On the Verge Of Death | My Health Challenges, Losing Weight & Fitness Journey

Hi all...this post is long overdue because I needed to sift through so many photos and select the best ones to include in this post. But before I proceed, here's a disclaimer:

This is a very personal post and it is about my journey. It is about what I have been through, my experiences, and things that worked out for me. I am not giving anyone professional advice or anything like that. I am not endorsing anything other than living a healthier lifestyle. I am not saying my experience or choices are better than anyone else. If you disagree with my choices, please refrain from judging and criticizing. And please refrain from giving unsolicited advice too. It's not appreciated. Thank you.

Diagnosed With Cholelithiasis and Cholecystitis

About five years ago, I was diagnosed with cholelithiasis (gallbladder stones) and cholecystitis (inflammation of the gallbladder) after suffering from chronic gastritis. This disease causes complications when stones obstruct the common bile duct that impedes bile flow from the liver to the intestines. The duct blockage caused severe abdominal pains, and I had to be hospitalized. The doctor suggested surgery to remove my gallbladder before the disease progressed to a more serious stage which could be fatal.

However, I didn't go for the surgery immediately because I was dealing with some other challenges simultaneously. So, needless to say, I was in and out of the hospital several times before the surgery was performed a couple of months later.

I was recovering without serious complications and went about my life disease-free for the next 2 years. In April 2020, I started to experience another episode of severe abdominal pain similar to what I had experienced before. Initially, I thought it was just a bad case of gastritis and ignored it. But it turned serious when I started to develop a high fever. I made an appointment to see my doctor, and an Endoscopic Ultrasound (EUS) was scheduled immediately. And guess what...she found bile sludge on my bile duct that obstructs the bile flow once again! The obstruction caused liver inflammation, which was why I had a fever. An ERCP (endoscopic procedure to remove the sludge) was scheduled first thing the next morning, and I was told to fast in preparation for the procedure.

The procedure was a success, and again, I went back to my normal life as I had before. Everything went well for the next 3 months until July 2020, I had another episode of severe abdominal pain! Oh no, not again!

However, this time I was diagnosed with a more serious illness - stones in my liver! I went through unbearable pain and was on the verge of death. I was hospitalized several times before the doctors removed all traces of stones from my liver. I am not going to bore you with the details of my illness. It suffices to say that I almost died and was in a lot of pain, and took countless intravenous drips and pills. My hands were blue-black from numerous needle pokes and procedures. 2020 was a terrible time not just because of the pandemic but also because I was going through my own personal hell concurrently.

I was finally given a clean bill of health on my last visit to the doctor in October 2020.

Time To Reflect

I spent the next few months reflecting on my experience. Why did this happen to me? What needs to change to prevent it from happening again in the future?

I researched the disease and found that I fit the 4F criteria - female, fat, forty, fertile. I can't change the fact that I am an over forty female who is yet to experience menopause. But I do have control over one thing - fat. My family has a strong genetic predisposition to obesity and cardiovascular diseases. It doesn't help that we have an apple-shaped body, which accumulates fat mostly on our tummy. It seemed beyond my control, but I told myself I would not be defeated by my genetics. I resolved to change my dietary habit and include more physical activities in my daily life.

I was 74kg (163 lbs) at my heaviest, and that was 5 years ago. It was a lot of weight to carry for someone who is just 150cm (4 ft 9 inches). I wasn't happy with how I looked, and I felt tired easily. Minimal exertion would make me breathless. I knew I was not doing well physically, but I ignored it.

These pictures were taken when I was at my heaviest. I was smiling all the time, but deep within, I felt ashamed of how bad I looked. I remember when the doctors were desperately looking for the veins in my arms, but they were having a hard time because my arm was too fat. That moment gave me an epiphany - I need to do something for my health.

It's Time To Change

The traumatic experiences I had to deal with caused me to develop depression and anxiety. And that was when I decided to take the opportunity to seek help from a mental health professional and started my counseling in November 2020. During one of the sessions, my counselor encouraged me to pursue healthy living and make small changes to my dietary habit. She suggested I go for yoga, and I implemented her suggestions. Baby steps at first, but I felt so empowered to do more every time I accomplished something.

I evaluated my diet and decided to adopt the Malaysian Healthy Plate (MHP), which emphasizes on Quarter Quarter Half (QQH) concept.

