

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4 years ago

That is great to hear. Interesting how she uses the phone. Mine still don't like it. If the phone rings no one will take the call.

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4 years ago

Yeah working mother is a tough one, especially with so many fatherless families. This has been a huge problem for African America families and a key factor towards crime and lack of property. Got to include the social welfare programmes in that too. Formula for success is known but unfortunately too many people don't know it. Good to listen to Larry Elder. A very wise man indeed.

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4 years ago

I never heard of Larry Elder before. I believe that someone who is striving for success will find their way to excellent no matter what even without guidelines.

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4 years ago

On an individual basis yes many can. But on a population basis no. And this what Larry points out. ;)

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4 years ago

I think she'll grow up to be a good girl when she comes to understand everything you do for her. Let's just hope her future peers would be as understanding

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4 years ago

Thank you. I believe she will be an understanding person someday.

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4 years ago