I flip the hourglass and a flash of the past has gone thru my memory. I'm dazed by the tears that roll down my cheeks. I wipe the moisture off with my own two hands as I slowly close my eyes while I let out a deep sigh. I've been envious of my younger self that I sometimes resort to koreanovelas just to satisfy my dried up emotions.
I am not complaining but feelings are feelings. How we act on it is what matters.
And life must be lived as it should and no one can go back to the past. We march on forward and not backwards. Up the hills of goals, down the steep mountains of struggles, on the vast ocean of life, we do all we can to live another day, even if it means sacrificing our pleasures.
I brush my hair and look at the mirror. I search for my bag and my fingers touch for the red lipstick. I love the tinge of rose on my lips and I feel sexy wearing it. But then, life struck hard that I am brought back to reality. I thought, "I've lived a good youth and I'm happy with it." True enough, we gracefully surrender our youth to the wisdom we gain as we grow old and older.
I move forward. I review my list of things to do, my plans and my diary. Somehow I appreciate the wisdom I gain as I age. I've opened the message of one of my seniors and she is asking me to join her with financial consultation. I gladly accepted and we scheduled our zoom meeting. Such is a financial advisor who does things wonderfully. I'm very much ready to listen and take note of all financial lessons she will be giving me. It's free of charge.
Reminiscing the past makes me realize how far I've travelled. My first taste of wine, first taste of love, my first taste of success, and every first I've experienced has been the greatest milestones to the achievement I am enjoying as of today. We all have regrets like not marrying the one we first gave our hearts into, or not grabbing the opportunity of scholarship that came knocking at our door, or not sticking to our job years before. But they all gave us valuable lessons which we may pass to our descendants.
I listen to people's voices. Here and there you see sparkles that has either left or stayed with a person. Some are satisfied while others long so much for what they've lost that it begin to consume their souls. I've heard so many stories but one thing remains the same--we all have our own stories to tell.
As the hourglass starts to measure the passage of time, so does the memories start piling up until all that we are today are remnants of the past.
I'm envious of my youth but my youth made sure I had something to look back to when I'm made forlorn and desolate. My younger self tells me stories bout my life and how I live it. And life becomes colorful as it should! We just need to allow moments to take over sometimes...
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