• ¼ plate grains or grain products, preferably whole grains such as brown rice or wholemeal bread

• ¼ plate fish or, poultry, meat, or egg

• ½ plate of fruits and vegetables

Some pictures of my typical daily meals.

I started to exercise too. As I mentioned above, I began to do yoga daily. After a couple of months of it, I felt I wasn't progressing much, and I decided to try something more strenuous - jog. I signed up for several virtual marathons under the 5K category. Lockdowns and Covid restrictions didn't deter me from completing my runs. When we were prohibited from going to the parks, I completed my run around my apartment. I was determined not to give excuses. I worked out 5 to 6 days a week, and as I became fitter, I started to sign up for the virtual half marathons. My weight slowly melted, and I felt stronger than ever before. My mental health began to improve too, and after 6 months of counseling, I was given the green light to stop my sessions.

However, I discovered jogging/running wasn't too kind to my knees. I had to find something gentle on my knees but still give me the intense workout I enjoyed. And I discovered boxing after watching a Korean drama. (I had a celeb crush on the main character, who was a boxer 😁). I thought, well, why not? It looks fun. Cardio boxing or fitness boxing is a big thing among Hollywood celebrities, and there are plenty of YT videos about it.

Cardio-boxing is a combination of the traditional training movements of a boxer—including sparring, shadow boxing, and blows delivered to a boxing bag—structured so as to be performed in sequences, similar to those of aerobics classes, that have a primarily aerobic training effect. Cardio-boxing also developed its own offshoot, cardio kickboxing, where martial arts movements involving blows delivered with the feet are incorporated into the training routine. Source: Encyclopedia.com

I fell in love with this sport because it incorporates cardio and strength training. Someone suggested I train at a boxing gym, but I had to decline her offer due to some challenges. I bought a pair of 10oz boxing gloves, a medium-size punching bag, and hand wraps. Simple equipment, but I always had a blast working out at home. Here are some of the things I have at my mini-gym at home - resistant bands, boxing boots, a smartwatch to track my progress, gloves, wraps. I don't go to the gym, but that is no excuse to not exercise.

My punching bag and gloves.

My collection of bandanas or scarves. A bandana is an essential piece of my sportswear to prevent sweat from trickling into my eyes 😅

The entrance to a local park where I go for my jog or walk.

And my collection of marathon medals. I am very proud of my collection 😘

The Result...I Am A Work-In-Progress

This is me now, 15kg (33 lbs) lighter. I am not putting up this picture here to show how good I look. I am just so proud of myself for accomplishing this. Never in my wildest dream that I dare to achieve this, but here I am. My physical health is not the only thing that improved. I am doing so much better mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.

I will continue my fitness journey for the rest of my life. My day is incomplete without exercise, and I work out 5-6 days a week, 1-hour session each and every time. It's a promise I made to myself.

My Motivation and Final Thoughts

My motivation? Simple, my family. While I was lying alone on my hospital bed, I thought about my husband, my kids, my mom, my siblings. I realized that I wasn't the only one who was suffering but my family was badly affected because of my illness. I had to send my kids to live with my relatives because my husband had to work, and we had no babysitters. It was hard for them, and it was hard for my husband too. He was the one who had to fork out the money to pay for my medical bills. My insurance was maxed out, and we had to settle the rest of the bills using our savings. I spend close to MYR30K (USD7K) on extra expenses like paying for deposits and stuff like that. My siblings and mom helped us a lot and I am forever grateful for their unwavering support. Some of that money was from my Steemit earnings. (Side note: that explains why I am not a whale yet 😂).

I resolved to change my bad habit and become a better person. I will not become a burden to my family and vow to always try my best to keep the promise to myself. I might still fall sick again in the future but at least my conscience is clear, and I am doing my best to reduce the risk of that happening again.

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That's it for now. If you read this far, thank you. I appreciate it so much! Kindly give me a follow if you like my content. I mostly write about making art, life musing, and our mundane yet charming family life here in Klang Valley, Malaysia.

Thank you for visiting and reading my post. I hope you like it!

My First NFT Collection – Stencil 2017 – Is Now Available On OpenSea

My Second NFT Collection – Oli Kawaii Verse – Is Now Available On OpenSea