I hurriedly went downstairs to answer the ringing phone, wondering who might be calling ... i answered it with an excitement tone,Hello! and it turns out that it was a long distance call from a friend from our province .Oh hello! what makes you call ? Uhm i just called to tell you about your bestfriend Agnes.. Huh? what about her? i asked ,and told him that me and Agnes were just talking over the phone about 2 days ago! Uhhhhmm...she was rushed to the hospital about an hour ago,she overdosed herself with some pills! Whaaat?? is she ok? tell her to wait for me , i'll go and take the last trip .With a sad and almost whispered voice , he told me. Dont rush you can go home early in the morning,it is not safe for you to travel alone at this hour of the night...Agnes is gone...

Highschool days.

Highschool days was for me the start of my real world.Meeting new friends and acquaintances. Widening my horizons,trying new things and yes having my very first real bff or bestfriend, she's Agnes. She is a bubbly girl with dimples on her sweet angelic face. She is not just a pretty face ,she's also a smart but funny at the same time.

Whenever time permits us.We always go to their house after school hours.Together with our friends we will walk through their house and cooked our meals .We will harvest eggplant ,mangoes and pomelo from their backyard and chip in to buy fish from the nearby market and feast with our lunch serve in banana leaves. Sometimes me and other friends will sleep over to their place to attend street parties at night.We are inseparable and partner in crime as they say.We are like sisters.

But behind her bubbly attitude is a sad girl who is suffering from deppression that only few of her close friends knew about.Anxiety attacks and deppression that would lead to attempted suicides many times. You can see her always wearing a rolled hanky over her wrist to cover the slashes on it.Sometimes she would attempt to drink chlorine or anything that would poison her to end her life.But since i was always there to listen ,always around to talk and cheer her up ...many times i succeeded to control her urge to commit suicide.You can never tell at school that she is dealing with something coz she's always happy but i know and it makes me want to be with her side all the time.

Finally we were able to graduate highschool.We were full of dreams and for quite sometime ,she didnt hurt herself.I am so relieve telling myself ,atlast she got over it and she will be fine without me. We promised to get in touch even if we are in a different university.

Goodbye

Excited over our new journey.We always exchange letters to update our happenings. Mobile phones are not yet in trend those days.I stayed in my moms brothers house in Quezon City coz my school is just a ride away from it and Agnes went to Manila. We also called each other every now and then.

One day, i received a letter from her. A three yellow page back to back long letter.I was excited as usual as i opened it.Written was the usual " kumustahan" or asking how is life going on with me in my new school.Then follow with her not usual storytelling.I could sense something weird but disregard the feeling.She told me that she was so happy coz finally she was offered a job to Japan.A relative of her lives and work there too. It is a dream come true for her coz she wants to take care of all the needs of her family.

Two days after i received the letter,she called me up.We talked about her plans and we are both happy coz she set up a date for us to meet somewhere . She seems so ok and excited about our meeting.Telling me how much she misses me and how excited she is to work and give back to all her parents sacrifices.She said bye for now sissy , i love you!

Then after two days again,the call came...and Agnes is gone. I cried the whole night as i packed my things so i could catch the first trip early in the morning,bringing the 3 pages of letter she sent me. As i walked into their gate i could hardly contain my tears . This is it and this time it was real. Agnes lying in a white coffin .I can't recognize her face because she's bloated with the pills she tooked. Her mom said that she tried to vomit the pills and tell her she does'nt want to go yet but it was too late.I gave the letters she sent me to her mom.And she hugged me tight asking me if she could keep it,and i said yes.Part of the letter was all about her mom ,how she loved her so much.About her plans for her family.

Gone too soon. I attended her funeral and for the last time i bid goodbye. Whispering " bye for now sissy, i love you". You gave me my first broken heart sissy...Why you leave us too soon.I dont know how long will i grieve from your loss but i will keep on praying for your soul.

Closing thought

I dont mean to write sad stories over and over.Maybe some will notice it but i cant help but share stories that happened in the past.It was all the reason why i became strong ,contented and grateful of my life. They say that when someone close to your heart like family or love ones passed away , they will turn as your angel to guide you.I want to believe that even if she was gone the other way around...Praying hard that God with his mercy still turn her to be my angel. so ,. My first angel is my bestfriend Agnes.

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